Naked Science Forum
General Discussion & Feedback => Just Chat! => Topic started by: Alan McDougall on 09/10/2008 20:09:38
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[COLOR="DarkSlateBlue"][SIZE="3"]Funny Thoughts To Ponder:
When does it stop being partly cloudy and start being partly sunny?
Are eyebrows considered facial hair?
If a baby's leg pops out at 11:59 at birth but his head doesn't come out until 12:01, which day was he born on?
In the song Yankee Doodle, is he calling the horse or the feather "macaroni"?
Is there a time limit on fortune cookie predictions?
Since bread is square, then why is sandwich meat round?
Do they have the word "dictionary" in the dictionary?
Can you daydream at night?
Why is it that on a phone or calculator the number five has a little dot on it?
Can crop circles be square?
If ghosts can walk through walls and glide down stairs, why don't they fall through the floor?
Is it legal to travel down a road in reverse, as long as your following the direction of the traffic?
When Atheists go to court, do they have to swear on the bible?
Why is vanilla ice cream white when vanilla extract is brown?
Can animals commit suicide?
What do you do when you see an endangered animal that is eating an endangered plant?
If a doctor suddenly had a heart attack while doing surgery, would the other doctors work on the doctor or the patient?
How can something be "new" and "improved"? if it's new, what was it improving on?
Why aren't drapes double sided so it looks nice on the inside and outside of your home?
When two people marry, they say, "you may kiss the bride". What do they say if two MEN get married?
Why is it that when we "skate on thin ice", we can "get in hot water"?
Why do people say beans beans the magical fruit when beans are vegetables?
If laughter is the best medicine, who's the idiot who said they 'died laughing'?
If money doesn't grow on trees then why do banks have branches?
Why are the little styrofoam pieces called peanuts?
Why does the Easter bunny carry eggs? Rabbits don't lay eggs.
Do siamese twins pay for one ticket or two tickets when they go to movies and concerts?
Why are they called 'Jolly Ranchers'? Who said that the ranchers were jolly?
Why does caregiver and caretaker mean the same thing?
Can a short person "talk down" to a taller person?
If a bald person works as a chef at a restaurant, do they have to wear a hairnet?
If milk goes bad if not refrigerated, does it go bad if the cow isnt refrigerated?
How fast do hotcakes sell?
Do prison buses have emergency exits?
Do astronauts change their clocks when they move over different time zones in space?
Can a black person join the kkk?
When lightning strikes the ocean why don't all the fish die?
When there's two men who "get married", do they both go to the same bachelor party?
If a guy that was about to die in the electric chair had a heart attack should they save him?
Why are there interstate highways in Hawaii?
Do Jewish vampires avoid crosses or Stars of David?
If London Bridge is standing why is there a song about it falling down?
Why is it that before 9/11 they always showed the emergency broadcast system test, and on 9/11 they never used it?
If a nursing mother had her nipples pierced would the milk come out of all three holes?
Who was Sadie Hawkins?
If a stripper gets breast implants can she write it off on her taxes as a business expense?
Why do we sing "Rock a bye baby" to lull a baby to sleep when the song is about putting your baby in a tree and letting the wind crash the cradle on the ground?
If parents say, "Never take candy from strangers" then why do we celebrate Halloween?
Do the minutes on the movie boxes include the previews, credits, and special features, or just the movie itself?
Is there ever a day that mattresses are not on sale?
What does PU stand for (as in "PU, that stinks!")?
Why do we put suits in a garment bag and put garments in a suitcase?
Can cannibals be arrested for being under the influence of alcohol (e.g. drunk-driving) if they have eaten someone who was drunk?
What is the stage of a reptile when it has eggs in it but they haven't been laid. Are they pregnant?
If Mars had earthquakes would they be called marsquakes?
Why do people never say "it's only a game" when they're winning?
If an ambulance is on its way to save someone, and it runs someone over, does it stop to help them?
Why is it called a funny bone, when if you hit it, it's not funny at all?
Do you yawn in your sleep?
Why do dogs like the smell of other dogs butts?
If a cannible was on death row could he ask for the last guy that was electricuted for his last meal?
Do Chinese people get English sayings tattooed on their bodies?
Do glow-in-the-dark objects stop glowing when somebody turns the lights on?
If you died with braces on would they take them off?
If someone has their nose pierced, have a cold, and take thier nose ring out. Does snot come out of the piercing hole?
How come lemon washing up liquid contains real lemons, but lemon juice contains artificial flavorings.
Do you wake up or open your eyes first?
Did Noah have woodpeckers on the ark? If he did, where did he keep them?
Why are builders afraid to have a 13th floor but book publishers aren't afraid to have a Chapter 11?
How do you handcuff a one-armed man?
If the FBI breaks your door down do they have to pay for it?
In some books, why do they have blank pages at the very end?
Why can't donuts be square?
Why put a towel in the dirty clothes basket if when you get out of the shower you are clean?
What happens to an irrisitable force when it hits an immovable object?
If there's a speed of sound and a speed of light is there a speed of smell?
Why do overalls have bel loops, since they are held up at the top by the straps?
Do people in prison celebrate halloween.... if so how?
Do the security guards at airports have to go through airport security when they get to work?
Why are all of the Harry Potter spells in Latin if they're English?
What do Greeks say when they don't understand something?
What happens if a queen gives birth to a pair of siamese twins? Who gets to be king?
Do all-boys schools have girls bathrooms? Conversely, do all-girls schools have boys bathrooms?
Are children who act in rated 'R' movies allowed to see them?
How come cats butts go up when you pet them?
What would happen to the sea's water level if every boat in the World was taken out of the water at the same time?
How come you never see a billboard being put up by the highway?
Do the English people eat English muffins, or are they just called muffins?
How much deeper would the ocean be if sponges didn't grow in it?
Why do they call it the Department of Interior when they are in charge of everything outdoors?
Why does Jello have a smell when you add the powder in the water, but when it "gels" the smell is gone?
Why are dogs noses always wet?
If a bee is allergic to pollen would it get the hives?
Why do people say "heads up" when you should duck?
Why is it OK for dudes to slap other dudes' asses in football, but not in any other situation?
Why does triangularly cut bread taste better than square bread?
If one man says, "it was an uphill battle," and another says, "it went downhill from there," how could they both be having troubles?
Why does a round pizza come in a square box?
At what point in man's evolution did he start wiping his ass?
Do bald people get Dandruff?
Why is it that no matter what color bubble bath you use the bubbles are always white?
Why do superheros wear their underwear on the outside of their clothes?
If you get cheated by the Better Business Bureau, who do you complain to?
When sign makers go on strike, is anything written on their signs?
Why does someone believe you when you say there are four billion stars, but check when you say the paint is wet?
Can you cry under water?
Why Does Pluto Live in a dog house, eat dog food, etc. but Goofy, who is also a dog, lives in a condo and drives a car?
If you blew a bubble in space would it pop?
Are children who use sign language allowed to talk with their mouth full?
How come all of the planets are spherical?
How did the first women ever to shave their legs know that the skin wouldn't just peel right off?
when a pregnant lady has twins, is there 1 or 2 umbilical cords?
Why doesn't Winnie the Pooh ever get stung by the bees he messes with?
Why do they put holes in crackers?
Can you still say "Put it where the sun don't shine " on a nude beach?
What do people in China call their good plates?
How come toy hippos are always blue, or purple, when real hippos are brown?
Why don't woodpeckers get headaches when they slam their head on a tree all day?
If someone owns a piece of land, do they own it all the way to the center of the earth?
If an escalotor breaks down, does it become stairs?
Why do they call him Donkey Kong if he is not a donkey?
Why do they say a football team is the 'world champion' when they don't play anybody outside the US?
Do stuttering people stutter when they're thinking to themselves?
If you put a chameleon in a room full of mirrors, what color would it turn?
What are the handles for corn on the cob called?
Why do British people never sound British when they sing?
Why do we press the start button to turn off the computer?
Do your eyes change color when you die?
Were Mary and Joseph's surname Christ before Jesus was born?
If a bunch of cats jump on top of each other, is it still called a dog pile?
Do sheep get static cling when they rub against one another?
In libraries, do they put the bible in the fiction or non-fiction section?
How old are you before it can be said you died of old age?
If K.F.C Stands for Kentucky Fried Chicken, Why do they play sweet home Alabama on the comercials?
If people with one arm go to get their nails done, do they pay half price?
What type of animal is Snuffaluffagus?
If you had a three story house and were in the second floor, isn't it possible that you can be upstairs and downstairs at the same time?
Can a hearse carrying a corpse drive in the carpool lane?
If a king is gay and marries another guy what is that guy to the royal family?
Why do they call it "getting your dog fixed" if afterwards it doesn't work anymore?
Does a 'Marks-A-Lot' marker, mark any more than a regular marker?
If you really could dig a hole to China, and you did, and you fell in, would you stop in the middle because of gravity?
If the funeral procession is at night, do folks drive with their headlights off?
What happens when you put a lightsaber in water?
On Gilligan's Island, how did Ginger have so many different outfits when they were only going on a 3 hour tour?
If I had my legs amputated, would I have to change my height and weight on my driver's license?
If nobody buys a ticket to a movie do they still show it?
How do you tell when you run out of invisible ink?
Do movie producers still say lights, camera, and action when it is a dark scene?
What do you call male ballerinas?
How does Freddy Kruger wipe his butt?
Why people are so scared of mice,which are much smaller than us, when no one seems to be scared of Micky Mouse, who is bigger than us?
Why are the numbers on a calculator and a phone reversed?
Why are plastic bears the only animal you can get honey from? Why can't you get honey from a plastic bee?
Can bald men get lice?
When your photo is taken for your driver's license, why do they tell you to smile? If you are stopped by the police and asked for your license, are you going to be smiling?
Do butterflies remember life as a caterpillar?
If you undergo chemotherapy do you lose your pubic hairs?
Why do people constantly return to the refrigerator with hopes that something new to eat will have materialized?
Does the postman deliver his own mail?
Why does toilet bowl cleaner only come in the color blue?
What happens when you put hand sanitizer on a place other then your hand?
Why are women and men's shoe sizes different?
Can you "stare off into space" when you're in space?
Where do people in Hell tell other people to go?
Is "vice-versa" to a dyslexic just plain redundant?
How come you can kill a deer and put it up on your wall. but it's illegal to keep one as a pet?
Why do we say we're head over heels when we're happy? Isn't that the way we normally are?
If prunes are dehydrated plums, where does prune juice come from?
Is it appropriate to say "good mourning" at a funeral?
If there's an exception to every rule, is there an exception to that rule?
When you're caught "between a rock and a hard place", is the rock not hard?
Was Jesus a virgin when he died?
Why is there a light in the fridge and not in the freezer?
Doesn't a lightning rod on top of church show a lack of faith?
Who coined the phrase, 'coined the phrase?'
If there were a thousand seaguls in an airplane while its flying, each weighing two pounds a piece, but they were all flying in the airplane, would the airplane weigh 2000 pounds more?
If you soak a raisin in water, does it turn back into a grape?
How important does a person have to be before they are considered assassinated instead of just murdered?
Why do they call steam rollers, steam rollers? They don't produce, get rid of, or have anythong to do with steam
What is another word for "thesaurus"?[/SIZE][/color]
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Why does toilet bowl cleaner only come in the color blue?
Blue is the complementary colour to yellow (the default appearance of sanitary porcelain) - so when they go together the results should appear white.
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In the song Yankee Doodle, is he calling the horse or the feather "macaroni"?
The feather in the hat is being sarcastically described as "macaroni" (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Macaroni_(fashion)): an extravagant form of dress.
Why is it that on a phone ... the number five has a little dot on it?
The bump is a reference so those unable to see the keys, i.e. in darkness, or blind, can still identify them.
When Atheists go to court, do they have to swear on the bible?
In UK courts one can choose to "affirm" that they will tell the truth, without making any reference to god.
Why does the Easter bunny carry eggs? Rabbits don't lay eggs.
It was once thought that hares laid eggs: some birds lay eggs in hollows on the ground which look like hare "forms (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Hare#Differences_from_rabbits)".
Do Siamese twins pay for one ticket or two tickets when they go to movies and concerts?
If London Bridge is standing why is there a song about it falling down?
London Bridge was rebuilt in America (Arizona) (http://www.roadtripamerica.com/places/havasu.htm)
when a pregnant lady has twins, is there 1 or 2 umbilical cords?
Twins can share a placenta...
the majority of monozygotic twins share the same placenta and amniotic sac,(although not always) while dizygotic twins do not.
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Twin
If you get cheated by the Better Business Bureau, who do you complain to?
That's a bit like the question: why is there only one "monopoly and mergers commission" ? [:)]
Can bald men get lice?
Yes, body lice (http://www.sciencephoto.com/images/imagePopUpDetails.html?pop=1&id=902650084&pviewid=&country=67&search=body+AND+louse&matchtype=FUZZY) and pubic lice (http://www.sciencephoto.com/images/imagePopUpDetails.html?pop=1&id=902650094&pviewid=&country=67&search=pubic+AND+lice&matchtype=FUZZY).
If there's an exception to every rule, is there an exception to that rule?
This is a reference to a much misused expression that "the exception proves the rule",
which actually means one exception is required to prove a rule is false, (exceptions do not prove a rule is true).
If there were a thousand seaguls in an airplane while its flying, each weighing two pounds a piece, but they were all flying in the airplane, would the airplane weigh 2000 pounds more?
Yes (http://www.thenakedscientists.com/forum/index.php?topic=17337.msg197559#msg197559).
Why do they call steam rollers, steam rollers? They don't produce, get rid of, or have anythong to do with steam
They were originally powered by steam, (like steam trains).
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I guess these are a list of American questions.
When does it stop being partly cloudy and start being partly sunny?
It depends on the time of day, and where you live.
Cloud cover is measured in octares, that is, how many eights of the sky are covered in cloud.
When the (predominately opzque) cloud cover is between 3/8 and 5/8 and it is daytime, then the conditions can be described as partly sunny. Partly cloudy has the same percentage of cloud cover as partly sunny, but can be used to describe both day and night conditions.
Partly sunny, is mainly used in America and mostly by "weather presenters".
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RD
I am impressed you seem to know the answers to most of those questions, I must look at them again and see what you did not answer.
The one about birds flying in an aeroplane often comes up. Assuming you could put the whole plane on a huge scale with the birds sitting down. Then the whole lot take off and fly inside the plane. Random flapping of many birds would cancell out and effect on the scale and it would remain steady.
But put one huge bird hypothetical weighing a 10 000 hypothetical kilograms , the scale will oscillate as the bird flaps its wings on by 5 000 on the downward and upward flap.
The same effect as a person jumping would create by up and down on a bathroom scale scale ("I think" and stand corrected if I am wrong)
Alan
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In the song Yankee Doodle, is he calling the horse or the feather "macaroni"?
The feather in the hat is being sarcastically described as "macaroni": an extravagant form of dress.
That one jumped right out at me, too! I remembered learning about it at one point or another. Here's the reference from Wikipedia going into a bit more detail, just for those of us who like history:
The mention of 'Macaroni' is a reference to an over the top sense of fashion and the men who took part in it, whom were often referred to as the "Macaroni Club". One version of the Yankee Doodle lyrics is attributed to Doctor Richard Shuckburgh, a British Army surgeon, who wrote the song after witnessing the unprofessional appearance of Colonel Thomas Fitch, Jr., the son of Connecticut Governor Thomas Fitch, who arrived in Albany in 1755 with the Connecticut militia.
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Do they have the word "dictionary" in the dictionary?
Of course they do!
dic·tion·ar·y (dksh-nr)
n. pl. dic·tion·ar·ies
1. A reference book containing an alphabetical list of words, with information given for each word, usually including meaning, pronunciation, and etymology.
2. A book listing the words of a language with translations into another language.
3. A book listing words or other linguistic items in a particular category or subject with specialized information about them: a medical dictionary.
4. Computer Science
a. A list of words stored in machine-readable form for reference, as by spelling-checking software.
b. An electronic spelling checker.
Can crop circles be square?
Does this count?
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Can animals commit suicide?
This may be a little bit of a stretch, but...
"When driven to extremes animals will terminate their own lives be it by starvation, suffocation, or blunt force trauma. The most common type of animal suicide is that in which an animal (usually a dog) forms a very strong bond with either a human being or another an animal and then loses that significant other. Dogs in such situations sometimes go into depression and reject food and attention until they eventually.
It has also been observed that, under the right circumstances, scorpions will commit suicide by repeatedly stinging themselves in the head. These circumstances generally involving very high temperature situations."
http://wiki.answers.com/Q/Do_any_animals_other_than_humans_commit_suicide
Why do people say beans beans the magical fruit when beans are vegetables?
""Beans, Beans, the Magical Fruit" is a children's song about the flatulence often experienced after eating beans. The song is noteworthy for correctly identifying the bean as a fruit, not a vegetable. Yet beans, along with many other fruits, are regarded as vegetables due to their common usage as such “[[1]]”. The decision to classify certain fruits as vegetables was officially resolved in 1893 when the Supreme Court unanimously decided the tomato was a vegetable, at which time Justice Gray also clarified the status of cucumbers, squash, peas and beans as vegetables."
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Bean
How fast do hotcakes sell?
SELL LIKE HOT CAKES - "Hot cakes cooked in bear grease or pork lard were popular from earliest times in American. First made of cornmeal, the griddle cakes or pancakes were of course best when served piping hot and were often sold at church benefits, fairs, and other functions. So popular were they that by the beginning of the 19th century 'to sell like hot cakes' was a familiar expression for anything that sold very quickly effortlessly, and in quantity." From "Encyclopedia of Word and Phrase Origins" by Robert Hendrickson (Facts on File, New York, 1997)
Who was Sadie Hawkins?
"Sadie Hawkins Day is a pseudo-holiday that originated in Al Capp's classic hillbilly comic strip, Li'l Abner (1934 to 1977). The event is still observed in the form of dances at which girls approach (or chase after) boys. In Li'l Abner, Sadie Hawkins was the daughter of one of Dogpatch's earliest settlers, Hekzebiah Hawkins. The "homeliest gal in all them hills", she grew frantic waiting for suitors to come a-courtin'. When she reached the age of 35, still a spinster, her father was even more frantic - about Sadie living at home for the rest of his life. In desperation, he called together all the unmarried men of Dogpatch and declared it "Sadie Hawkins Day". Specifically, a foot race was decreed, with Sadie in hot pursuit of the town's eligible bachelors - and matrimony as the consequence."
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Sadie_Hawkins
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Here is my attempt to answer a few
Are eyebrows considered facial hair? Yes
If a baby's leg pops out at 11:59 at birth but his head doesn't come out until 12:01, which day was he born on?
That is a breach birth I say when the head comes out
Do they have the word "dictionary" in the dictionary? Yes I checked
Can crop circles be square? Yes
If ghosts can walk through walls and glide down stairs, why don't they fall through the floor? The ghost walks at the floor level when it was still alive
Can animals commit suicide? Maybe some dogs give their lives for their masters whales beach themselves
If a doctor suddenly had a heart attack while doing surgery, would the other doctors work on the doctor or the patient? I would say both
Do siamese twins pay for one ticket or two tickets when they go to movies and concerts? Conjoined twins pay two tickets and they insist on this as they are two people
Why do caregiver and caretaker mean the same thing? I say they mean two different things a caregiver cares for a person, a care taker looks after buildings etc
When lightning strikes the ocean why don't all the fish die?
The ocean is one great conductor
Why do dogs like the smell of other dog’s butts? They must like it they do it enough
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If a stripper gets breast implants can she write it off on her taxes as a business expense?
Here's news story on that very subject: http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/world/europe/1123839.stm
Can a black person join the kkk?
Story and video concerning a black cop who went undercover as a KKK member: http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/10928153/
And, of course, Dave Chappel's comedy skit about a blind black man who is a white supremacist: http://www.realvideosite.com/Comedy_102_Dave-Chapelle---Black-white-supremacist-clip
Why do we sing "Rock a bye baby" to lull a baby to sleep when the song is about putting your baby in a tree and letting the wind crash the cradle on the ground?
""Rock-a-bye Baby" may be an American nursery rhyme and lullaby, whose melody may be a variant of the English satirical ballad Lilliburlero. Originally titled "Hushabye Baby", this nursery rhyme was said to be the first poem written on American soil. Although there is no evidence as to when the lyrics were written, it may date from the 1600s. It is rumoured that it was written by a young pilgrim who sailed to America on the Mayflower. He was said to have observed the way native-American women rocked their babies in birch-bark cradles, which were suspended from the branches of trees, allowing the wind to rock the baby to sleep. However, the branches holding the cradles sometimes had a habit of breaking, causing the cradle to fall and the baby in it to get hurt.[citation needed] Rock-a-bye as a phrase apparently was first recorded in 1805. The nursery rhyme suggests a falling, apparently related to a terrible accident in 1706 where the Earl of Sandwich's son was tossed without warning from his cradle. The cradle was later found in the Thames River empty and alone.
Another source reports that Effie Crockett, a relative of Davy Crockett, wrote the lyrics in 1872 while babysitting a restless child.[citation needed]
In Derbyshire, England, local legend has it that the song relates to a local character in the late 1700s, Betty Kenny (Kate Kenyon), who lived with her charcoal-burner husband, Luke, and their eight children in a huge yew tree in Shining Cliff Woods in the Derwent Valley, where a hollowed-out bough served as a cradle. [1]
Yet another theory has it that the song, like "Lilliburlero", refers to events immediately preceding the "Glorious Revolution". The baby is supposed to be the son of King James II of England, who was widely believed to be someone else's child smuggled into the birthing room in order to provide a Catholic heir for James. The "wind" may be that political "wind" or force "blowing" or coming from the Netherlands bringing James' nephew and son-in-law, William III of England, a.k.a. William of Orange, who would eventually depose King James II in the revolution. The "cradle" is the House of Stuart monarchy."
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Rock-a-bye_Baby
Do the minutes on the movie boxes include the previews, credits, and special features, or just the movie itself?
Movie running time including credits.
What does PU stand for (as in "PU, that stinks!")?
Nothing, actually...
"P.U. is a stylized abbreviation that stands for the sound of disgust ("pew!" or "pee-you!") that one might say upon smelling something rotten. It was often used in popular culture such as Warner Brothers cartoons. Bugs Bunny, Daffy Duck or Porky Pig might say it in an appropriate situation. It was taken to a logical absurdity in the cartoon The Dover Boys, in which their college was described by the narrator as "Pimento University... Pimento U... good ol' P.U."."
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/P.U.
What is the stage of a reptile when it has eggs in it but they haven't been laid. Are they pregnant?
You can say pregnant, but the technical or scientific term is "gravid."
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If Mars had earthquakes would they be called marsquakes?
There may be Marsquakes (http://www.abc.net.au/science/news/stories/2005/1464931.htm), there are Moonquakes (http://science.nasa.gov/headlines/y2006/15mar_moonquakes.htm).
Can a black person join the kkk?
[:)]
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" The decision to classify certain fruits as vegetables was officially resolved in 1893 when the Supreme Court unanimously decided the tomato was a vegetable, "
Not on this side of the pond I believe. Tomatoes are classed as fruit so the Belgians can put them in jam.
The botanists (to whom the question actually matters) classsify it , I believe, as a berry.
This leads to the silly question about where, on a transatlantic flight, do they change status?
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Here is a few intropective questions I posed for myself.
What was the happiest moment of your life? (when I met my wife and fell in love)
The saddest? (believe it or not when my little 17 year old beloved dog died)
Who was the most important person in your life? (my father)
Who has been the biggest influence on your life? (my father)
Who has been the kindest to you in your life? (My wife, children one friend and mother)
What are the most important lessons you’ve learned in life? (To keep quite and listen)
What is your earliest memory? (Someone cooking a large bird in a three legged pot, maybe 3 yrs)
Are there any words of wisdom you’d like to pass along. (likedo to others as you would others do to you)
What are you proudest of in your life? (birth of my first child)
When in life have you felt most alone? (In the utter depth of manic depression)
How has your life been different than what you’d imagined? (one letter changed the whole course of my life leading to me becoming an engineer)
How would you like to be remembered? (as a loving father, son friend and brother)
Do you have any regrets? (yes I would have liked to become a professional astronomer)
What does your future hold? (Not much I am near the end maybe heaven)
Is there anything that ever told but want to reveal now (no maybe I will tell God)