The Naked Scientists

The Naked Scientists Forum

Author Topic: Computer related jokes  (Read 29340 times)

Offline i am bored

  • Hero Member
  • *****
  • Posts: 927
    • View Profile
Computer related jokes
« Reply #25 on: 28/03/2008 00:22:26 »
it means: if you can read this you have no life
 

Offline Simulated

  • Neilep Level Member
  • ******
  • Posts: 7188
  • Thanked: 1 times
  • Simulated..What more do you needa know :P
    • View Profile
    • Facebook
Computer related jokes
« Reply #26 on: 28/03/2008 01:39:18 »
darn i shoulda figured you'd say something like that
 

Offline science_guy

  • Hero Member
  • *****
  • Posts: 701
  • I'm right there... inside neilep's head!
    • View Profile
Computer related jokes
« Reply #27 on: 02/04/2008 05:36:22 »
umm... I got 38 characters total (I dont know binary, so I cant go farther than that) and two of them are cut off, so I cant even get those if I did know binary
 

Offline science_guy

  • Hero Member
  • *****
  • Posts: 701
  • I'm right there... inside neilep's head!
    • View Profile
Computer related jokes
« Reply #28 on: 02/04/2008 05:41:13 »
oh... wait... I replied too late... why didn't I notice that?
 

Offline Bored chemist

  • Neilep Level Member
  • ******
  • Posts: 8676
  • Thanked: 42 times
    • View Profile
Computer related jokes
« Reply #29 on: 02/04/2008 18:55:16 »
" need to know what size bytes to split it into."
Byte is a contraction of  "by eights" or at least that's what I was told. 4 bits is a nybble.
 

Offline i am bored

  • Hero Member
  • *****
  • Posts: 927
    • View Profile
Computer related jokes
« Reply #30 on: 02/04/2008 21:17:54 »
oh i just used a text to binary converter
 

Offline Nobody's Confidant

  • Neilep Level Member
  • ******
  • Posts: 1802
  • So loud silence can be.
    • View Profile
Computer related jokes
« Reply #31 on: 03/04/2008 17:39:38 »
oh i just used a text to binary converter
How did you find one of those?
 

Offline Make it Lady

  • Neilep Level Member
  • ******
  • Posts: 4050
  • Hands-on fun for everyone!
    • View Profile
Computer related jokes
« Reply #32 on: 03/04/2008 18:18:46 »
" need to know what size bytes to split it into."
Byte is a contraction of  "by eights" or at least that's what I was told. 4 bits is a nybble.

Bytes, Nybbles stop it I'm on a diet!
 

Offline Bored chemist

  • Neilep Level Member
  • ******
  • Posts: 8676
  • Thanked: 42 times
    • View Profile
Computer related jokes
« Reply #33 on: 03/04/2008 18:49:58 »
 I have a nasty feeling that the combination of information theory, the thermodynamics of entropy and a reasonable assumption about your temperature would permit one to calculate the number of Calories in a byte.
 

Offline Make it Lady

  • Neilep Level Member
  • ******
  • Posts: 4050
  • Hands-on fun for everyone!
    • View Profile
Computer related jokes
« Reply #34 on: 03/04/2008 19:47:17 »
Oh I love it when a man speaks physical chemistry to me.
 

Offline i am bored

  • Hero Member
  • *****
  • Posts: 927
    • View Profile
 

Offline Nobody's Confidant

  • Neilep Level Member
  • ******
  • Posts: 1802
  • So loud silence can be.
    • View Profile
Computer related jokes
« Reply #36 on: 04/04/2008 13:41:15 »
oh i just used a text to binary converter
How did you find one of those?

http://www.roubaixinteractive.com/PlayGround/Binary_Conversion/Binary_To_Text.asp
01111001011011110111010100100000011010000110000101110110011001010010000001110100011011110110111100100000011011010111010101100011011010000010000001100110011100100110010101100101001000000111010001101001011011010110010100101110
« Last Edit: 04/04/2008 13:43:45 by Nobody's Confidant »
 

Offline Make it Lady

  • Neilep Level Member
  • ******
  • Posts: 4050
  • Hands-on fun for everyone!
    • View Profile
Computer related jokes
« Reply #37 on: 04/04/2008 17:11:28 »
I think I have created a monster (no that isn't what it says, it is what I've done)
 

Offline Nobody's Confidant

  • Neilep Level Member
  • ******
  • Posts: 1802
  • So loud silence can be.
    • View Profile
Computer related jokes
« Reply #38 on: 04/04/2008 17:18:29 »
I think I have created a monster (no that isn't what it says, it is what I've done)
Nah, Nic was a monster long before this.
 

Offline i am bored

  • Hero Member
  • *****
  • Posts: 927
    • View Profile
Computer related jokes
« Reply #39 on: 04/04/2008 23:34:23 »
01110111011001010010000001110011011010000110111101110101011011000110010000100000011001000110111100100000011000010010000001110100011010000111001001100 10101100001011001000010000001100011011011110110110101110000011011000110010101110100011001010110110001111001001000000110100101101110001000000110001001 10100101101110011000010111001001111001
 

Offline Bored chemist

  • Neilep Level Member
  • ******
  • Posts: 8676
  • Thanked: 42 times
    • View Profile
Computer related jokes
« Reply #40 on: 05/04/2008 01:15:12 »
"Oh I love it when a man speaks physical chemistry to me."
Alas, it seems the chemistry is more theoretical than physical. :-)
 

another_someone

  • Guest
Computer related jokes
« Reply #41 on: 05/04/2008 02:35:40 »
" need to know what size bytes to split it into."
Byte is a contraction of  "by eights" or at least that's what I was told. 4 bits is a nybble.

Bytes are normally eight bits (most standards prefer to use the word 'octet' in preference to the term byte), but I think the confusion here is the use of the term byte where I think what was intended was 'character' - and a character can be anything from about 5 bits (old Teletype coding), 6 bits used by ICL machines, 7 bit standard ASCII (although usually encoded in octets, with the eighth bit being a parity or zero), or up to 32 bit unicode (or even variable length with UTF8 encoding).
 

Offline Nobody's Confidant

  • Neilep Level Member
  • ******
  • Posts: 1802
  • So loud silence can be.
    • View Profile
Computer related jokes
« Reply #42 on: 07/04/2008 17:28:27 »
01101110011000010110000101100001011000010110000101100001011000010110100000101110
011101110110010100100000011100110110100001101111011101010110110001100100001000000110010001101111001000000110000100100000011101000110100001110010011001010110000101100100001000000110001101101111011011010111000001101100011001010111010001100101011011000111100100100000011010010110111000100000011000100110100101101110011000010111001001111001
 

Offline science_guy

  • Hero Member
  • *****
  • Posts: 701
  • I'm right there... inside neilep's head!
    • View Profile
Computer related jokes
« Reply #43 on: 20/04/2008 04:22:05 »
1110100010101101010111000101011010100101010101001010101001010101101010101010100111101010001010010110100101001?

 :D
 

Offline Nobody's Confidant

  • Neilep Level Member
  • ******
  • Posts: 1802
  • So loud silence can be.
    • View Profile
Computer related jokes
« Reply #44 on: 21/04/2008 17:52:14 »
1110100010101101010111000101011010100101010101001010101001010101101010101010100111101010001010010110100101001?

 :D
Translator won't work, what does that say?
 

Offline LeeE

  • Neilep Level Member
  • ******
  • Posts: 3382
    • View Profile
    • Spatial
Computer related jokes
« Reply #45 on: 21/04/2008 19:09:48 »
A systems programmer, a computer operator and a hardware engineer all apply for the same job vacancy and as part of the recruitment process they're given a test.  Each is given two perfect spheres, both about ten inches across, and they are then put in to a sealed room and told that they have an hour to come up with something using the the two spheres.

After an hour, the testers first look in on the systems programmer and see that he has one of the spheres precariously balanced upon the other.  The programmer is constantly flapping his hands around the upper sphere, wafting it back into wobbly balance.

In the next room the testers look in on the computer operator.  He's fast asleep, with his feet up on one sphere and his head resting on the other.

When they finally look in the third room there is just the hardware engineer - no sign at all of the two spheres.  "Well.." said the engineer "...sorry, but I lost one and broke the other"
 

Offline Raven

  • Jr. Member
  • **
  • Posts: 19
    • View Profile
Computer related jokes
« Reply #46 on: 21/04/2008 19:47:11 »
01001110011011110111011100100000011101000110100001101001011100110010000001101001011100110010000001110000011001010111001001100110011001010110001101110 10000100000011001100110111101110010001000000110000100100000011101000110100001110010011001010110000101100100001000000110100101101110001000000110000100 10000001100110011011110111001001110101011011010010000001110100011010010111010001101100011001010110010000100000010001110110010101100101011010110010000 00101001101110000011001010110000101101011
 

Offline i am bored

  • Hero Member
  • *****
  • Posts: 927
    • View Profile
Computer related jokes
« Reply #47 on: 22/04/2008 01:19:07 »
0111100101100101011000010110100000100000011010010010000001101011011011100110111101110111
 

Offline DoctorBeaver

  • Naked Science Forum GOD!
  • *******
  • Posts: 12656
  • Thanked: 3 times
  • A stitch in time would have confused Einstein.
    • View Profile
Computer related jokes
« Reply #48 on: 22/04/2008 08:01:24 »
Nice 1, LeeE  :D
 

Offline Nobody's Confidant

  • Neilep Level Member
  • ******
  • Posts: 1802
  • So loud silence can be.
    • View Profile
Computer related jokes
« Reply #49 on: 22/04/2008 13:45:54 »
01001110011011110111011100100000011101000110100001101001011100110010000001101001011100110010000001110000011001010111001001100110011001010110001101110100001000000110011001101111011100100010000001100001001000000111010001101000011100100110010101100001011001000010000001101001011011100010000001100001001000000110011001101111011100100111010101101101001000000111010001101001011101000110110001100101011001000010000001000111011001010110010101101011001000000101001101110000011001010110000101101011
01001001011011100110010001100101011001010110010000100000011010010111010000100000011010010111001100101110
 

The Naked Scientists Forum

Computer related jokes
« Reply #49 on: 22/04/2008 13:45:54 »

 

SMF 2.0.10 | SMF © 2015, Simple Machines
SMFAds for Free Forums