The Naked Scientists

The Naked Scientists Forum

Author Topic: Bad joke  (Read 7555 times)

Offline DoctorBeaver

  • Naked Science Forum GOD!
  • *******
  • Posts: 12656
  • Thanked: 3 times
  • A stitch in time would have confused Einstein.
    • View Profile
Bad joke
« on: 08/04/2008 20:13:51 »
Little boy squashes a butterfly. His dad says "No butter for a month!"

Next day, little boy squashes a honeybee. His dad says "No honey for a month!"

Just then the little boy's mother arrives and treads on a cockroach. Little boy turns to his dad and asks "Are you going to tell her or shall I?"


 

Offline Carolyn

  • Neilep Level Member
  • ******
  • Posts: 3761
    • View Profile
Bad joke
« Reply #1 on: 08/04/2008 20:21:00 »
 

Offline Karen W.

  • Moderator
  • Naked Science Forum GOD!
  • *****
  • Posts: 31653
  • Thanked: 5 times
  • "come fly with me"
    • View Profile
Bad joke
« Reply #2 on: 08/04/2008 20:23:18 »
LOL LOL LOL!!! Hee hee hee!
 

Offline Make it Lady

  • Neilep Level Member
  • ******
  • Posts: 4050
  • Hands-on fun for everyone!
    • View Profile
Bad joke
« Reply #3 on: 08/04/2008 20:33:00 »
No Roach for a month....I love that fish!!!
 

Offline Karen W.

  • Moderator
  • Naked Science Forum GOD!
  • *****
  • Posts: 31653
  • Thanked: 5 times
  • "come fly with me"
    • View Profile
Bad joke
« Reply #4 on: 08/04/2008 20:38:43 »
LOL...
 

Offline Seany

  • Neilep Level Member
  • ******
  • Posts: 4209
  • Live your life to the full!
    • View Profile
Bad joke
« Reply #5 on: 09/04/2008 00:48:17 »
LOL LOL I get it ;D
 

Offline Karen W.

  • Moderator
  • Naked Science Forum GOD!
  • *****
  • Posts: 31653
  • Thanked: 5 times
  • "come fly with me"
    • View Profile
Bad joke
« Reply #6 on: 09/04/2008 02:51:09 »
Glad you got it! LOL..

Bad Doc... Bad doc.. Hee Hee....
 

Offline Seany

  • Neilep Level Member
  • ******
  • Posts: 4209
  • Live your life to the full!
    • View Profile
Bad joke
« Reply #7 on: 09/04/2008 10:37:12 »
Nope it was good. I shall use it in school ;D
 

Offline Nobody's Confidant

  • Neilep Level Member
  • ******
  • Posts: 1802
  • So loud silence can be.
    • View Profile
Bad joke
« Reply #8 on: 09/04/2008 13:50:31 »
Little boy squashes a butterfly. His dad says "No butter for a month!"

Next day, little boy squashes a honeybee. His dad says "No honey for a month!"

Just then the little boy's mother arrives and treads on a cockroach. Little boy turns to his dad and asks "Are you going to tell her or shall I?"
*blinks*
Missed it.
 

Offline Karen W.

  • Moderator
  • Naked Science Forum GOD!
  • *****
  • Posts: 31653
  • Thanked: 5 times
  • "come fly with me"
    • View Profile
Bad joke
« Reply #9 on: 09/04/2008 18:59:55 »
Read it again Ben!!
 

Offline Seany

  • Neilep Level Member
  • ******
  • Posts: 4209
  • Live your life to the full!
    • View Profile
Bad joke
« Reply #10 on: 09/04/2008 19:26:09 »
LOL do you REALLY not get it?
 

Offline Nobody's Confidant

  • Neilep Level Member
  • ******
  • Posts: 1802
  • So loud silence can be.
    • View Profile
Bad joke
« Reply #11 on: 10/04/2008 13:46:25 »
I get it now. It's bad in more ways than one.
 

Offline JimBob

  • Global Moderator
  • Neilep Level Member
  • *****
  • Posts: 6564
  • Thanked: 7 times
  • Moderator
    • View Profile
Bad joke
« Reply #12 on: 10/04/2008 17:50:24 »
Yep. Doctor Beaver does have bad mind - deranges is more to the point.
 

Offline DoctorBeaver

  • Naked Science Forum GOD!
  • *******
  • Posts: 12656
  • Thanked: 3 times
  • A stitch in time would have confused Einstein.
    • View Profile
Bad joke
« Reply #13 on: 10/04/2008 23:13:09 »
Yep. Doctor Beaver does have bad mind - deranges is more to the point.

And deranged
 

Offline JimBob

  • Global Moderator
  • Neilep Level Member
  • *****
  • Posts: 6564
  • Thanked: 7 times
  • Moderator
    • View Profile
Bad joke
« Reply #14 on: 11/04/2008 01:13:11 »
the "d" key is next to the "s" key on the US keyboard layout. Just a typo.
 

Offline DoctorBeaver

  • Naked Science Forum GOD!
  • *******
  • Posts: 12656
  • Thanked: 3 times
  • A stitch in time would have confused Einstein.
    • View Profile
Bad joke
« Reply #15 on: 11/04/2008 08:50:36 »
the "d" key is next to the "s" key on the US keyboard layout.

As is the case with all QWERTY keyboards.
 

Offline Nobody's Confidant

  • Neilep Level Member
  • ******
  • Posts: 1802
  • So loud silence can be.
    • View Profile
Bad joke
« Reply #16 on: 11/04/2008 13:12:39 »
the "d" key is next to the "s" key on the US keyboard layout. Just a typo.
Isn't it that way everywhere?
 

Offline DoctorBeaver

  • Naked Science Forum GOD!
  • *******
  • Posts: 12656
  • Thanked: 3 times
  • A stitch in time would have confused Einstein.
    • View Profile
Bad joke
« Reply #17 on: 11/04/2008 14:50:52 »
the "d" key is next to the "s" key on the US keyboard layout. Just a typo.
Isn't it that way everywhere?

Not, for example, on Arabic, Hebrew, Chinese, Japanese, Korean, Russian or Greek keyboards. That's why I said QWERTY keyboards.
 

Offline Nobody's Confidant

  • Neilep Level Member
  • ******
  • Posts: 1802
  • So loud silence can be.
    • View Profile
Bad joke
« Reply #18 on: 11/04/2008 16:34:08 »
the "d" key is next to the "s" key on the US keyboard layout. Just a typo.
Isn't it that way everywhere?

Not, for example, on Arabic, Hebrew, Chinese, Japanese, Korean, Russian or Greek keyboards. That's why I said QWERTY keyboards.
Oh okay.
 

Offline JimBob

  • Global Moderator
  • Neilep Level Member
  • *****
  • Posts: 6564
  • Thanked: 7 times
  • Moderator
    • View Profile
Bad joke
« Reply #19 on: 12/04/2008 01:37:13 »
Little Harry was sitting on a park bench, munching on one candy bar after another.

After the 6th bar, a man on the bench across from him said, 'Son, you know eating all that candy isn't good for you. It will give you acne, rot your teeth, and make you fat.'

Little Harry replied, 'My grandfather lived to be 107 years old.'

The man asked, 'Did your grandfather eat 6 candy bars at a time'?

Little Harry answered, 'No, he just minded his own f***in' business.


From another moderator - you know who you are!
 

Offline DoctorBeaver

  • Naked Science Forum GOD!
  • *******
  • Posts: 12656
  • Thanked: 3 times
  • A stitch in time would have confused Einstein.
    • View Profile
Bad joke
« Reply #20 on: 12/04/2008 07:47:23 »
 [:0]
 

Offline Carolyn

  • Neilep Level Member
  • ******
  • Posts: 3761
    • View Profile
Bad joke
« Reply #21 on: 12/04/2008 15:33:20 »
Little Harry was sitting on a park bench, munching on one candy bar after another.

After the 6th bar, a man on the bench across from him said, 'Son, you know eating all that candy isn't good for you. It will give you acne, rot your teeth, and make you fat.'

Little Harry replied, 'My grandfather lived to be 107 years old.'

The man asked, 'Did your grandfather eat 6 candy bars at a time'?

Little Harry answered, 'No, he just minded his own f***in' business.


From another moderator - you know who you are!

LOL...something like that actually happened to me a LONG LONG time ago.

I was working as an office manager for a legislative reporting agency and we were in the middle of the legislative session.  I was working long hours and was very stressed.  I went outside to smoke a cigarette and this busy body b**** that I had never met walked up to me and started berating me about smoking!  She gave me hell!  Gave me a long list of reasons why smoking was a terrible and low class thing to do ending with it being bad for my health.  I just glared at her and then very calmly said "Smoking isn't nearly as dangerous as sticking your nose in my f****** business!"  She practically ran away. 

After I got my nicotine fix I felt terrible and wanted to apologize but I never saw her again. 
 

Offline DoctorBeaver

  • Naked Science Forum GOD!
  • *******
  • Posts: 12656
  • Thanked: 3 times
  • A stitch in time would have confused Einstein.
    • View Profile
Bad joke
« Reply #22 on: 12/04/2008 16:33:53 »
Good for you. And you shouoldn't have even considered apologising to her. People who poke unwanted noses into my business get very short shrift from me - "Get your nose out or I'll bite it off!"

I got so sick of "No smoking day", "No drinking day", "Smile day" that I declared a "Mind your own effin' business day".
 

Offline Carolyn

  • Neilep Level Member
  • ******
  • Posts: 3761
    • View Profile
Bad joke
« Reply #23 on: 12/04/2008 17:47:07 »
Good for you. And you shouoldn't have even considered apologising to her. People who poke unwanted noses into my business get very short shrift from me - "Get your nose out or I'll bite it off!"

I got so sick of "No smoking day", "No drinking day", "Smile day" that I declared a "Mind your own effin' business day".

LOVE IT!!!  It should be declared a legal holiday!  We should have T-shirts made!
 

Offline Carolyn

  • Neilep Level Member
  • ******
  • Posts: 3761
    • View Profile
Bad joke
« Reply #24 on: 12/04/2008 17:48:06 »
The Cop and The Drunk!

A drunk walks out of a bar with a key in his hand and he is stumbling back and forth.

A cop on the beat sees him and approaches .. 'Can I help you sir?'

'Yessh! Ssssomebody ssstole my carrr,' ... the man replies.

The cop asks . . . . 'Where was your car the last time you saw it?'

'It wasss on the end of thisshh key,' the man replies.

About that time the cop looks down and sees the man's wiener hanging out of his fly for all the world to see.

He asks the man, 'Sir, are you aware that you are exposing yourself?'

Momentarily confused, the drunk looks down at his crotch and without missing a beat, blurts out . . . .

'I'll be damned . . . . . . . . My girlfriend's gone, too!!!
 

The Naked Scientists Forum

Bad joke
« Reply #24 on: 12/04/2008 17:48:06 »

 

SMF 2.0.10 | SMF © 2015, Simple Machines
SMFAds for Free Forums