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Author Topic: How Many Sperms are In A Typical Ejaculate?  (Read 10983 times)

Offline neilep

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How Many Sperms are In A Typical Ejaculate?
« on: 16/09/2008 12:42:26 »
Dear Degree Accomplishers In Spermology,

As a sheepy I am course always interested in the nature of sperm.

From what I understand though it is actually not so easy for a girlie to get preggy.

Is it possible to work out the odds of conception ?..is there a mathematical formula.Presumably the number of sperm must attribute to the odds yes ?

so, how many sperm are in a typical ejaculate ? and although only one eventually does the deed, how many actually make it to the egg ?..or in other words how many don't make it anywhere close ?, and so what I really want to know is based on those figures, what are the odds of in fact one sperm doing the deed taking into consideration that it might take a number of tries and therefore the number of sperm increases  with each attempt !

Look here's some and they seem pretty stupid, despite the obvious wanton wench that the eggy is ?




Thank ewe



neil
Executive Officer In Charge Of Asking The Above Question

mwah mwah mwah mwah
xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

« Last Edit: 21/11/2015 14:19:19 by chris »


 

Offline Karen W.

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LOL LOL.. I have heard statistics on these questions you ask and the answer still evades my very forgetful mind.. sorry Neily... but love the the detailed little spermy talk! LOL!
 

Offline Karen W.

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Its looking like there are  Upwards of 100 million sperm expelled when a man ejaculates. I assume it takes one good swimmer to do the deed although I could be wrong...and I don't know the odds!
 

Offline neilep

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Its looking like there are  Upwards of 100 million sperm expelled when a man ejaculates. I assume it takes one good swimmer to do the deed although I could be wrong...and I don't know the odds!

Thanks Karen....I think I may have over elaborated my question with all mu ususal banal nonsence....When ewe take into consideration the average number of " acts " it takes to make one of ewe girlies preggy and multiply that by all the spermywermy I am sure the average odds are out there somewhere !
 

Offline Karen W.

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I am sure they are but some "girlies" get preggy with just a breath of warm air blown on their neck.. I swear!... LOL..Then others take years Like me! It took me four years in between my daughter and my eldest son.. and we never used any birth control but nothing ... nodda!
 

Offline Don_1

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Don't worry Neil, I'll have the answer for you in a while.

one, two, three, four, five, (oh no, what comes after five???) eleven, twelve, fifteen, sexteen (hehehehe) eighteen (old enough now), twenty

I hope you don't want this figure to be too accurate.

Now where was I, Oh yes, thirty eleven, thirty twelve.....................................................................................
 

Offline neilep

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Don't worry Neil, I'll have the answer for you in a while.

one, two, three, four, five, (oh no, what comes after five???) eleven, twelve, fifteen, sexteen (hehehehe) eighteen (old enough now), twenty

I hope you don't want this figure to be too accurate.

Now where was I, Oh yes, thirty eleven, thirty twelve.....................................................................................

 

Offline Don_1

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Three thousand four hundred and seventy two,
three thousand four hundred and seventy three






OH DAMN AND BLAST, NOW YOU MADE LOOSE MY PLACE, PLEASE DON'T INTERUPT AGAIN

One, two, three, four, five, (Takes mitten off other hand) seven, nine, six, fourteen, fiveteen, (takes off shoes & socks) twenteen, twenteen one, twenteen three, eleventy four, twelvty five, twelvty six........
 

Offline RD

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Once a sperm reaches the egg, (egg is fertilized), the egg puts up a barrier to prevent entry by other sperm (to prevent polyspermy).
 

Offline Don_1

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.................................................... eight million two hundred & thirty nine thousand seven hundred & thirty five,

KEEP BLOODY STILL WILL YOU!!!

Now where was I, ah yes, thirty nine million eight hundred thousand six hundred and sevvvwenteeeeee Aawwwwwwwww, ZZZZZZZZZZzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz 
 

Offline Don_1

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zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz Urh, erm fifty eight million six hundred & twelvty ten thousand ten hundred aaannnnndd shishtyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy ZZZZZZZZZzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz
 

Offline Don_1

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zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZ Oh! is anyone looking  [?] nope, good I'll just flush this lot down the loo

AH!!! Right I have an answer for you, 90 million give or take a few hundred, sheesh talk about a hammer to crack a nut!!!! This is more like a pile driver to crush a grape!!!!
 

Offline neilep

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zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz Urh, erm fifty eight million six hundred & twelvty ten thousand ten hundred aaannnnndd shishtyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy ZZZZZZZZZzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz

*shouts out*...FIFTY EIGHT, NINETY THREE, FORTY SEVEN !! SEVENTY FIVE !
 

Offline neilep

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zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZ Oh! is anyone looking  [?] nope, good I'll just flush this lot down the loo

AH!!! Right I have an answer for you, 90 million give or take a few hundred, sheesh talk about a hammer to crack a nut!!!! This is more like a pile driver to crush a grape!!!!

90 million eh?..are ewe sure ?...better check !..Karen said one hundred million !
 

Offline Don_1

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 :( one, two, three, four, five, six..........................................
 

Offline neilep

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:( one, two, three, four, five, six..........................................

*hugs the Don*


Ok...lets settle on 95 miilion little swimmers in each portion of man milk.....and just say for example that it takes 5 times to get a girly preggy , that's 475 million to one yes ?

In my very rough understanding of odds, the chances of anyone of us being here are very slim yes ? Presumably the next boy sperm would have made not me but someone else !..or I could have been a girly...and a right looker too !!

so, we're all pretty fortunate aren't we ?

With that in mind , I think it makes the chances (although slim) of winning the lottery even better !..I think it's 14 million to 1 (UK) !


With that in mind...shall I buy a ticket ?
 

Offline RD

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If you buy as many lottery tickets as there are sperm in ejaculate, then you are likely to win.

To paraphrase Dr Samuel Johnson: National lotteries are a tax on daftness.
 

Offline Make it Lady

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Did you know that ice down the undercrunchers before sex gives a higher likelihood of girl babies as the sperm slow down and swim slowly. The male sperm live short lives and so die before they reach the egg. Girl sperms live longer and reach the egg before dying.
If you want a boy get wifey to do a shoulder stand after sex. Gravity assists the faster swimming male sperm to reach the egg before the slower but more long lived girlies.
 

Offline neilep

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If you buy as many lottery tickets as there are sperm in ejaculate, then you are likely to win.

To paraphrase Dr Samuel Johnson: National lotteries are a tax on daftness.


yes, yes this is true but when ewe consider how unikely it is that we are here in the first place .....then the chances of winning the lottery improves !!..well...there is an ambiance of increased chance perhaps !


*DOH !..it's not gonna happen is it ?*
 

Offline neilep

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Did you know that ice down the undercrunchers before sex gives a higher likelihood of girl babies as the sperm slow down and swim slowly. The male sperm live short lives and so die before they reach the egg. Girl sperms live longer and reach the egg before dying.
If you want a boy get wifey to do a shoulder stand after sex. Gravity assists the faster swimming male sperm to reach the egg before the slower but more long lived girlies.


No, I did not know that sticking my joy department in the freezer will aid in the nurture of female offspring ?

I find it fascinating that just like humans, male sperm swim/run faster and live shorter !........fancy that !
 

Offline RD

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Quote
Fatherís Occupation

Although the sex ratio averages out everywhere to 106 boys for every 100 girls, researchers have found that men in some occupational groups have a tendency to have more girls. Some studies have found that airline pilots, astronauts and deep sea divers have more girls. Recently, workers in timber mills have been shown to have more daughters.
http://www.sexratio.com/facts.htm

If these occupations all entail cold working conditions it would support Make It Lady's assertion.

(Temperature dependent sex selection does occur in other species)

If temperature does determine human gender, then there should be a seasonal pattern (away from the equator),
 e.g. in autumn more girls born than boys, as these children were conceived in winter.

Quote
Season of child's birth, however, significantly affected the sex ratio [in Canada]
http://findarticles.com/p/articles/mi_qa3659/is_/ai_n8865608
« Last Edit: 18/09/2008 03:42:21 by RD »
 

Offline Don_1

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Isnít this all rather taking the fun out of it, letís just get down to a damn good old fashioned bonk.


Just a min, I've just read the post in which you say "90 million eh?..are ewe sure ?...better check !..Karen said one hundred million !" Do you mean to tell me that Karen knew the answer all along and just let me carry on wasting my valuable time? And that raises another question, what was Karen doing counting my tadpoles? How did she get hold of them?

I intend to complain at the highest possible level.
ďJeeves, Jeeves, are there you are Jeeves, bring me my crampons and ice axe, and phone Sherpa Tensing Jnr to tell him Iím on my way.Ē

ďAs you wish my LordĒ.


To:
The highest possible level
# 1 The Peak
Mt. Everest.
Dear Sir, Madam or otherwise,
I wish to complain in the strongest possible terms (muscles @ 23.9% APR) about an infringement of my tadpoles. They have been accosted and counted by Karen. These are MY tadpoles, each and every one of them. I regard them as my kith and kin. Indeed I kith them daily. (Excuthe the lithp it ith due to my bottom lip quivering).

Yourth dithguthted,

Doooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooaghhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh.................



To:
The Highest possible level
#1 The Peak
Mt. Everest.
Dear Sir, Madam or otherwise,
I wish to complain about that first step outside your front door. 29,000 ft is a tad on the steep side.
Might I suggest you contact my local builders (Messers Bodgit & Leggit) to rectify the problem.

Yours with a shattered skeleton,

Don 1
 

Offline Karen W.

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Did you know that ice down the undercrunchers before sex gives a higher likelihood of girl babies as the sperm slow down and swim slowly. The male sperm live short lives and so die before they reach the egg. Girl sperms live longer and reach the egg before dying.
If you want a boy get wifey to do a shoulder stand after sex. Gravity assists the faster swimming male sperm to reach the egg before the slower but more long lived girlies.

Well thats the answer then.. I wondered why I got two Boys and only one girl it was those danged old bicycle exercises after sex that was doing it! or maybe it was that sexual position number...........hummmmmm I have to get out my book! Me forgets what number it was.. been too long and the brain has become foggy and forgetful! LOL!
 

Offline Karen W.

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Isnít this all rather taking the fun out of it, letís just get down to a damn good old fashioned bonk.


Just a min, I've just read the post in which you say "90 million eh?..are ewe sure ?...better check !..Karen said one hundred million !" Do you mean to tell me that Karen knew the answer all along and just let me carry on wasting my valuable time? And that raises another question, what was Karen doing counting my tadpoles? How did she get hold of them?

I intend to complain at the highest possible level.
ďJeeves, Jeeves, are there you are Jeeves, bring me my crampons and ice axe, and phone Sherpa Tensing Jnr to tell him Iím on my way.Ē

ďAs you wish my LordĒ.


To:
The highest possible level
# 1 The Peak
Mt. Everest.
Dear Sir, Madam or otherwise,
I wish to complain in the strongest possible terms (muscles @ 23.9% APR) about an infringement of my tadpoles. They have been accosted and counted by Karen. These are MY tadpoles, each and every one of them. I regard them as my kith and kin. Indeed I kith them daily. (Excuthe the lithp it ith due to my bottom lip quivering).

Yourth dithguthted,

Doooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooaghhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh.................



To:
The Highest possible level
#1 The Peak
Mt. Everest.
Dear Sir, Madam or otherwise,
I wish to complain about that first step outside your front door. 29,000 ft is a tad on the steep side.
Might I suggest you contact my local builders (Messers Bodgit & Leggit) to rectify the problem.

Yours with a shattered skeleton,

Don 1


I wouldn't have to count your Tadpoles if you kept them secured where they belong!! Its not like we have lots of sheepies here to be counting in order to get some winks!! Honestly It would take me a week to count your 90 million little wiggly guys and gals in an effort to come to a unquestioned 1 million, or to go to sleep, which ever comes first! LOL... Me and math says I will sleep first! LOL
 

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