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Author Topic: Attraction in relation to appearance  (Read 49066 times)

jolly

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Attraction in relation to appearance
« Reply #25 on: 06/05/2007 20:01:02 »
I would argue that attraction is in the eye of the beholder....
 
And as a result it's down to each individual....

However when you look at the past- in roman times fat women were considered atractive.....

This is because it is claimed- that fat women could only be fat if they ate a lot and were therefore rich.....

So people found wealth attractive or symbols of wealth attractive.....

As today with plastic surgery.... Thin people are generally considered atractive... and they are also generally rich as they pay for it!

I would argue that the rich have the money to force opinion in their direction....

Or others who want to be rich push that opinion...

But really it is down to the individual what they find attractive....

There are again problems with people who through mental illness or social exclusion........

Homosexualality an example of social exclusion can lead people who avoid their true feelings to lead a life celibacy like kennith williams...

There are of course other examples where you open a magazine and dont find any of the women atractive- err Benny hill in 'the italian job' finds fat women attractive.... who knows why?

Really I find, as many of my friends do- almost all women attractive... black, white, fat, thin, tall, short... There female.lol

But I need more than just psyical attraction...

I dont know that there is a set or standard rule when it comes to what people like. It is in the end down to them.....

With regards to metal health some people find the dead attractive... or rings... or sheep... or trees... there was this guy in the paper who used to play with his car down the woods.lol
But these really are a simptoms of some mental health problem.... maybe brain damage or the kid was raised by sheep who knows...lol
Its not till you talk to them about why they find that stuff attractive you can being to understand where it comes from.

So really it is down to you, dont rely on mags you need to think for yourself, and follow your own feelings. I mean if you find someone attractive and all your friends think she is ugly....
What you gonna do? Do you live for them or yourself?       

Sadly many people will reject the person they like due to- social presures.
The Earl that wont marry his maid... Or the politician that wont come out the closit.... or the guy who wont go out with her coz she's poor.... or comes from a bad family... or she not jewish or muslim, or christian etc etc.... sad really!   

to repeat- So people found wealth attractive or symbols of wealth attractive..... In this situation if someone go's for a symbol then what are they really going for- certainly not the person... and eventually that relationship will fall apart!

I suppose what I'm getting at there is that if you allow the concerns of others to affect your decision about who you are with... then really the person you end up with is not the person you really want to be with.

Sadly in todays world its all about image, and not feelings! If you put others opinions before yourself when it comes to love, your going now where but to a place of either sadness or a little not that happy contentment- an its my lot attitude- its not great but I can live with it!
Why settle for that- Live for yourself and go find someone you like! and can actually be happy with! 
« Last Edit: 06/05/2007 20:21:04 by jolly »
 

Offline Karen W.

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Attraction in relation to appearance
« Reply #26 on: 06/05/2007 20:56:07 »
Nice Post Jolly!
 

jolly

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Attraction in relation to appearance
« Reply #27 on: 06/05/2007 21:02:07 »
thankyou lady
 

Offline Karen W.

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Attraction in relation to appearance
« Reply #28 on: 06/05/2007 21:09:32 »
Your welcome Jolly. I think it was nice.
 

jolly

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Attraction in relation to appearance
« Reply #29 on: 06/05/2007 22:09:24 »
As an extencion:- I have really only covered the social and psycological area of attraction:

But obviously feramones, and body shape are important- you know the genitic area of attraction-

I think feramones realeased give off indicators of immune system strenght- cant remember where I heard that!

A Six pack relates to verility cant remember how though!

Hips in girls relates to sutibility for carring children!

Errm but really they are add-ons to what draws you to the person in the first place-
Not the starting point afterall you dont smell the person till your up close and you normally see a guys six pack under his shirt-
Men normally see the face first, well depends on the man.lol
Who knows dont forget the spritual side of attraction!
 

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Attraction in relation to appearance
« Reply #30 on: 06/05/2007 22:19:54 »
I have never been attracted to a body  with the exception of what I see when I look into someones eyes.. It is always the eyes where I see what draws me initially along with what they think how they think That is Ultimately the whole thing for me.. Humor fun.. smart funny shy, someone who can give me a run for my money when it comes to talking and a good listner, I have never had that. someone genuinely interested in how I think or even why I think! LOL
 

jolly

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Attraction in relation to appearance
« Reply #31 on: 06/05/2007 22:39:04 »
You need a shrink karen they love all that stuff..lol
 

Offline Ben6789

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Attraction in relation to appearance
« Reply #32 on: 07/05/2007 13:17:20 »
Why do they call em shrinks? ???
 

jolly

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Attraction in relation to appearance
« Reply #33 on: 07/05/2007 13:23:42 »
Because people go in a bit upset but o.k.....

And come out

About 3ft shorter and a bit robotic! 
 

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Attraction in relation to appearance
« Reply #34 on: 07/05/2007 15:17:47 »
OH NO......Does that mean I used to be 8 ft tall!! CRUD!!! I should have never went in.....LOL
 

Offline elegantlywasted

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Attraction in relation to appearance
« Reply #35 on: 07/05/2007 15:22:08 »
But obviously feramones, and body shape are important- you know the genitic area of attraction-

A Six pack relates to verility cant remember how though!

Hips in girls relates to sutibility for carring children!


I don't think a six pack has anything to do with attraction. Personally I find them disgusting!

Women look for men with broad shoulders a sign of protection and a strong hunter. Men on the other hand to look for wider hips, as this means that birthing a child will be easier.

That is the basic caveman attraction guideline. Of course now, there are many more social stigmas with attraction. And because of this it makes it hard to distinguish what people are attracted to.
 

jolly

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Attraction in relation to appearance
« Reply #36 on: 07/05/2007 15:29:15 »
Well if you want a caveman- thats your business!
 

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« Reply #37 on: 07/05/2007 15:29:38 »
I agree with the six pack.. I do not give a darn weather a guy has a six pack..LOL I think the term is stupid..LOL A guy who is funny kind sweet has feelings is not embarrassed by his own emotions and who likes me equally as well.Yes that sounds like a good start! LOL
 

jolly

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Attraction in relation to appearance
« Reply #38 on: 07/05/2007 15:37:38 »
Well some women do like them!

As I said before it's down to you what you like!

and elegantlywasted:
"Women look for men with broad shoulders a sign of protection and a strong hunter."
 
A man told you this right?
« Last Edit: 07/05/2007 15:40:44 by jolly »
 

Offline elegantlywasted

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Attraction in relation to appearance
« Reply #39 on: 07/05/2007 16:17:54 »
Well some women do like them!

As I said before it's down to you what you like!

and elegantlywasted:
"Women look for men with broad shoulders a sign of protection and a strong hunter."
 
A man told you this right?

Actually no, a textbook written by a woman did. It is the same logic behind men looking for a woman who can bear him lots of children, and have ease doing it (ie. broad hips)

And again back to the six packs. If we are discussing what women inherently find attractive, a six pack is not one of them. Even by saying your self that some women like them negates your point that they are important to attractiveness.
 

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« Reply #40 on: 07/05/2007 16:19:18 »
Yes I agree with that. A lot of women are attracted by that as are men to women built like Godesses..but then that would depend on what you deem to be a Godess! LOL
 

Offline Ben6789

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« Reply #41 on: 07/05/2007 16:21:16 »
Meh, too many people in my school depend on looks in a relationship. Maybe that's why i don't have a g/f...

Doesn't matter. I prefer personality, personally.

Oooh, an alliteration.
 

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« Reply #42 on: 07/05/2007 16:22:53 »
People are attracted by different things..

I may be initially attracted by mind eyes etc, but I can also appreciate the broad shoulders and strong arms and such also.. it is just not what I would use to find my perfect someone if I were looking which I am not!!!
 

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« Reply #43 on: 07/05/2007 16:25:39 »
Meh, too many people in my school depend on looks in a relationship. Maybe that's why i don't have a g/f...

Doesn't matter. I prefer personality, personally.

Oooh, an alliteration.

Good for you!! Wise decision.. The right person/girl will come along one day!
 

Offline Ben6789

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« Reply #44 on: 07/05/2007 16:30:15 »
What if i don't want a girl?

Or guy, mine you.
 

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« Reply #45 on: 07/05/2007 16:30:34 »
What I am speaking of is not a conscience decision as to what we find attractive!!! It is simply something that is ingrained in us.

We don't sit on a patio somewhere watching hotties walk by saying "oooh look at the shoulders on that one, I bet he could kill me a boar and build me a rockin' shelter."

And men, well I think, don't sit on that same patio watching the ladies saying, Wow!! Those are some child rearing hips.

It's a Darwinian sort of thing. Of course with all evolution comes an evolution in ideals. Studies have shown that younger women (20-40) prefer a more feminine physique on a man, while older women (40+) prefer a more rugged manly look (broad shoulders, strong jaw).

Call me crazy but I would take George Clooney over Brad Pitt any day!!
 

jolly

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Attraction in relation to appearance
« Reply #46 on: 07/05/2007 16:30:59 »

Actually no, a textbook written by a woman did. It is the same logic behind men looking for a woman who can bear him lots of children, and have ease doing it (ie. broad hips)

And again back to the six packs. If we are discussing what women inherently find attractive, a six pack is not one of them.

Well I do not think that women find anything inherently attractive.... maybe winkies.lol

But really I mean if your gay? what women has a winkie? or broad shoulders and good hunting skills?

Whats your field elegantlywasted?

Actually no, a textbook written by a woman did.
I'm sure a man told her!!!!
« Last Edit: 07/05/2007 16:34:26 by jolly »
 

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Attraction in relation to appearance
« Reply #47 on: 07/05/2007 16:34:58 »
What if i don't want a girl?

Or guy, mine you.

Is there an alternative I don't know about, besides a girl and a guy and celibacy?

 You are Ultimately the only one who knows your own sexual orientation, that is not for anyone else to pass judgement on.. to each his own. Love is love no matter what your orientation.
 

Offline elegantlywasted

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Attraction in relation to appearance
« Reply #48 on: 07/05/2007 16:41:43 »
Quote
Whats your field elegantlywasted?
I am a student.

As for homosexuality, scientifically speaking, it is still a bit of an anomoly. Kinsey did some great research in the field but did not focus on why people did or were attracted to what they were attracted to.

Quote
But really I mean if your gay? what women has a winkie? or broad shoulders and good hunting skills?

My friends and I were discussing this yesterday. A friend of ours, a lesbian, introduced one of us to her new girlfriend. And this new girlfriend looked very masculine. Excuse my crudeness but she was butch. This raised the question, why be a lesbian if you are still attracted to a masculine physique?


 

jolly

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Attraction in relation to appearance
« Reply #49 on: 07/05/2007 16:45:57 »
Well shes your friend ask her!

"I am a student"- of what if you dont mind telling us?
 

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Attraction in relation to appearance
« Reply #49 on: 07/05/2007 16:45:57 »

 

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