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Author Topic: Where is the center (ok - centre)?  (Read 8782 times)

Offline Geezer

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Where is the center (ok - centre)?
« on: 15/11/2009 21:11:36 »
I believe the center of the Universe is actually slap dab in the middle of Milton Keyenes. Can you prove me wrong?


 

Offline Karen W.

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Where is the center (ok - centre)?
« Reply #1 on: 16/11/2009 10:54:17 »
I can't prove you wrong, but I am curious about what the facts are that bring you to this conclusion or belief? LOL...LOL..
 

Offline Don_1

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Where is the center (ok - centre)?
« Reply #2 on: 16/11/2009 12:24:04 »
I believe the center of the Universe is actually slap dab in the middle of Milton Keyenes. Can you prove me wrong?

Yes I can prove you wrong. I was there on Saturday and all I found was my Mrs and our daughter spending loads of dosh in the accursed shopping centre.

Centre of the universe in the middle of Milton Keynes??? No, just a black hole which sucks up money like there's no tomorrow.
 

Offline Geezer

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« Reply #3 on: 16/11/2009 18:43:44 »
I can't prove you wrong, but I am curious about what the facts are that bring you to this conclusion or belief? LOL...LOL..

Well, for a start, its architecture and urban planning are unrivaled. Millions of visitors from all over the Universe are drawn to nearby Neport Pagnell, so it's obvious something is going on.
 

Offline Hadrian

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« Reply #4 on: 16/11/2009 22:44:44 »
ah but the center of Milton Keyenes closed for a half day due to the massive black hole at its core needing repainting.
i did not notices the rest of the universe stopping for a cup of tea so i would say Milton Keyenes is as far form the
center of the universe as Gordon Brown is from being reelected most sexy Brit of the year.
 

Offline Geezer

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« Reply #5 on: 17/11/2009 04:38:38 »
just a black hole which sucks up money like there's no tomorrow.
Well, that would seem to confirm my theory then. A black hole that is capable of arresting time would be a good candidate for the Universal Centerre, or, as they say in France, "Le Centre Universal"
 

Offline Geezer

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« Reply #6 on: 17/11/2009 04:43:30 »
as Gordon Brown is from being reelected most sexy Brit of the year.

Obviously, you have not seen him in his kilt. My goodness, the legs on that man.

Nor have you been down the fabulous M1 too often.
« Last Edit: 17/11/2009 04:49:28 by Geezer »
 

Offline Hadrian

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« Reply #7 on: 17/11/2009 11:29:02 »
as Gordon Brown is from being reelected most sexy Brit of the year.

Obviously, you have not seen him in his kilt. My goodness, the legs on that man.

Nor have you been down the fabulous M1 too often.

is "fabulous M1" an oxymoron?     :P 
 

Offline Don_1

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« Reply #8 on: 17/11/2009 14:44:24 »
Well I don't know about that, but it is certainly a contradiction in terms.....
 

Offline Geezer

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« Reply #9 on: 17/11/2009 16:41:50 »
My sarcasm is wasted  ;D
 

Offline Don_1

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« Reply #10 on: 17/11/2009 17:18:59 »
I can't prove you wrong, but I am curious about what the facts are that bring you to this conclusion or belief? LOL...LOL..

Well, for a start, its architecture and urban planning are unrivaled. Millions of visitors from all over the Universe are drawn to nearby Neport Pagnell, so it's obvious something is going on.

My daughter lives in Newpag Portnell Newport Pagnell, they witness many visitors escaping from Milton Keynes in that town, all screaming 'I'm free! At last I'm free!' as they scurry back to from whence they came, noteably lighter of wallet.

It is said that there are MK people there who left for work in 1979 and have still haven't found their way back home yet.
 

Offline Geezer

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« Reply #11 on: 17/11/2009 18:44:03 »
It is said that there are MK people there who left for work in 1979 and have still haven't found their way back home yet.
A bit like East Kilbride! Another "wonder" of urban planning.

Of course, the millions who "visit" Newpig Porknell never really get there because they only make it as far the Services on the M1.

I remember seeing a funny thing there about forty years ago. It was probably about 9 o'clock at night. A Transit "Luton" drew into the parking lot and rolled up the back door. Next thing you know a big crowd appeared from nowhere and started buying duvets from the guy. The whole "operation" was over in less than ten minutes.

The funny thing is I think the people that were buying them thought they were getting a bargain on account of them being "nicked", whereas, by the look of them, they were just cheap rubbish!

I once had an Italian guy offer me a woman's suede coat at a motorway rest stop outside Paris. He didn't want money, he just needed enough petrol for his BMW to get him home to Italy. The coat looked really nice, but I didn't want anything to do with it because I assumed it was "hot".

A few month's later I read an article about a gang that was flogging phony suede coats all over Europe. Turns out they were OK as long as you didn't get them wet. If you did, they fell to pieces.
 

Offline Bored chemist

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« Reply #12 on: 17/11/2009 18:52:22 »
I think "fabulous" means made up so I guess the M1 counts as fabulous.
It is widely hypothesised (or is it wildly hypothesised- I'm not sure) that there is a black hole at the centre of the universe.
M K isn't a black hole- it just sucks.

That's not fair, I understand that M K is a perfectly fine village, it's just that some git buried it in the middle of a "Newtown".
 

Offline Geezer

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« Reply #13 on: 17/11/2009 19:17:04 »
Architects and urban planners should be required to live in their own creations. Can't Prince Chuck decree that? I think he'd like to.
 

Offline Bored chemist

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« Reply #14 on: 17/11/2009 22:05:06 »
"Go ahead, someone explain to me what in blue blazes a "load of cobblers" is supposed to mean!  Go ahead, please!! "
OK,
It's rhyming slang.
Cobblers' awls = balls.

You can hardly blame the Bits for vegemite- that's an Aussie joke.
Feel free to check out Newport Pagnel; Milton Keynes and the mews on google earth.

On the other hand, can you comment on the story that Sarah Palin's glasses are a joke?
 

Offline Geezer

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« Reply #15 on: 17/11/2009 22:15:56 »
"a load of cobblers" translates to "a lot of balls" (in the anatomical sense).

"cobblers" is short for "cobbler's awls" which, obviously, rhymes with "balls". Of course, in rhyming slang, the actual rhyming word is usually dropped.

For example, when talking in the pub about an inebriated American who had recently thrown up and who was becoming rather belligerent, you'd simply say something like:

  "Pay no attention to that septic mate. He's so bleedin' elephants 'es been pat all over his whistle."

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Rhyming_slang

SNAP!
« Last Edit: 17/11/2009 22:18:03 by Geezer »
 

Offline Bored chemist

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« Reply #16 on: 18/11/2009 07:07:00 »
I forget where I first saw the assertion that her glasses are just plain glass "to make her look clever". All the pics I have seen since seem to support the idea.
 

Offline Geezer

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« Reply #17 on: 18/11/2009 07:48:29 »
I forget where I first saw the assertion that her glasses are just plain glass "to make her look clever". All the pics I have seen since seem to support the idea.

In Ireland they are called bifekalls, at all, at all.
« Last Edit: 18/11/2009 07:56:09 by Geezer »
 

Offline Don_1

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« Reply #18 on: 18/11/2009 08:49:13 »
Poor Dave. He thinks we are just trying to confuse the world.

As if!!!

Well, since there's no currant today, me and the trouble might get on our daisy's and take a ball down to the rub for a few elephants over a rabbit with our saucepan. I can't wait to get off me plates and sit me khyber down. I just don't like having to rubber in the frog when I want an oily.
 

Offline Geezer

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« Reply #19 on: 18/11/2009 16:23:36 »
Don_1, You know you really should give then up anyway. No sense in pushing your Donald.
 

Offline Bored chemist

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« Reply #20 on: 18/11/2009 18:59:52 »
She inspired the slogan, "A mind is a terrible thing to waste." ;D


How?
 

Offline Madidus_Scientia

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« Reply #21 on: 18/11/2009 19:55:55 »
I couldn't believe it when I saw a clip of Palin somewhere where in a speech she said something along the lines of "They're wasting money on studying fruit flies! fruit flies for cying out loud, who cares about the fruit flies?"

She was referring to research using drosophila flies, which has greatly added to our understanding of genetics.

It's funny the tangents some threads go on :p
 

Offline geo driver

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« Reply #22 on: 18/11/2009 21:41:51 »
right then chums.
the other day i was on the bone the strife when i fell down the apple and stares, the strife said your aving a bath when i told her a mate half hitched my motor.

and yes milton keynes sucks all into its centre making it very difficult to excape even light has gone b4 you get out of all the round-a-bouts onto the tragady of the m1
 

Offline Geezer

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« Reply #23 on: 19/11/2009 02:40:17 »
right then chums.
the other day i was on the bone the strife when i fell down the apple and stares, the strife said your aving a bath when i told her a mate half hitched my motor.

Let me suggest a few minor changes. This stuff is quite tricky. I'm sure Don_1 can help.

the other day i was on the bonedog with the strifetrouble when i fell down the apples and stares, the strifetrouble said your aving a bath when i told her a mate had halfed hitched my motor.

 

Offline Geezer

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« Reply #24 on: 19/11/2009 19:45:46 »
Uhh....  :-\
The trick is to drop the word that actually rhymes with the word in the message. That way, only those who know the vocabulary will undersand what you are talking about. It's a code.

dog = phone (dog and bone)
trouble = wife (trouble and strife)
apples = stairs (apples and stairs)
halfed = pinched (half inched) (this one is slang on slang of course)

I noticed Don had elephants = beers (elephant's ears) whereas I used elephants = drunk (elephant's trunk), so the context is very important too.

There are also regional variations. Mick = lager (Mick Jagger), but I think that is only in Glasgow. There, winners = troosers (winners and losers. In Scotland trousers is commonly pronounced "troosers")
 

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« Reply #24 on: 19/11/2009 19:45:46 »

 

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