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Author Topic: Punning is hard(ly) work! Is groaning aloud here?  (Read 963180 times)

Offline demografx

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Punning is hard(ly) work! Groaning aloud here?
« Reply #1675 on: 06/12/2011 21:34:18 »

DEMOGRAFX!!!


Shame on you, you have failed to point out that December is Tie Month.










Oh no! I goofed! Horrifically!!! Will I have to tie one on in shame?? Your news just bowled me over.

You've exposed me for the tierant that I have always been.

The reason I couldn't post it was because I was tied up at the moment.

Don, next time please have more compassion when judging me: when I was once a sailor, I had ties to home but was knot there often.

« Last Edit: 06/12/2011 23:07:54 by demografx »
 

Offline Don_1

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Punning is hard(ly) work! Groaning aloud here?
« Reply #1676 on: 07/12/2011 09:43:02 »

....... I was tied up at the moment.


One day your antics with that Au pair will get found out!


OK, you are forgiven this time, but any more omissions and it will be the rack for you or a spot of neck stretching. I’ll have no more slipping. That will become abundantly clear.
 

Offline demografx

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Punning is hard(ly) work! Groaning aloud here?
« Reply #1677 on: 08/12/2011 00:10:20 »

Anything but waterboarding! Last time you did that I was on a liquid diet for a whole week!
 

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« Reply #1678 on: 08/12/2011 05:31:49 »

Will I have to tie one on in shame??


Too late! I missed Tie One On Day, November 23!

Will have to wait for next year's !
http://www.apronmemories.com/tie-one-on-day/

 

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Punning is hard(ly) work! Groaning aloud here?
« Reply #1679 on: 08/12/2011 11:04:52 »

Will I have to tie one on in shame??


Too late! I missed Tie One On Day, November 23!



I would taiwan on to cover my shy knees but I think I've a cold coming on, or some sort of germ anyway. I feel chile and so sick man, illa than you can imagine. I'd best eat something, like turkey, as they say you should feed a cold, though I don't feel hungary, or I're land up in bed for a few days. Of course 'er indoors will never believe it, I'll have to peruve it to her that I haves pain.

She'll just say 'get in dia van, burma bit of rubber and get going. Nor way am I letting you laze around before Xmas.'.
 

Offline Donnah

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Punning is hard(ly) work! Groaning aloud here?
« Reply #1680 on: 08/12/2011 22:17:41 »

....... I was tied up at the moment.


One day your antics with that Au pair will get found out!


OK, you are forgiven this time, but any more omissions and it will be the rack for you or a spot of neck stretching. I’ll have no more slipping. That will become abundantly clear.

Demografx, Don_1's forgiveness must have set you at Tie one ease!

 

Offline demografx

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Punning is hard(ly) work! Groaning aloud here?
« Reply #1681 on: 09/12/2011 02:20:31 »


Truly, Donnah, I feel exonerated. Or is that x-rated?

Hmm.

 

Offline demografx

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« Reply #1682 on: 09/12/2011 02:30:26 »

I would taiwan on to cover my shy knees but I think I've a cold coming on, or some sort of germ anyway. I feel chile and so sick man, illa than you can imagine. I'd best eat something, like turkey, as they say you should feed a cold, though I don't feel hungary, or I're land up in bed for a few days. Of course 'er indoors will never believe it, I'll have to peruve it to her that I haves pain.

She'll just say 'get in dia van, burma bit of rubber and get going. Nor way am I letting you laze around before Xmas.'.



I like European food so I decided to Russia over there because I was Hungary. After Czech'ing the menu I ordered Turkey. When I was Finnished I told the waiter 'Spain good but there is Norway I could eat another bite'.
« Last Edit: 09/12/2011 02:39:53 by demografx »
 

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Punning is hard(ly) work! Groaning aloud here?
« Reply #1683 on: 09/12/2011 10:20:38 »

I like European food so I decided to Russia over there because I was Hungary. After Czech'ing the menu I ordered Turkey. When I was Finnished I told the waiter 'Spain good but there is Norway I could eat another bite'.


R, L O, F U N E M N X
S, V F M N X

Any excuse for this sketch from The Two Ronnies.
 

Offline demografx

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« Reply #1684 on: 09/12/2011 15:54:52 »

Any excuse for this sketch from The Two Ronnies.








(LMFAHO!)


« Last Edit: 10/12/2011 03:18:17 by demografx »
 

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Punning is hard(ly) work! Groaning aloud here?
« Reply #1685 on: 10/12/2011 12:59:24 »
Good grief Demo. you seem to have lost your mind!

I should have known it was a mistake to let you watch that clip, especially since I had just bought you this 4.000 year old Egyptian cranial adornment for Xmas:




Ah well, I’ll send it back, after all de cap it ancient anyway.



What's that in the road ahead?
What's that in the road, a head?



Q. What is Demo's head singing as it rolls off into the distance?
A. 'I Ain't Got Nobody'.

The old ones are the oldest!
 

Offline Donnah

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« Reply #1686 on: 10/12/2011 21:22:47 »
This 'E chipped chin fellow nose he has a great hat on his whooping big craneum.  You two rule, so hop in the car, Toot 'n cam on over, 'cause I'd like to show this to my mummy.
 

Offline demografx

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« Reply #1687 on: 11/12/2011 04:38:42 »



And Don has agreed to share with Donnah......... the Mummy Punny Award!
« Last Edit: 11/12/2011 04:45:13 by demografx »
 

Offline demografx

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« Reply #1688 on: 11/12/2011 05:44:55 »

And this is all relevant - even today:  it was the pharaohs of Egypt who worked out the very first pyramid scheme!
« Last Edit: 11/12/2011 05:47:33 by demografx »
 

Offline demografx

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Punning is hard(ly) work! Groaning aloud here?
« Reply #1689 on: 11/12/2011 06:03:53 »

In Egypt archaeologists pyramid the ruins for mummies and those places where ancient wrappers performed.
 

Offline Donnah

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Punning is hard(ly) work! Groaning aloud here?
« Reply #1690 on: 11/12/2011 18:39:32 »
You birds are a hoot and sound like a couple of wise old owls.
 

Offline demografx

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Punning is hard(ly) work! Groaning aloud here?
« Reply #1691 on: 12/12/2011 19:51:52 »
Thank you, Donnah!

Your punctuation is always welcome here!

:)  :)
« Last Edit: 12/12/2011 23:18:35 by demografx »
 

Offline demografx

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Punning is hard(ly) work! Groaning aloud here?
« Reply #1692 on: 12/12/2011 21:46:18 »


I had just bought you this 4.000 year old Egyptian cranial adornment for Xmas:




THANK YOU, DON!! I will treasure this forever! And I will bury all previous resentment. :)





Q. What is Demo's head singing as it rolls off into the distance?

A. 'I Ain't Got Nobody'.



The headlines nobody likes are wrinkles.

« Last Edit: 12/12/2011 23:07:55 by demografx »
 

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Punning is hard(ly) work! Groaning aloud here?
« Reply #1693 on: 13/12/2011 13:05:00 »
Toot 'n cam on over, 'cause I'd like to show this to my mummy.

We will! What's more, we will bring an old time group to play some music during the unveiling, though it has to be said, the band age will be quite high.
 

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Punning is hard(ly) work! Groaning aloud here?
« Reply #1694 on: 13/12/2011 13:15:05 »


The headlines nobody likes are wrinkles.



The local beauty salon offers a cure for wrinkles, smoothing on a mixture of essential oils. I have seen them balming as i walk past.
 

Offline demografx

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« Reply #1695 on: 13/12/2011 17:25:15 »

I have seen them balming as i walk past.


Embalming? Mummies? Oh, c'mon, you certainly know that's a dead art.
 

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Punning is hard(ly) work! Groaning aloud here?
« Reply #1696 on: 13/12/2011 18:18:56 »
Sometimes I have grave worries about you, Demo. They are not only my worries, they're hearse indoors too! You'll come to some greef one day.
 

Offline demografx

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Punning is hard(ly) work! Groaning aloud here?
« Reply #1697 on: 14/12/2011 06:25:57 »

Sometimes I have grave worries about you, Demo.


You're projecting, Don, and it's all because you're simply buried in your work. Slow down!



They are not only my worries, they're hearse indoors too!


Awwww, now you sound just like those heavy drinkers who always put the quart before the hearse.


« Last Edit: 14/12/2011 19:42:24 by demografx »
 

Offline Donnah

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Punning is hard(ly) work! Groaning aloud here?
« Reply #1698 on: 15/12/2011 05:45:38 »
How can he be impaired if he's drinking alone?  ???
 

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Re: Punning is hard(ly) work! Groaning aloud here?
« Reply #1699 on: 18/12/2011 12:40:31 »
How can he be impaired if he's drinking alone?  ???

The last time an imp aired his views to me, I smashed him in the gob lined him up with some other miscreants and pixi enough of them to make a grimm example of. One, named Peggy I kicked up the bum. Peggy’s arse was so sore she couldn’t sit down. The others I made gargoyle with vinegar, which made their throat’s very unelfy. I made this torture drag on until they pleaded for mercy. “We feel very grotoy” they said. “Fair enough”, I said and let them wander off into the woodland for rest and recuperation. Should any of them return, I warned them, to dsingly delve into mischief again, I’ll give them a fairy rough dusting down.
 

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Re: Punning is hard(ly) work! Groaning aloud here?
« Reply #1699 on: 18/12/2011 12:40:31 »

 

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