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Author Topic: On The 'Even' Lighter Side: Is GMT stingy?..and any other such utter nonsense :)  (Read 4585 times)

Offline alancalverd

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Are you pro, or it it a personal thing?

Very few people make any money playing jazz or brass band music, so I guess it's personal!

Interestingly (at least to musicians) after a lifetime of playing plucked strings, I'm finding it very difficult to synchronise my hands as I'm learning the piano. Particularly on the double bass, the left hand always leads the right: find the note with the left, then play it with the right. Since the bass part is generally slow, the left hand starts moving about a sixteenth ahead of the beat. Time to rewire the brain and play all ten notes at once!
 

Offline Colin2B

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... after a lifetime of playing plucked strings, I'm finding it very difficult to synchronise my hands as I'm learning the piano.
As this is a thread about time discussion on timing seems to be appropriate so:
I also play guitar and you are right, LH fingers need to be in place and applying pressure just before the note is played. But, as a bass player do you play exactly on the beat or fractionally ahead or behind? If exactly, do all instruments in your group hit exactly on beat?
 

Offline alancalverd

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Depends on the style. In a big band, which includes the tuba parts in a military band, the bass plays an exact beat and the rest of the band (including the drummer) swings around the bass - the unwritten secret of Glenn Miller, and the difference between a good dance band and a thrilling one. In rock, I like to drag behind the drums: this makes the drummer's offbeat sound slightly ahead, which adds sparkle. In a cabaret trio or quartet, it's sometimes "smokier" to accentuate and swell the lead by playing the bass line a fraction after the melody note - if the bass plays consistently ahead of the vocal it makes her sound uncertain.

I assume the other guys hit their notes at the appropriate time! Standing at the back, next to the drummer, I have very little idea of what it all sounds like live, but as long as the conductor waves his stick in time with me, everyone seems happy.  Seriously, though, I'd hope the lead trumpet adjusts his timing for emphasis, and the sax pack at least synchronise among themselves, otherwise it sounds like a school band, furiously reading the dots and not thinking about them.
 

Offline timey

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I used to like an open Jazz night back in the day when I got out and about a bit more, but I get you, there's no money in it!  In fact, unless your in the heart of commercialism, the music industry as a whole has pretty much dropped through the floor these days.  Yes!  I can visualise your left hand timing thing and how that might relate to the piano.  Double bass is hard, I've had a go.  I started on violin at primary school.  My teacher, due to my pitch, timing, delivery, and ability to play anything by ear, was determined that during my secondary school education that he would force me to learn notation.  However, my life took a different turn when I was taken out of school aged 11 and ended up in India on some other tangent, never to return to that school or any other for that matter!

I haven't met an instrument that I can't get a note out of, but there is this annoying lag between what I hear in my head and being able to express that through an instrument.  Yes, I know "practice, practice, practice"!

I trained as a sound engineer, tape hopping for Damien Korner, Alexis Korner's son...  He was a character!!!   Oh, and that reminds me of something... We were recording D'ream, setting up the mikes and patching in the effects.  As the band were settling into their session, he asked me who I though was the most intelligent person in the room...to which I replied dutifully "Well that would be you, of course, Damien." ... And despite the fact that everyone in the room laughed, I could see his shoulders square up a little as his chest puffed out, (bless him, he's dead now).  He thanked me for my opinion, telling me it was very kind of me to say so, but pointed me in the direction of the keyboard player, who indeed was the young Brian Cox.

But Alan, we digress...

I can see that you are a man of many subjects... I've been following you, although please do not worry, I will NOT in any shape or form be encouraging you to take on the role of guru, there are at least benefits to being king.   Anyway, back in the era of when I was working with Damien, which is why it's come to mind, I was required to collect someone's daughter from a particularly scummy one of those squat parties that were popular of that day on my way home from the studio.  I picked up a Kentucky fried chicken meal on the way (reckless I know, but I was much younger then) and was tucking in with gusto while waiting for this girl to say goodbye to her friends, when the Harry Krishna's sitting next to me  decided to educate me about meat.  I told them that their points were in fact most valid but had they considered the vegetables.  It's a well known fact that plants are sensitive, they enjoy music and have lives as well and next time they sat down to their vegetarian meal they might picture hundreds of thousand of carrots being pulled from their home by their top knots, screaming for help.

So Alan...my question to you being: Do organic carrots scream louder?

P.S, :) reading the other posts now.
 

Offline timey

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As this is a thread about time discussion on timing seems to be appropriate so:

Well you'll notice that I tend towards the silly and the ridiculous, so in this respect consider the gauntlet now laid at your feet, but any chat, hanging out, music links and general letting your hair down also welcome.  Feel free!
 

Offline timey

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I dunno, used to be in the oldern days that you could cut a pattern, specify a material, indicate the colour and give description of the trimmings, show it to someone and they'd say, "Oooohh, that's an interesting dress, have you thought about, blah, blah, blah."

These days they want you to spin the cotton, weave the material, chew the dye out of dangerous and possibly mind altering plant matter.  Hand stitch the damn thing, and then having insisted that you put it on and pose about in it, they then say "Oh, I don't much like yer boots!"

Honerrstly, what is the world coming to?
 

Offline alancalverd

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Mick Jagger summed up the music business very neatly. He pointed out that until 1877, the only way to make money from music was to do live gigs, write music, or teach. Then for about 100 years you could make a fortune selling records, until cassette tape, CD and mp3 meant that everyone could listen to your recorded music for free, so nowadays you have to do live gigs, write music or teach....

Can't say I've worn a patterned dress for a long time. It turns out that if you wear a white shirt and black trousers every day, people tend to talk about more interesting things than clothes, you are acceptably dressed for any occasion, and you don't waste time shopping.
 

Offline timey

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I'm going to take that as good sound advice.  Its straightforwardly uncomplicated and I'll be able to give my 'actual' dress sense as little consideration as I do now.  The local shop might ask if I'm going to a funeral and that will make a change from the usual weather banter...I can see how this might work!
« Last Edit: 16/08/2015 02:19:53 by timey »
 

Offline Colin2B

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Thanks Alan, that helps me make sense of what I've been hearing. Keep up the good work.

.........consider the gauntlet now laid at your feet,
Gauntlet eh? I tend to handle most things with kid gloves and many of my remarks are off the cuff. However, if you point me in the right direction I'll try not to be too offhand or gauche but thumb through some ideas and perhaps a small sleight of the neurones for entertainment.

One comment for David Cooper regarding GMT. Mars time? Surely Cornish time! Considering the Great Western Railway was the first standard time to be adopted over Britain during the Victorian era, you would have a good precedent. Failing that everyone go back to using local sundial time. 
 

Offline timey

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Well Colin...(chuckle), I'll leave it to David to answer your post.  He has some excellent philosophy emerging on the needs of the general public and I'd be interested to get back to his point of view on the matter!

However, my ears have pricked up concerning your notion of sundial time... I design phone apps in my spare time and could see there being a huge uptake in Britain alone, never mind the other more inflicted parts of the Northern hemisphere.  In fact it occurs that moon-dial would also be hugely popular as an add-on sister app for those finding themselves dealing with the extremes near the North and South Poles.   In any case I want you to know that it is patently obvious that credit must be accredited where credit is due, so if anything comes of it, I'll let you know.
 

Offline timey

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If we all took care of each other, we wouldn't have to take care of ourselves... 

There are people who don't realise this!
 

Offline alancalverd

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When you have perfected your sundial app fpr a mobile phone, you might consider inventing a paper envelope thingy so you can compose a text message on the screen ,pop the phone into a little bag, and mail it to the recipient. There's already an envelope symbol on the screen, so it's just crying out for the appropriate hardware.
 

Offline timey

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Having heard the penny drop and just today completed my first 'split quote', (I'm so proud of myself), I'm going to have a go at branching out...

not

confused

a[8D]

t

all

(Edit:  Lol, lol, it worked! Can't believe it! Now is that some kind of bizarre internet version of finger puppetry, or what?)
« Last Edit: 17/08/2015 19:40:55 by timey »
 

Offline timey

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When you have perfected your sundial app fpr a mobile phone, you might consider inventing a paper envelope thingy so you can compose a text message on the screen ,pop the phone into a little bag, and mail it to the recipient. There's already an envelope symbol on the screen, so it's just crying out for the appropriate hardware.

Crikes Alan, I think you've cracked it!

But, to say so, today's public are notoriously discerning... I think we 'may' have to lose the paper... (coughs), erm... sorry - annnd the bag!
But on the brighter side, I think it a very exciting prospect, (and I do hope you like this), if we consider our teleportation notion from earlier this thread in relation to this envelope you have identified as going spare.
Please picture the scene:

We have envelope icon on phone screen (I'd like it all shimmering and translucent myself, but this is just a suggestion, you might have a preference, it's your app too)...
The idea being that you can drop anything into this envelope and having specified an IP address or mobile phone number, it arrives at the destination specified.
Of course we 'could' drop into this envelope, texts, emails, tweets, or whatever of these types of products you most care to inflict your friends with, but seriously... these banal functions merely explore the edges of this technologies potential!!
Let's try, by specifying a destination and the item sent as being the phones own number.., and look, by pressing 'send phone'... check this out.., the phone itself collapses inward - like a black hole forming -disappearing into the envelope while the envelope simultaneously collapses to a point and disappears!  That's pretty cool don't you think?  That phone will now reassemble out of the envelope icon of the destination IP or mobile.
It is important that we really work on the smoothness of the look here, I cannot stress this strongly enough!  The consumer element do go for these swishy effects...it will be one of the main selling points, I'm sure...
Fortunately, I have here another phone to further demonstrate.  If we now go to option window three over here, you can see that it is possible to link this app with your phones camera!!!  Using Holographic Universe technology we can simply photograph that which we wish to send and then drop the picture into the envelope icon.  You could, for instance, send your house to Spain to stay in for the summer holidays.  So long as you have an IP or mobile in an area that is sufficiently not occupied by anything else, not a problem.  I myself might well be tempted to send someone else's house to Spain for my holiday, but I have no doubt that laws will emerge quickly to counteract this sort of thing...

Over to you Alan, I might of missed something important... I'm signing off now, I think it's time for a hot chocolate with brandy for me...
« Last Edit: 17/08/2015 23:45:36 by timey »
 

Offline timey

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Alan, I was going to send you a pm about this, but when I told my son he rolled his eyes and told me that everyone knows already...and also laughed his head off at my suggestion that I had witnessed the possibility of my first 'potential' baby steps into the world of hacking. :)

So... during my recent foray learning the art of multi quoting, it became obvious to me the difference between a quote that you are permitted to quote and a quote from a person that you have somehow become unable to quote.  Dear me, it's just a matter of one little symbol!  Seriously, and rest assured, I wouldn't ever do it because that would be rude, but I think, and I say think because I haven't tested it for reason already stated... I think that it would most definitely be possible to quite simply add the missing symbol back in and quote them anyway, lol!
It also seems possible, although again for same reason above I have only tested this while quoting myself - so the possibility does exist that it wouldn't work while quoting others, ... but it does appear that one can actually change the text in a quote in its entirety and have it say something quite different...
...Anyway, I want you all to know that if the day ever comes when curiosity does get the better of me, I hear by do solemnly swear that I will never ever make any of you say anything that you might regret!
 

Offline Colin2B

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.....In fact it occurs that moon-dial would also be hugely popular as an add-on sister app for those finding themselves dealing with the extremes near the North and South Poles.   In any case I want you to know that it is patently obvious that credit must be accredited where credit is due, so if anything comes of it, I'll let you know.
I have used the moon as a timepiece when travelling through UK woodland in total darkness as I rarely carry a watch. However, I don't think I will ever get much royalty from a moondial app. Won't get much use either as I don't carry a smartphone!
Don't let me put you off building one though [8D]

Did you know that Alexandra the Great invented the 1st wristwatch? Apparently he gave all his generals one so they could coord attacks. It was a cloth wristband on which was mounted a miniature folding sundial. Became known as Alexander's rag time band.
 

Offline timey

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Probably the very secret of his success!  I can definitely see battle's being won with an off beat swing...
 

Offline timey

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When you have perfected your sundial app fpr a mobile phone, you might consider inventing a paper envelope thingy

Aww, Alan, seriously... if its paper you want, then it is paper you shall have, who am I to argue?  Sometimes retro 'is' the way to go.  I can actually see an intrinsic quality and quirky-ness in the notion.  It could in fact quite accentuate the modern state of the art swish of the overall look.  I'm so sorry I rubbished the idea... I hope you will forgive me?
Of course you realise that it can't actually be constructed of real paper... I know we are aiming for disposable devises but the consumer might draw the line on that one!  We can however replicate paper in every other aspect.  Your envelope will look like, feel like, act like, and with use of the phones speaker, sound just like paper.  Hey, we could, by employing a tad of quantum suggestion, even make it smell like paper... Ok?  :) 
 

Offline alancalverd

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I'm a great advocate of the paper envelope thingy. It was the anarchosyndicalists who pointed out that you can send a letter from anywhere to anywhere, but there is no international post office, just a commonsense presumption that most people will reply, so the postal services in all countries will receive stamp revenues in proportion to the work they do collecting and delivering the mail.

Quite what that has to do with anything, escapes me, but it's a beautiful thought.
 

Offline timey

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Wow, Alan...!  That has gotta be 'the' most wonderful suggestion I have ever heard for country's to pay off their national debts.  A true example of the pen being mightier than the sword! :)
 

Offline timey

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...meanwhile, we find ourselves, in the interests of furthering the functionality of the sundial app and not for any nosey, privacy invading reasons (honest!)... glued to our earphones, eves-dropping in on an international 'North Pole' to 'South Pole' mobile telephone conversation...

Bring, bring...bring, bring...

"Hello..."

"Hello!  Oh thank goodness you've answered, where are you?  I'll come and pick you up."

"Well, I'm not sure, it's just that it's dark, I'm standing by the research centre but the moons gone behind a cloud, I can't see a thing and I think I'm quite lost"

"Oh, (chuckles)... Don't worry about that, your moon dial has kicked in and needs resetting, the auto function is a bit sticky near the pole, we think it's shift related.  Search for 'settings' and go straight to 'restart', that should fix it, works for most people.  You have still got the map, I sent you?"

"Yes...but"

"Well, I'm the first on the left after the  second largest observatory. It's not far."

"Yes, but...I have tried resetting the moon dial app and I've sent sundial themselves an error message, all I keep getting is a pop up saying that there are area related restrictions in place"

"Ah yes, well it is true that we do frown upon inappropriate and out of hours usage of night time relief here at the pole, it's taken quite seriously... look you'd better reset it manually, I'll text you instructions and I really would get that sorted out immediately, you don't need a whopping fine... see you soon, I'll put some coffee on...bye"

To be continued...
 

Offline Colin2B

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I just get a message saying 'moondial non operational until location services and clock are enabled'
So it can't tell me where or when I am until I tell it where and when it is.
Back to paper, pencil and compass for me.
 

Offline timey

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Oh, Colin...not you as well?  This auto function really is a bit sticky.  I can't get hold of my computer man, same old story... as usual.  Those server fairies are no help wotsoever!!!  In any case, I'm on it, but it occurs that you are the tech guy.  Perhaps we've been hacked?
 

Offline Colin2B

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The only hacking being done is with my penknife. There, that's got it sharp, now where's the paper and almanac?
 

Offline timey

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now where's the paper and almanac?

Perhaps you have become absenth minded?

I just located this:  漢字仮名交じり文 ... on the dark side, can't make head nor tail of it, any thoughts?
« Last Edit: 25/08/2015 23:32:13 by timey »
 

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