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Author Topic: Why don't I like my siblings as much as I should?  (Read 385 times)

Offline cheryl j

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It's been a stressful summer - my dad died, and we had to put mom into assisted living, which meant spending much more time with my siblings beyond the occasional holiday. Lying in bed one night, it occurred to me that in all honesty, I like my sibblings no better, and sometimes a great deal less, than total strangers I might meet on the street. We seem to have no more or less common, as far as interests go or shared beliefs.
 That is an awful thing to admit.  But how can this be right? They are  not terrible  people - that is not what I mean.  But shouldn't I prefer them much more, because they share my genes? Shouldn't I feel a natural protective feeling or longing to be near them,  like my child?

How do siblings act in other primate groups?



 

Offline mrsmith2211

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Re: Why don't I like my siblings as much as I should?
« Reply #1 on: 20/09/2016 00:59:56 »
Do not feel you are obligated to love your siblings. People are people, and there is no moral imperative that says you have to treat them any differently than any one you meet on the street.
 

Offline RD

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Re: Why don't I like my siblings as much as I should?
« Reply #2 on: 24/09/2016 13:01:50 »
... shouldn't I prefer them much more, because they share my genes?

People who first met their siblings as adults can prefer them a bit too much because they share genes ... https://wikipedia.org/wiki/Genetic_sexual_attraction
« Last Edit: 24/09/2016 13:07:47 by RD »
 

Offline evan_au

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Re: Why don't I like my siblings as much as I should?
« Reply #3 on: 25/09/2016 00:19:25 »
You never really know someone until you have shared an inheritance with them...
 
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Online alancalverd

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Re: Why don't I like my siblings as much as I should?
« Reply #4 on: 28/09/2016 14:32:25 »
Indifference is nothing to be ashamed of. Sibling rivalry turns up in all sorts of ugly forms from regicide via the Labour Party leadership elections to the first-hatched eagle chick eating its brothers. Your siblings should be grateful that you just don't care that much.

Commiserations on your family circumstances nevertheless. It always comes as shock to find that the infinitely patient, strong and resourceful parents who nurtured and protected us have suddenly become vulnerable, needy, or even dead. There's surprisingly little comfort in inevitabilty, but one of the wisest statements I came across was "every perfect marriage ends in widowhood". I guess the same applies to watching parents fade and die: the more it hurts, the better it must have been.   
« Last Edit: 28/09/2016 14:39:19 by alancalverd »
 

Offline Semaphore

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Re: Why don't I like my siblings as much as I should?
« Reply #5 on: 28/09/2016 15:37:33 »
My brother and I hate each other. He made my life a misery when we were young, for which I've never forgiven him. You can choose your friends but you can't choose your family.
 

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Re: Why don't I like my siblings as much as I should?
« Reply #5 on: 28/09/2016 15:37:33 »

 

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