Who would win: wolf or jaguar?

07 February 2017

Question

Laura - My husband, our 4-year old, and I were recently watching an episode of Shaun the Sheep where the naughty cat dresses up like a jaguar and Bitzer the dog has to try to stave him off. It got us thinking about the ancestors of these animals, and we were wondering, in a hypothetical skirmish, who would win, a jaguar, or a wolf?

Answer

Chris Smith put this to zoologist Chris Basu, before first checking with the rest of the team...

Richard - I think wolf. But I think in reality wolves because wolves are in packs. I think they would win.

Chris S - Danny?

Danni - Yeah, I’d go wolf as well. I think they’d go straight for the throat to just get in there.

Chris S - Tim?

Tim -  Well, I was also going to go wolf but I don’t want to be a Shaun the Sheep. So I’m going to say jaguar.

Chris S - Well Chris, put us out of our misery. What’s the answer?

Chris B - Well, I think if I was locked in a zoo enclosure with one of these animals, I definitely hope it was the wolf. First of all there’s the weight issue. A jaguar can weigh up to about 100 kilos and a grey wolf is about half this, and then there’s the you knew army aspect. So wolves tend to hunt in groups so groups of six and over will take down something about 100 kilos. If the jaguar’s by itself it really won’t need any help with taking down a wolf. So I think it’s the cat every time… not contest!

But, on a personal note, I’m also a veterinary surgeon and if I’m faced with an angry cat or an angry dog, I would definitely prefer the angry dog. Cats are way meaner.

Chris S - People say that cat bites are really nasty compared to dog bites because their teeth are much sharper and more penetrating, so they tend to produce deep-seated wounds that you get certain kinds of infections in there like pasteurella, multocida infections and things… nasty.

Chris B - Yeah. Cats bites are absolutely horrible. Cats mouths are really, really dirty things and, yes, they just inject these bacterial deep into your soft tissues. It hurts - it definitely hurts.

Chris S - And we have these things as pets?

Chris B - I love cats.

Chris S - It’s fun isn’t it how people break down into a cat person or a dog person. Do you find that with the patients that you see?

Chris B - I’ve met plenty of people who are quite polarised either side. Yet crazy, crazy cat people, I guess like me and you get crazy dog people as well. But there is a middle ground you’ll be pleased to know.

Chris S - Danni; dog person, cat person?

Danni - I was raised by greyhounds. All my early memories are of this big white greyhound called Mitzi. Even being toilet trained, I’m not going to go into i,t but I don’t remember my parents being there. I’m sure they were but, yeah, definitely a dog person.

Chris S - Tim?

Tim - I think if I have to decide, I’m probably a dog person, but I’m really neither. Having an animal in my house is not the top of my list so if I had to have one it would be monkey... definitely.

Chris S - Although there’s been a lot of  new coverage about people taking captive primates in the wild isn’t there and it’s causing quite a lot of controversy - Chris?

Chris - Yeah. Monkey are not really suited to be pet animals. They’re highly, highly intelligent  and we put them into these domestic situations where they’re just not suited and it’s quite a stressful thing. So I’m quietly judging you for your monkey comments here.

Tim - Can I just say that was a joke and I do not plan to take a primate or anything of the sort from it’s natural habitat and put it in my home.

Chris S - Just call Tim Michael Jackson.

Comments

The obvious answer with wolf vs jaguar is... the jaguar! Just kidding. You're an idiot if you think jaguar would win. Wolf can weigh up to 300 frickin' pounds. Get your facts right, people! Wolves are larger, faster, stronger, smarter, jump higher vertically, jump farther horizontally, climb things better, have longer and sharper claws, longer and sharper teeth, are hairier, and have way better senses. A lone wolf would completely obliterate and ANNIHILATE a stupid-ass jaguar. The jaguar would be too scared and just run away, but the wolf is much quicker, up to 58mph! And a wolf is better on ANY terrain, too. If the jaguar runs up a tall, straight, tree, the wolf would run up the tree, gripping it with its long, curved claws, faster than a squirrel or chipmunk and BAMM!!! Wolf snatches jaguar with claws and jaguar falls to the ground, running for dear life. Wolf leaps down, not even trying anymore. Then the wolf jumps 15 feet into the air and pounces on the jaguar, full-out attack on it. The wolf has a much stronger bite force... over 2,000 damn pounds per square inch! That's a lot! Better than a dumb tiger's!! Then, finally, the wolf kills the jaguar easily. Done. Game over for the jaguar. He/she is dead now, no match for a lone wolf. Wolf is SUPERIOR!!! Canines=win against any feline. Get wrecked felines, canines are way, WAY better. Sorry cats, dog win suckas. (:

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