[Geezer (OP)]

Despite the remarks of certain couthless US politicians, I thought the Olympic opening ceremony was brilliant, although I did find myself zoning out a bit when they got to the modern bit.

[RD]

Want a memento ? : an Olympic torch, one careful owner, ~10 miles on the clock, yours for only £150K  ...


http://www.mirror.co.uk/news/uk-news/london-2012-153000-olympic-torch-842560

[ in reality they are fetching about a grand each ... http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-18244534 ]

[Don_1]

....... in reality they are fetching about a grand each ... http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-18244534

At the time of posting this, there torches on eBay bid to nearly £3500.00

Organisers of the Olympics have criticised those selling their torches’ for making a profit out of the Olympics. Strange, I have seen no such criticism of the corporate giants like Coca Cola, McDonalds, Visa, Omega and BMW doing exactly the same.

[RD]

[ Invalid Attachment ]
http://memorabilia.london2012.com

I'm sure I could knock-up a convincing look-a-like with bubble-wrap and gold spray paint. []

[Don_1]

Despite the remarks of certain couthless US politicians, I thought the Olympic opening ceremony was brilliant, although I did find myself zoning out a bit when they got to the modern bit.

I don’t know who you could possibly be referring to mit this statement.

I had no desire to watch the opening ceremony, but ‘er indoors insisted, and ‘er indoors must be obeyed.

I thought the first 9,097 hours (that’s how long it seemed to me) was a tedious depiction of life in Britain during the Industrial Revolution. A bunch of seemingly unchoreographed plebs, meandering about doing little or nothing. Not exactly the height of excitement, let alone an image of Great Britain being the sort of ‘great’ you would want to advertise. A time of great inequality between the upper classes and the working classes. Poor standards of education, if any, for the working class children, poor or unaffordable healthcare, poor housing, poor nutrition, great child mortality, no job security, long working hours, low wages, poor and even positively dangerous working conditions, austerity, Rickets, TB etc etc etc.

Hmmm, notice anything familiar there?

Behind all this the band played on…… and on……. and on…… The choice of Elgar’s composition could not have been more morose, but I suppose it fitted the tedium of the visual (non)delectation. In fact, I felt so depressed, I was just about ready to stick my head in the oven. ‘Er indoors had to agree, it was not quite the spectacular she had expected.

Surely something a tad more jolly must happen soon. Some more action, some stirring music, perhaps some work of Elgar to get the blood pumping, like Pomp and Circumstance or Holst’s ‘Jupiter, (The Bringer of Joy)'. But still my aching heart; what is this? Some music to girdle the loins? Music to set the feet a tapping?.........The Dambusters March??? Oh! Very good, that wont offend anyone will it??? A celebration of the RAF’s 617 squadron attack on the dams of the Ruhr Valley during WWII. That should please the German contingent. Why not get a Lancaster Bomber flanked by a Hurricane and a Spitfire to do a fly-past and have a neon sign displaying the legend ‘We won the war’! Maybe some of the assembled plebs could dress in Nazi uniforms and shout ‘Achtung Schpitfire!’ Perhaps get Seb Coe to goose step up to the German Ambassador and Angela Merkel, middle and index finger of left hand under nose, clicking heels and raised right arm, a la Basil Fawlty, and chanting Sieg Heil! What an inappropriate piece to play. If the German’s weren’t offended by it, I was certainly offended on their behalf and felt ashamed of this poor choice of music.

By this point in the proceedings, ‘er indoors was so overcome with excitement, she had fallen asleep and I went into the garden for a fag, to calm my rage.

Twenty – seven – million – pounds! Twenty – seven – million pounds!!!

For the cost of a packet of crisps and a can of Pepsi ( Coke) I could have got the local school kids to do a damn sight better job.

Twenty – seven – million – quid!!!

Livingstone, you b*^>*^d, I keep telling you, I WANT MY WALNUT WHIP’S BACK!!!


To be continued......

[Don_1]

Continued from above

After smoking half a packet of coffin nails, I returned to the lounge to find ‘er indoors completely sparko, out for the count, well and truly in the land of nod. The opening ceremony was continuing in its efforts to bore the pants off one and all.

Now I like Rowan Atkinson, but I can only assume that his sole purpose for larking around at a keyboard, was a feeble attempt to draw one’s attention from the fact that the orchestra was playing the theme to ‘Chariots of Fire’, by Vangelis. A fine piece of music, maybe, but it is 31 years old.

Later, or was it before (such was my concentration, I haven’t a clue), Mike Oldfield’s ‘Tubular Bells’ was played. Again, a fine piece of music, but this is nearly 40 years old!

And to round off, Paul McCartney singing (after a fashion) ‘Hey Jude’. What on Earth has that got to do with the Olympics? It was written to bring comfort to Julian Lennon during the break-down of John & Cynthia’s marriage. AND it is OVER 40 years old.

Was it too much to ask that a composer of equal stature, but perhaps fewer years, should be commissioned to compose something new?

Impressed I was not. I thought it was a right load of old tosh.

The most annoying part of it all, was that every time I changed channel, it would awaken ‘er indoors, who would change back the TV saying, ‘I was watching that’ then promptly fall back into a comatosed state snoring her bloody head off.

“I’m going to bed…. Grumble grumble rant rave grumble snort”.

[imatfaal]

I liked it - but my comment seems so anodyne after Don's tour de force above - I just so wanted it not to be a pale imitation of the beijing forced-labour extravaganza, and it wasn't. 

And Don - I almost decided I didnt like it after reading the above!  Give up the puns - you're wasted at punning, you should rent yourself out to provide excoriation and criticism

[RD]

... Perhaps get Seb Coe to goose step up to the German Ambassador and Angela Merkel, middle and index finger of left hand under nose ...

The high-tech version ...

[]

BTW
 I've just thought of a use for these triangular cross-section Olympic torches, ( apart from a cigarette lighter ) ,
 a protective case for giant bars of Toblerone ...
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[RD]

I hope they've spelled Gary's name correctly on the torch ...

 [ Invalid Attachment ]
http://memorabilia.london2012.com


They're flogging everything that isn't screwed down ...

 [ Invalid Attachment ]
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[schneebfloob]

Organisers of the Olympics have criticised those selling their torches’ for making a profit out of the Olympics. Strange, I have seen no such criticism of the corporate giants like Coca Cola, McDonalds, Visa, Omega and BMW doing exactly the same.

Would these be the corporate giants who've made the event possible by making up more than 90% of the total funding?

I thought the first 9,097 hours (that’s how long it seemed to me) was a tedious depiction of life in Britain during the Industrial Revolution. A bunch of seemingly unchoreographed plebs, meandering about doing little or nothing. Not exactly the height of excitement, let alone an image of Great Britain being the sort of ‘great’ you would want to advertise. A time of great inequality between the upper classes and the working classes. Poor standards of education, if any, for the working class children, poor or unaffordable healthcare, poor housing, poor nutrition, great child mortality, no job security, long working hours, low wages, poor and even positively dangerous working conditions, austerity, Rickets, TB etc etc etc.

Like it or not, that is our history. You can either sit there and be ashamed of it, or you could actually acknowledge that the Industrial Revolution was arguably the greatest force of social change that has emerged in the history of humanity. That started here. That is what we've given the world. Personally, I feel rather proud of it and I'm sick of people apologising for it on my behalf.

The Dambusters March??? Oh! Very good, that wont offend anyone will it??? A celebration of the RAF’s 617 squadron attack on the dams of the Ruhr Valley during WWII. That should please the German contingent. Why not get a Lancaster Bomber flanked by a Hurricane and a Spitfire to do a fly-past and have a neon sign displaying the legend ‘We won the war’!

Again, that is our heritage. And also again, I'm sick of people apologising on my behalf. This isn't about appeasing Germany. It happened. An awful lot of people consider the actions of our brave troops in the world wars to be an integral part of our history, and underline what it means to be British. It shouldn't be ignored or brushed aside, or anything else. It is a part of who we are, whether you like it or not.

Twenty – seven – million – pounds! Twenty – seven – million pounds!!!

£27million pounds, for an advert that reached more than 1billion people across the globe live. Not to mention the millions more who went on to read about it in the foreign press -- it has been celebrated in the American media like the NYTimes; in Australia; in the Times of India; in China; across the entire globe. You may sniff now, but London's laughing all the way to the bank. That advert has made London the place to be, and it's an advert that's going to attract people to London for years to come, never mind the country as a whole. In the short term, yeah, sure, whatever, tourists are down. In 2-3 years time? The returns from the advertising will more than make up for £27million.

Ta.

[Geezer (OP)]

I had no desire to watch the opening ceremony, but ‘er indoors insisted, and ‘er indoors must be obeyed.

I thought the first 9,097 hours (that’s how long it seemed to me) was a tedious depiction of life in Britain during the Industrial Revolution. A bunch of seemingly unchoreographed plebs, meandering about doing little or nothing. Not exactly the height of excitement, let alone an image of Great Britain being the sort of ‘great’ you would want to a............

You sort of lost me a bit there Don. Are you saying your were impressed, or otherwise?

[bizerl]

I didn't watch it myself. Being in Australia and ten hours in front of it meant that sleep was far more important.

But Don, you are a treasure! They should have spent less time on the whole industrial revolution and had a big whinging pom parade! With Don leading the charge out front.

Thank you Don, for maintaining my image of a stereotypical British old guy! Maybe you should start a whinging thread... 

[Don_1]

I didn't watch it myself. Being in Australia and ten hours in front of it meant that sleep was far more important.

But Don, you are a treasure! They should have spent less time on the whole industrial revolution and had a big whinging pom parade! With Don leading the charge out front.

Thank you Don, for maintaining my image of a stereotypical British old guy! Maybe you should start a whinging thread... 

I aim to please!

Whinging Pom??? You ain't heard nothing yet.

Hmmm, maybe I could win an Olympic Gold for it.

[Don_1]

I had no desire to watch the opening ceremony, but ‘er indoors insisted, and ‘er indoors must be obeyed.

I thought the first 9,097 hours (that’s how long it seemed to me) was a tedious depiction of life in Britain during the Industrial Revolution. A bunch of seemingly unchoreographed plebs, meandering about doing little or nothing. Not exactly the height of excitement, let alone an image of Great Britain being the sort of ‘great’ you would want to a............

You sort of lost me a bit there Don. Are you saying your were impressed, or otherwise?

Silly arse! Gave me a laugh though.

[Don_1]

schneebfloob, you really have taken my diatribe a little too seriously, but just to put you straight on your points:-

Organisers of the Olympics have criticised those selling their torches’ for making a profit out of the Olympics. Strange, I have seen no such criticism of the corporate giants like Coca Cola, McDonalds, Visa, Omega and BMW doing exactly the same.

Would these be the corporate giants who've made the event possible by making up more than 90% of the total funding?

No. These would be the corporate giants who made up just under 50% of the funding, with no individual sponsor putting up more than £0.04bn. Pocket money for the likes of Adidas, BMW, BP, BT and British Airways for worldwide exposure over the course of the Olympic and Paralympic games.

Not to mention a license to print money for those with exclusivity, such as McDonalds, Coca Cola and Visa.

Want a Wimpy or Burger King? Tough. Want a Pepsi or J₂O? Tough. You can have a Big Mac and Coke, like it or lump it. How would you like to pay? Mastercard? Tough, only Visa cards accepted.

A friend's son works at the ***best not say***. He cycles to work and takes his sandwiches and a coke with him. He has been banned from using his cycle, banned from bringing sandwiches and coke for the duration. As he must enter ***best not say*** to get to work, he cannot take in a cycle and can only consume food and drink purchased from the sponsors outlet in the ***best not say***.

Public funding = £9.3bn
IOC funding =£0.7bn
Broadcast rights = £0.7bn
Ticket sales = £0.6bn
Sponsors = £10.7bn
Source - ODA, Government Olympic Communication 2012, DCMS

I thought the first 9,097 hours (that’s how long it seemed to me) was a tedious depiction of life in Britain during the Industrial Revolution. A bunch of seemingly unchoreographed plebs, meandering about doing little or nothing. Not exactly the height of excitement, let alone an image of Great Britain being the sort of ‘great’ you would want to advertise. A time of great inequality between the upper classes and the working classes. Poor standards of education, if any, for the working class children, poor or unaffordable healthcare, poor housing, poor nutrition, great child mortality, no job security, long working hours, low wages, poor and even positively dangerous working conditions, austerity, Rickets, TB etc etc etc.

Like it or not, that is our history. You can either sit there and be ashamed of it, or you could actually acknowledge that the Industrial Revolution was arguably the greatest force of social change that has emerged in the history of humanity. That started here. That is what we've given the world. Personally, I feel rather proud of it and I'm sick of people apologising for it on my behalf.

I am not apologising for anyone. The fact remains that the rich got richer at the expense of the working classes who suffered in the ways I have described. This continues to this day in the likes of India and the inequality continues there, here and around the world.

The Dambusters March??? Oh! Very good, that wont offend anyone will it??? A celebration of the RAF’s 617 squadron attack on the dams of the Ruhr Valley during WWII. That should please the German contingent. Why not get a Lancaster Bomber flanked by a Hurricane and a Spitfire to do a fly-past and have a neon sign displaying the legend ‘We won the war’!

Again, that is our heritage. And also again, I'm sick of people apologising on my behalf. This isn't about appeasing Germany. It happened. An awful lot of people consider the actions of our brave troops in the world wars to be an integral part of our history, and underline what it means to be British. It shouldn't be ignored or brushed aside, or anything else. It is a part of who we are, whether you like it or not.

Again, I am not apologising for anyone. It happened, yes, and if anyone should apologise, it is the Germans, and they did, a long time ago. And they paid for their errors. Now it is in the past, we are friends and allies. I don't wish to appease the Germans, they do need appeasing, just to be treated as we would any other friendly nation, without bringing up the past.

Twenty – seven – million – pounds! Twenty – seven – million pounds!!!

£27million pounds, for an advert that reached more than 1billion people across the globe live. Not to mention the millions more who went on to read about it in the foreign press -- it has been celebrated in the American media like the NYTimes; in Australia; in the Times of India; in China; across the entire globe. You may sniff now, but London's laughing all the way to the bank. That advert has made London the place to be, and it's an advert that's going to attract people to London for years to come, never mind the country as a whole. In the short term, yeah, sure, whatever, tourists are down. In 2-3 years time? The returns from the advertising will more than make up for £27million.

Not a very good advertising campaign in my opinion.

Toursits come from around the world to see such sights as St Paul's, Westminster, The Tower & Tower Bridge, Buckingham Palace, Trafalgar Sq, Windsor Castle, the Cutty Sark, Royal Observatory & line of 0^o, the parks, the museums, the galleries, theaters, black cabs, double deck buses, Harrods, Oxford St, Regent St, Bond St, Piccadilly, The Strand etc etc etc. All well known throughout the world. They spend around £30bn a year. These are London's attractions. They will go on to places like Bath, Canterbury and Stonehenge in the south to York, Lancaster and Edinburgh in the north. They will not come to see where the Olympic's were held, if the Stadium is still there.

Attractions, retailers and other businesses which benefit from the tourist trade are feeling the pinch due to our usual tourists staying away. The Olympic visitors are no substitute. Businesses which depend on the tourist trade have just the height of the tourist season in which to make their money. They are missing out because the tourists are staying away in their droves.

This isn't about appeasing Germany.

No, it is supposed to be about sport and friendship, not advertising global conglomerates. Just like everything else, the grasping, mucky paws of corperate greed are perverting the Olympics.

[Don_1]

  Give up the puns - you're wasted at punning, you should rent yourself out to provide excoriation and criticism

Anyone know of a good agent?

But give up the puns! Never!

[schneebfloob]

It appears I made a mistake with the funding. I had heard the figure of 90% in a tv interview, which it appears was being applied to LOCOG. oops.

"The fact remains that the rich got richer at the expense of the working classes who suffered in the ways I have described."

Yes, they did. Does that in any way, shape or form diminish the spectacle of the Opening Ceremony? No, it doesn't. Is the Industrial Revolution something worth being celebrated despite this? Yes, it is.

"I don't wish to appease the Germans, they do need appeasing, just to be treated as we would any other friendly nation, without bringing up the past."

Except that our past with Germany happens to make up a substantial part of our history. Yes, we've made up. We've forgiven each other, but that doesn't mean it should be forgotten. We are right to celebrate the actions of our troops in the world wars. That segment of the Dambusters wasn't a statement on our attitude towards Germany, but towards our armed forces.

"Not a very good advertising campaign in my opinion.

Toursits come from around the world to see such sights as St Paul's, Westminster, The Tower & Tower Bridge, Buckingham Palace, Trafalgar Sq, Windsor Castle, the Cutty Sark, Royal Observatory & line of 0o, the parks, the museums, the galleries, theaters, black cabs, double deck buses, Harrods, Oxford St, Regent St, Bond St, Piccadilly, The Strand etc etc etc. All well known throughout the world. They spend around £30bn a year. These are London's attractions. They will go on to places like Bath, Canterbury and Stonehenge in the south to York, Lancaster and Edinburgh in the north. They will not come to see where the Olympic's were held, if the Stadium is still there."

You've completely missed the point. It's the country that's been advertised. People will have watched that and decided perhaps they'd like to come to the UK. You're right in saying they're likely not going to visit the Olympic Site, but that's not what was being advertised. That's why the opening ceremony is supposed to be a celebration of our history and culture; to show the world what else we have to offer.

"They are missing out because the tourists are staying away in their droves. "

As I pointed out in my original post, at the moment that's correct. In 2-3 years time we'll probably see the real effects and increased tourism.

"No, it is supposed to be about sport and friendship, not advertising global conglomerates. Just like everything else, the grasping, mucky paws of corperate greed are perverting the Olympics."

It is supposed to be about sport and friendship. Unfortunately, we live in a time of hardship and economic downturn and as such it wouldn't have been possible to put on a show of this scale without the input of those "mucky paws". They demand something in return for their money, and that's advertising. I don't think that's unreasonable. They're a necessary evil.

[graham.d]

Despite the eloquent grumblings of Don_1, I have to say I enjoyed the whole shebang and I gather so did a lot of people around the world - and certainly the vast majority in the stadium. Don, whilst I agree with some of your general criticism, and it was a glossing over the low points of British history, but then what would they have portrayed instead - the support for the slave trade (though it was Britain that eventually abolished it), the results of the enclosure act that saw many starve or be forced to emigrate, the poor judgement of the leaders during WW1, the bombing of Dresden in WW2 - well that would have been a bunch of laughs wouldn't it? In defence I would say it was a clever and interesting view of Britain's history and not totally one sided. As a right wing Tory MP complained it was too lefty it probably means they got it about right.

Still it is also very British to have a whinge. A friend of mine who went to see the women's footy between Brazil and GB (his wife's Brazillian) was appalled when he was charged £14.50 for two pints of beer and two cokes. However, he and his family still enjoyed the occasion.

As a confirmed nerd I was really impressed with the illusions in the opening ceremony - especially the forging of the rings dripping with molten metal - took a bit of though to pull that off, and a lot of the other stuff too. Whatever the motivations various parties had to put on such a show, I would have to say they did a fine and impressive job.

[imatfaal]

Two pints and two soft drinks for the ladies and change from 20 quid??? why weren't they charging proper London prices?

I did have to explain to several of the older generation that the little black panels by the seats were the lights that made the light-show in the opening ceremony - I was then told by two elderly people that I was wrong and the lights around the stadium were just special effects for those of us watching on tv; but they loved it so I wasn't gonna get all contradictory and technical.