81

Just Chat! / Re: Punning is hard(ly) work! Is groaning aloud here?

« on: 03/12/2015 12:39:04 »

🎼When Johnny comes marching home again, hurrah, hurrah...

Would an equivalent British lyric be

🎼When Tommy comes marching home again huzzah huzzah



What song might this be?
[diagram=762_0]
Yankee Doodle.

82

Just Chat! / Re: Punning is hard(ly) work! Is groaning aloud here?

« on: 03/12/2015 12:17:37 »

Look's like you've been sold a pup.

soda pop?

Yes, it's sodalicious!

So da gloves are off are they?

83

Just Chat! / Re: Recent advertisements.

« on: 03/12/2015 12:07:43 »

Actually, I find these 'targeted' ads, whatever site they may be on, are often way off target.

For example, before signing in here today, I saw an ad for an anti malware programme. Why might that be? The answer is because my anti malware programme subscription needed renewing, so I was on the site to do just that.

Over the past few weeks I have searched on line for a tool for my son-in-law, scooters for the grandchildren and a new android and handbag for the misses. (Yes that should be Missus, but she is so clumsy she so often misses!) Consequently, ads for these items crop up frequently.

Now I can understand that ads for handbags might continue, since I bought said weapon accessory from House of Fraser* in the Lakeside mall.

But the tool & scooters were bought on line, so why do the ads still appear?

Search engines do not seem to able to register that I have made my purchase and, therefore, have no further interest in buying. Targeting me with ads for scooters is pointless. So, Mr Google & Mr Bing (not Crosby, I hasten to add) You really do need to re-think advertising placement. Ad-sense really makes no sense if it is preaching to the converted.

* Suitable remuneration is expected for this Don_1 applied advert.

84

Just Chat! / Re: Punning is hard(ly) work! Is groaning aloud here?

« on: 02/12/2015 11:43:05 »

Look's like you've been sold a pup.

85

Just Chat! / Re: Punning is hard(ly) work! Is groaning aloud here?

« on: 02/12/2015 11:40:49 »

I guess that was The Last Hurrah!

🎼Hurrah you with last night,
    Under the pale moonlight.

86

Just Chat! / Re: Punning is hard(ly) work! Is groaning aloud here?

« on: 02/12/2015 11:16:37 »

...... one good 'ed 'it deserves another...

That's what I call good 'ed 'itting.

87

Just Chat! / Re: Punning is hard(ly) work! Is groaning aloud here?

« on: 30/11/2015 13:30:29 »

I stand cornected !

corn u copia with all these corrections?

88

Just Chat! / Re: Punning is hard(ly) work! Is groaning aloud here?

« on: 30/11/2015 13:26:26 »

The ater of cold meats.

Pardon my bad grammar** that should be 'eater'.


** That's Grammar in the bottom right hand of the picture, or is it Grandpa?

89

General Science / Re: When driving a truck in windy conditions, what speed is safest?

« on: 30/11/2015 13:06:55 »

As I wrote before, there are far too many variables to come up with an equation which would be meaningful.

While some of these variables would be fixed (according to the trailer construction) others would be set by the load, thus remaining constant for that particular journey while others would remain variable throughout the journey.

Trailer fixed variables would be:
Length of trailer.
Trailer deck to roof height.
Rigid or curtain sides or tilt. Flatbeds would add more variables to the load variables.
Anti underrun design: none, bare bars or enclosed bars. I don't know about the US, but in the EU anti underrun is compulsory.
Trailer aero-dynamics.
Number of axles.
With or without rear-steer.
Pneumatic adjustable suspension.

The towing unit would also add variables dependant on its aerodynamics and position of the 5th. wheel, both of which will effect airflow over, under and around the trailer. The height of the 5th. wheel, relative to the rear axles of the trailer would set the trailer attitude variable. However, this attitude variable of the trailer and its height from the road will be further effected by the load distribution.

Next come the load variables:
Total weight of load.
Front - back centre of gravity.
Height of centre of gravity.

While the total weight of the load is easy to determine, The centre of gravity could be extremely difficult,  if not nigh on impossible to determine, especially with a mixed freight load. Since the centre of gravity would be one of the most important variables to establish, any error in this factor would render any equation worthless.

If you were to load 23t in Denver and drop off 4t in Laramie, then a further 3t in Casper before continuing to your final destination in Buffalo, your total weight and your centre of gravity will change at each drop off point. Add to that a 2t load from Douglas and a further 4t load from Kaycee and you'll spend more time calculating than driving.


Lastly are the journey variables and these can change from second to second and yard to yard.
Wind speed.
Wind direction.
Road direction.
Turbulence caused by the lie of the land and even the bow wave of other vehicles.
G force exerted through bends.

One variable here would not only be constantly changing but changing so fast and to such a degree, not to mention totally unpredictable is wind speed. While the wind speed may be fluctuating at +/- 10mph around 40mph, there can always be a 'freak' gust of 60+ mph.

As a professional driver, I'm sure that like me, you know the 'feel' of your truck. You can only use your experience to tell you when conditions are becoming such that you need to slow down and be ready for anything.
 

90

Just Chat! / Re: Punning is hard(ly) work! Is groaning aloud here?

« on: 27/11/2015 12:11:02 »

Are you finished in there yet???

u huru up will you PLEEEEZE

I *am*




ing!

Well, three cheers for that!

Hip hip hurry, hip hip hurry, hip hip.... too late!

91

Just Chat! / Re: Punning is hard(ly) work! Is groaning aloud here?

« on: 27/11/2015 12:03:26 »

"Thanksgiving has no place in British tradition. "

So sayeth The Independent.

Not so, Independent. In the USA 'Thanksgiving' is celebrated on the 4th Thursday of November and in Canada on the on the 2nd Monday of October. In Britain, where it is known as 'Harvest Festival', it has been celebrated since pagan times on the occurrence of the Harvest Moon (the nearest full moon to the autumn equinox (22 or 23 September).
This celebration of the harvest is common to many countries and falls in line with their harvest time.
Saxon's, settled in Britain from around AD 43. The Anglo-Saxon farmers would offer the first sheaf of corn to the god of fertility to ensure a good crop the following year. The last sheaf (believed to contain the Spirit of the corn) was cut along with the ritual sacrifice of an animal (usually a hare) and the straw made into an effigy of the animal. This eventually gave rise to the Corn Dolly.

"Thanksgiving is the latest US tradition to take root in the UK, as one in six of us celebrate 'Brits-giving'

Hmmm, Methinks you're about 2000 yrs out and should be looking across the channel to Germany, not the Atlantic to 'The New World'.


So to keep in line with this thread's subject....

".....more of us are gobbling turkey and pumpkin pie..."

I would rather a slice of punkin pie, if you don't mind.

92

Just Chat! / Re: Punning is hard(ly) work! Is groaning aloud here?

« on: 25/11/2015 00:41:49 »

Are you finished in there yet???

u huru up will you PLEEEEZE

93

Just Chat! / Re: Punning is hard(ly) work! Is groaning aloud here?

« on: 25/11/2015 00:38:43 »

Its tissue Jim, but not as we know it.

Now what do I do about the Klingons?

I blame the height of the pan, its just su lu.

94

Just Chat! / Re: Punning is hard(ly) work! Is groaning aloud here?

« on: 24/11/2015 00:58:44 »

Did you spock the pun in my last post?

95

Just Chat! / Re: What happens when we die?

« on: 24/11/2015 00:51:34 »

In my opinion there is nothing after death, at least not for the deceased.

Proving that would be impossible.

96

General Science / Re: Combating Laser Beaming

« on: 24/11/2015 00:47:57 »

This is a disturbing escalation of this problem.

http://www.theguardian.com/world/2015/nov/23/ba-pilots-eye-damaged-by-military-laser-shone-into-cockpit-at-heathrow

97

Just Chat! / Re: Punning is hard(ly) work! Is groaning aloud here?

« on: 23/11/2015 00:46:03 »

Perhaps that'll teach him not to pick hard on the toilet roll in future.

98

Just Chat! / Re: Punning is hard(ly) work! Is groaning aloud here?

« on: 19/11/2015 12:35:03 »

It was the Scottish Indoor Tennis Championships.

In the bar a bowl of peanuts was accidentally knocked on to the floor.
“Guve me the Hoover, Jock, I’ll clean that oop.” Said a barman.
“Och, I’m afraid the Hoover is broken Jimmy.” Replied the head barman.
“Oh dear ohh dear. If we’ve got no vac Jock, I’ll fetch the dustpan & brush then.
“Och, that’s andy, murry-up then afore they get trodden into the carpet.”

99

Just Chat! / Re: Punning is hard(ly) work! Is groaning aloud here?

« on: 19/11/2015 12:19:44 »

November 19th.

Today is National Blow Bagpipes Day Coincidentally it is also National Have a Bad Day Day.

What’s more today is also Nouveau Beaujolais Day and World Toilet Day, another coincidence???

100

Cells, Microbes & Viruses / Re: Can exessive consumption of carrot juice kill you?

« on: 19/11/2015 11:54:08 »

As BC wrote, too much of anything can kill you, but oh boy, would be able to see well in the dark.*

Trouble is, daylight might be painful and dangerous (a la Riddick).


*This is a myth.