even neutrinos at close range have virtual electron positron pairs around them inside their uncertainty period so they can exhibit some interactions as if they were charged particles.

OK, I am not going to claim to understand the mathematics around this, but it does make me somewhat wonder:

Given the short range of of the weak force, so the position of this virtual particle pair must be highly constrained. If we assume them to be an electron-positron pair, then their rest mass is known. If the strength of the weak force is a consequence of the velocity of the virtual pair, then the momentum of the pair must be calculable by knowing the strength of the field involved. Is there enough latitude in all of this for the necessary uncertainty of the momentum and position required by Heisenberg?

Also, how is the virtual pair bound to the neutrino? Virtual pairs exist (assuming they exist at all) everywhere - so why would the effect only be visible close to some particles?