Just when you thought it was safe to go back on the Forum

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Offline Make it Lady

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I'm back from Newquay rather wetter than I went. Did some body boarding in my full wet suit, went to Jamie Olivers restruant on the beach, got so wet on a cycle ride that I got trench bottom and ate lots and lots of cream teas. We had a granny's tea in one Tea Shop. We had tea, scones and cakes and sandwiches. Freddy said that if a granny ate all this her intestines would explode!!!!
Watched lots of the olympics in our pad overlooking the sea and also watched Jaws to scare the pants off the kids.
Give a man a fire and he is warm for a day, set a man on fire and he is warm for the rest of his life.

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Offline neilep

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« Reply #1 on: 26/08/2008 21:43:14 »
I hope the pants have found a nice secluded sanctuary to resolve their fear of Jaws !

Gosh !...me wants to go to Jamies resturant...but my Jamie is only three and the only thing he can cook is a pile of poo in a potty !...(michelin star pending methinks)

Trench Juicy Peach eh ?...poor ewe !.....what's the treatment ?..lots of spanking and and iron to relieve the creases ?...hope it gets better soon...

...reminds me , when in Nam as a vet sheep I dug a trench and displayed my wooly bum to distract the foe...it worked !.....but some found it quite fetching....Ended up quite sore !

Hmmmm..cream teas...soooooooooo not fair !.......scones ?..clotted cream..jam ?..oh my !! *le jealousy*

welcome home Shaz !
Men are the same as women, just inside out !

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Offline Make it Lady

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« Reply #2 on: 26/08/2008 21:53:51 »
I have a very silly wet suit sunburn as well!!!
Give a man a fire and he is warm for a day, set a man on fire and he is warm for the rest of his life.

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Offline JimBob

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« Reply #3 on: 26/08/2008 23:44:57 »
I have a very silly wet suit sunburn as well!!!

Just HOW is this possible? This statement is sending my fecund imagination into spasms.
The mind is like a parachute. It works best when open.  -- A. Einstein

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Offline turnipsock

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« Reply #4 on: 27/08/2008 00:00:52 »
I have a very silly wet suit sunburn as well!!!

It can't be as bad as the cycling helmet sunburn I get. All those vents, are they really neccessary?
« Last Edit: 27/08/2008 00:02:44 by turnipsock »
Beeswax: Natures petrol tank sealant.

When things are in 3D, is it always the same three dimensions?

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Offline neilep

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« Reply #5 on: 27/08/2008 01:08:44 »
I have a very silly wet suit sunburn as well!!!

It can't be as bad as the cycling helmet sunburn I get. All those vents, are they really neccessary?

But think of the bright side...your head now makes a very fetching zebra crossing for head lice..(should ewe have any !)


........here's a LINK for our USA chums whom I believe do not enjoy zebra crossing goodness !!..........well, I never seen one there and I've been five times (notice the boast !)
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Offline Karen W.

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« Reply #6 on: 27/08/2008 01:16:52 »
I have never laid my eyes on a real live Zebra either.. let alone the crossing! Thanks for the link Neily! LOL..

Sorry for your stripes Turnipsock!

"Life is not measured by the number of Breaths we take, but by the moments that take our breath away."

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Offline Make it Lady

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« Reply #7 on: 27/08/2008 22:08:43 »
Wet suit sunburn is a little like cycle shorts sunburn but you get diagonal lines instead of straight ones.
Give a man a fire and he is warm for a day, set a man on fire and he is warm for the rest of his life.

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Offline rosalind dna

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« Reply #8 on: 27/08/2008 22:38:40 »
Nice to have you back, Sharon then I've had to be away since I've
had ISP/computer problems sorted now thank goodness
Rosalind Franklin was my first cousin and one my life's main regrets is that I never met this brilliant and beautiful lady.
She discovered the Single DNA Helix in 1953, then it was taken by Wilkins without her knowledge or agreeement.

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Offline JimBob

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« Reply #9 on: 27/08/2008 23:10:10 »
Wet suit sunburn is a little like cycle shorts sunburn but you get diagonal lines instead of straight ones.

So it really is wet, not dry as most "wet" suits? What is this terminology. Convolutions to drive the normal, well read and educated human beings into spasms of brain freeze?
The mind is like a parachute. It works best when open.  -- A. Einstein

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Offline rosalind dna

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« Reply #10 on: 27/08/2008 23:38:37 »
Wet suit sunburn is a little like cycle shorts sunburn but you get diagonal lines instead of straight ones.

So it really is wet, not dry as most "wet" suits? What is this terminology. Convolutions to drive the normal, well read and educated human beings into spasms of brain freeze?

HI Jimbob what proof do you have of "brain freeze"  because it sounds like a tale of sorts.
Rosalind Franklin was my first cousin and one my life's main regrets is that I never met this brilliant and beautiful lady.
She discovered the Single DNA Helix in 1953, then it was taken by Wilkins without her knowledge or agreeement.

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Offline Don_1

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« Reply #11 on: 28/08/2008 08:37:50 »
You claim to have some form of sunburn, might I suggest, given the weather situation, this may be rust!!!
If brains were made of dynamite, I wouldn't have enough to blow my nose.

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Offline neilep

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« Reply #12 on: 28/08/2008 12:51:02 »
Wet suit sunburn is a little like cycle shorts sunburn but you get diagonal lines instead of straight ones.

Picture pleeeze !!
Men are the same as women, just inside out !

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Offline Make it Lady

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« Reply #13 on: 28/08/2008 20:58:18 »
It is not a pretty sight! It may cause retching.

JimBob you can get wet suits and dry suits. Wet suits do let water through but keep you warm for longer.
Give a man a fire and he is warm for a day, set a man on fire and he is warm for the rest of his life.

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Offline JimBob

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« Reply #14 on: 28/08/2008 21:53:57 »
Must be confusing for you.
The mind is like a parachute. It works best when open.  -- A. Einstein

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Offline neilep

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« Reply #15 on: 28/08/2008 22:19:54 »
Is this what happens when you fart in wetsuit ?



[attachment=4336]

Men are the same as women, just inside out !

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Offline Make it Lady

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« Reply #16 on: 28/08/2008 22:25:52 »
What a kinky black sheep you are!
Give a man a fire and he is warm for a day, set a man on fire and he is warm for the rest of his life.

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Offline Karen W.

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« Reply #17 on: 29/08/2008 15:03:18 »
Is this what happens when you fart in wetsuit ?



[attachment=4336]



HEE HEE HEE HEE.. LOL LOL LOL.. Where in the world did you find that picture!

What on earth are you doing in that suit Kind Sir! LOL.. looks like a fish lip invitation! LOL..LOL..
« Last Edit: 29/08/2008 15:06:23 by Karen W. »

"Life is not measured by the number of Breaths we take, but by the moments that take our breath away."

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Offline Make it Lady

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« Reply #18 on: 29/08/2008 18:32:07 »
Pin anyone?
Give a man a fire and he is warm for a day, set a man on fire and he is warm for the rest of his life.

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Offline JimBob

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« Reply #19 on: 29/08/2008 23:31:21 »
Surely you wouldn't want to ***** that!
The mind is like a parachute. It works best when open.  -- A. Einstein

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Offline JimBob

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« Reply #20 on: 29/08/2008 23:33:15 »
Surely you wouldn't want to ***** that!

Starts wit "P ends with "K" and means "to stick with a pin" Sheesh, you thing the censor would a word like that? We don't have dirty minds!
The mind is like a parachute. It works best when open.  -- A. Einstein

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Offline Make it Lady

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« Reply #21 on: 30/08/2008 21:26:52 »
That is not how you spell puncture!
Give a man a fire and he is warm for a day, set a man on fire and he is warm for the rest of his life.

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Offline JimBob

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« Reply #22 on: 31/08/2008 03:00:34 »
That is not how you spell puncture!

AH, how you disappoint me, woman!
The mind is like a parachute. It works best when open.  -- A. Einstein

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Offline Karen W.

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« Reply #23 on: 31/08/2008 08:59:23 »
Ah sleeping beauty's finger is still sore from the spinning wheels sharp needle!

"Life is not measured by the number of Breaths we take, but by the moments that take our breath away."

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Offline Make it Lady

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« Reply #24 on: 31/08/2008 22:05:53 »
Yes but if prince charming turned up in an inflated wet suit, I'd be a little disappointed. Trouble is everytime I kiss a prince they turn slowly into frogs.
Give a man a fire and he is warm for a day, set a man on fire and he is warm for the rest of his life.

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Offline JimBob

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« Reply #25 on: 31/08/2008 23:35:43 »
Perhaps you should change your "p*icking" criteria.
The mind is like a parachute. It works best when open.  -- A. Einstein

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Offline Make it Lady

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« Reply #26 on: 01/09/2008 15:11:14 »
Riviting
Give a man a fire and he is warm for a day, set a man on fire and he is warm for the rest of his life.

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Offline Karen W.

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« Reply #27 on: 01/09/2008 20:10:35 »
Yes but if prince charming turned up in an inflated wet suit, I'd be a little disappointed. Trouble is everytime I kiss a prince they turn slowly into frogs.

Hee hee.. Yeah The only time I kissed a prince he turned into a frog of a sort!

"Life is not measured by the number of Breaths we take, but by the moments that take our breath away."

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Offline Make it Lady

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« Reply #28 on: 03/09/2008 20:40:47 »
Kissing frogs usually means you get lots of french lovers!
Give a man a fire and he is warm for a day, set a man on fire and he is warm for the rest of his life.

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Offline Karen W.

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« Reply #29 on: 03/09/2008 21:25:16 »
OH dear!! Then I must have kissed something else!

"Life is not measured by the number of Breaths we take, but by the moments that take our breath away."

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Offline Make it Lady

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« Reply #30 on: 03/09/2008 21:34:35 »
You'd know if you'd kissed something else because they are something else!!!!
Give a man a fire and he is warm for a day, set a man on fire and he is warm for the rest of his life.

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Offline neilep

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« Reply #31 on: 03/09/2008 21:38:55 »
If perchance, ewe kiss my arse
Hold your breath and make it last !
Men are the same as women, just inside out !

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Offline Make it Lady

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« Reply #32 on: 03/09/2008 21:45:46 »
I am the Make it Lady not the Make it Last. I can run a last over your arse if you want.
Give a man a fire and he is warm for a day, set a man on fire and he is warm for the rest of his life.

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Offline neilep

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« Reply #33 on: 03/09/2008 21:51:34 »
I am the Make it Lady not the Make it Last. I can run a last over your arse if you want.

If My bot is smacked much harder
Perhaps you'll apply a sticky plaster ?
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Offline Make it Lady

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« Reply #34 on: 03/09/2008 21:55:34 »
This is not the rhyming thread Neil,
So stop it lets keep the forum real!
Give a man a fire and he is warm for a day, set a man on fire and he is warm for the rest of his life.

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Offline Karen W.

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« Reply #35 on: 03/09/2008 21:55:59 »
Holding my breath is hard to do
especially when you smell like POOOOOOOO!!LOL

"Life is not measured by the number of Breaths we take, but by the moments that take our breath away."

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Offline Make it Lady

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« Reply #36 on: 03/09/2008 21:58:37 »
You didn't do it you little strumpet,
He's always chasing bits of crumpet
Give a man a fire and he is warm for a day, set a man on fire and he is warm for the rest of his life.

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Offline neilep

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« Reply #37 on: 03/09/2008 22:00:38 »
You didn't do it you little strumpet,
He's always chasing bits of crumpet


Hmmm buttered crumpet nice and hot
On the list cos I haven't got !


ok ok...I'll stop rhyming here
Cos my words are like verbal diarrhoea
Men are the same as women, just inside out !

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Offline Make it Lady

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« Reply #38 on: 03/09/2008 22:14:35 »
Diarrhoea is hard to spell,
But always leaves a nasty smell.
Give a man a fire and he is warm for a day, set a man on fire and he is warm for the rest of his life.

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Offline Karen W.

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« Reply #39 on: 03/09/2008 22:15:42 »
Hot and buttered and oh so good..

are you really sure that you really should?

"Life is not measured by the number of Breaths we take, but by the moments that take our breath away."

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Offline Karen W.

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« Reply #40 on: 03/09/2008 22:17:45 »
Diarrhoea is hard to spell,
But always leaves a nasty smell.

Yes it is and so here goes, make sure when done you clean your toes!

DIARRHEA!!

"Life is not measured by the number of Breaths we take, but by the moments that take our breath away."

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Offline Make it Lady

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« Reply #41 on: 03/09/2008 22:20:08 »
You missed out an O
This girl has far to go!
Give a man a fire and he is warm for a day, set a man on fire and he is warm for the rest of his life.

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Offline JimBob

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« Reply #42 on: 04/09/2008 03:40:11 »
Dang, Wil Shakespeare you guys ain't - Not even Ezra Pound!

I think I'll look into the lost and found.
The mind is like a parachute. It works best when open.  -- A. Einstein

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Offline Make it Lady

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« Reply #43 on: 06/09/2008 20:13:33 »
JimBob, don't give up the day job!
Give a man a fire and he is warm for a day, set a man on fire and he is warm for the rest of his life.

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Offline JimBob

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« Reply #44 on: 07/09/2008 02:14:36 »
WHAT day job? Oh, you mean being King of Wales? That isn't a job, its a birthright!
The mind is like a parachute. It works best when open.  -- A. Einstein

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Offline Make it Lady

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« Reply #45 on: 07/09/2008 21:52:34 »
King of Whales more like.
Give a man a fire and he is warm for a day, set a man on fire and he is warm for the rest of his life.

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Offline JimBob

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« Reply #46 on: 08/09/2008 03:46:57 »
Madam, my weight has nothing to do with your fantasies of what or who I represent. Wales seems to thing I am svelte. Of course, they have no fantasies, my people have seen me.
The mind is like a parachute. It works best when open.  -- A. Einstein

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Offline Karen W.

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« Reply #47 on: 09/09/2008 08:38:54 »
Perhaps you should change your "p*icking" criteria.

yes.. I give up, that fixes everything!

"Life is not measured by the number of Breaths we take, but by the moments that take our breath away."

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Offline Make it Lady

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« Reply #48 on: 10/09/2008 17:52:22 »
No that bursts everything!
Give a man a fire and he is warm for a day, set a man on fire and he is warm for the rest of his life.

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Offline Make it Lady

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« Reply #49 on: 10/09/2008 17:53:13 »
It was my 19th wedding anniversay yesterday. Some people get less time for murder!
Give a man a fire and he is warm for a day, set a man on fire and he is warm for the rest of his life.