Lets Build A Machine

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Offline Machinemaker

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« on: 28/01/2009 22:23:09 »


Dear Naked Science Forum

As your such a talented and diverse bunch i wanted to try a little experiment coming up with the plans for an imaginary machine.

Here's how its going to work:

for example

I will say the machine will be 17 miles wide

and then somebody will possibly reply by saying the machine will be made of gold

and then somebody else will reply and so on and so forth

its a bit like a game of word association

So anybody who wants to take part just reply to this massage

don't hold back on imaginative ideas, it can be scientific or just the first thing that comes into your head

Many thanks in advance hopefully there will be some interesting results

I will Start:

The Machine will be 17 miles wide

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Offline Chemistry4me

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« Reply #1 on: 28/01/2009 23:18:59 »
It will have 68 wheels

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Offline DoctorBeaver

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« Reply #2 on: 28/01/2009 23:35:47 »
It will have a hydraulic arm.
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Offline Chemistry4me

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« Reply #3 on: 29/01/2009 00:52:22 »
It will be 27 miles high/tall.

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Offline DoctorBeaver

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« Reply #4 on: 29/01/2009 01:00:52 »
Red & black
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Offline DoctorBeaver

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« Reply #5 on: 29/01/2009 01:01:25 »
Is anyone going to try to draw this when it's finished?  [:D]
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Offline Chemistry4me

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« Reply #6 on: 29/01/2009 01:07:18 »
I'll try my best [;D]

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Offline JimBob

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« Reply #7 on: 29/01/2009 01:39:44 »
It will be made from crayons.
The mind is like a parachute. It works best when open.  -- A. Einstein

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Offline Chemistry4me

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« Reply #8 on: 29/01/2009 01:51:47 »
It will have 17000 rocket launchers, 34 nuclear power plants, and 13 rockets.

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Offline Karen W.

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« Reply #9 on: 29/01/2009 02:32:44 »
Welcome to the forum machineman!

6un idea!

It will house 7000 couples each in charge of a certain operations of the machine....etc....
it will also be solar and wind powered....
« Last Edit: 29/01/2009 02:38:58 by Karen W. »

"Life is not measured by the number of Breaths we take, but by the moments that take our breath away."

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Offline Chemistry4me

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« Reply #10 on: 29/01/2009 09:02:13 »
It will have wings 21 miles wide...each.

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Offline DoctorBeaver

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« Reply #11 on: 29/01/2009 12:54:05 »
Now you're being silly  [:D]
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Offline Madidus_Scientia

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« Reply #12 on: 29/01/2009 17:15:57 »
It will have at least 4 cupholders

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blakestyger

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« Reply #13 on: 29/01/2009 17:23:16 »
... and a Jelly Pocket.

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Offline Karen W.

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« Reply #14 on: 29/01/2009 18:42:04 »
It will be able to be amphibian like..... and water worthy!

"Life is not measured by the number of Breaths we take, but by the moments that take our breath away."

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Offline DoctorBeaver

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« Reply #15 on: 29/01/2009 19:48:07 »
With a butterfly net
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Offline Bored chemist

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« Reply #16 on: 29/01/2009 20:23:18 »
The microwave ovens will play the first couple of bars of Beethoven's ode to joy rather than going "ping!" when they have finished cooking stuff.

There will be a small sticker on it saying "Intel inside"- though this may not actually be true.

It will contain a substance known to the state of California to cause cancer.
Please disregard all previous signatures.

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Offline Make it Lady

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« Reply #17 on: 29/01/2009 20:35:47 »
Fred would like it to have a big gun that is on fire and a seat permanently reserved for Stalin(his hero.)
I would like all the food blenders on board to have no lids. I would also like the captain to be extremely handsome, so much so that women faint when they see him. The machine should also wear a skirt.
Give a man a fire and he is warm for a day, set a man on fire and he is warm for the rest of his life.

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Offline Chemistry4me

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« Reply #18 on: 30/01/2009 01:57:24 »
It will create an unlimited supply of ice-cream.

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Offline JimBob

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« Reply #19 on: 30/01/2009 02:08:40 »
It will create an unlimited supply of ice-cream.

It will continually give us just the correct supply of endorphins to keep us happy and functionally very sharp.
The mind is like a parachute. It works best when open.  -- A. Einstein

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Offline Karen W.

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« Reply #20 on: 30/01/2009 06:18:58 »
It will have a working transporter!

"Life is not measured by the number of Breaths we take, but by the moments that take our breath away."

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Offline Chemistry4me

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« Reply #21 on: 30/01/2009 06:28:45 »
It will be able to teleport to anywhere in the universe.

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Offline Karen W.

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« Reply #22 on: 30/01/2009 07:34:28 »
I get to go after the first 10 successful teleports with no problems!

This machine will be able to have 4 robotic operated Levels for which Vegetables plants etc are grown and harvested to feed and provide herbs for cooking and medicinal purposes etc...for the machines 7000 people!
« Last Edit: 30/01/2009 08:05:23 by Karen W. »

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Offline Don_1

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« Reply #23 on: 30/01/2009 08:10:05 »
It will run on four type AA batteries (Batteries included)
If brains were made of dynamite, I wouldn't have enough to blow my nose.

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Offline Karen W.

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« Reply #24 on: 30/01/2009 08:14:08 »
They must be rechargeable!

"Life is not measured by the number of Breaths we take, but by the moments that take our breath away."

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blakestyger

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« Reply #25 on: 30/01/2009 10:53:46 »
It will need a red light on top - for aircraft.

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Offline Karen W.

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« Reply #26 on: 30/01/2009 10:59:37 »
Some kind of Headlights for fog darkness etc.. better yet radar and super heat vision stuff like infra red sensors etc..

"Life is not measured by the number of Breaths we take, but by the moments that take our breath away."

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Offline LeeE

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« Reply #27 on: 30/01/2009 11:47:10 »
It should look as though it's upside-down when it's actually the right way up, but not visa-versa.  It's elbows should look like zeppelins.
...And its claws are as big as cups, and for some reason it's got a tremendous fear of stamps! And Mrs Doyle was telling me it's got magnets on its tail, so if you're made out of metal it can attach itself to you! And instead of a mouth it's got four arses!

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Offline Mirage

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« Reply #28 on: 30/01/2009 17:00:08 »
It must have a humping post.......just for fun and practice.

Plus it must have a horn that plays La Cucaracha

There must be a shrine floor.
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Offline Make it Lady

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« Reply #29 on: 30/01/2009 18:14:53 »
I thought it was already wind and solar powered!

It contains a foyer with a gin and tonic fountain.
Give a man a fire and he is warm for a day, set a man on fire and he is warm for the rest of his life.

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Offline Karen W.

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« Reply #30 on: 31/01/2009 00:12:22 »
It must have a humping post.......just for fun and practice.

Plus it must have a horn that plays La Cucaracha

There must be a shrine floor.
Will a nice shiny pole do for pole dancing too! LOL

 I like the music already! YAYYYYYYYYYYY!!!

"Life is not measured by the number of Breaths we take, but by the moments that take our breath away."

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Offline Karen W.

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« Reply #31 on: 31/01/2009 00:13:46 »
It must have a full service massage and hot tub saunas on one floor..

"Life is not measured by the number of Breaths we take, but by the moments that take our breath away."

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Offline Chemistry4me

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« Reply #32 on: 31/01/2009 03:43:18 »
It can be shrinked so that it fits into your pockets.

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Offline MonikaS

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« Reply #33 on: 31/01/2009 12:25:34 »
It will have a pink bow tie.
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Offline DoctorBeaver

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« Reply #34 on: 31/01/2009 16:28:24 »
Parking warning alarm in case a woman drives it
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Offline Make it Lady

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« Reply #35 on: 31/01/2009 18:32:36 »
.....or my husband!

The gin and tonic fountain will have a beaver lodge at one end.

The onboard hospital will only have sexy doctors and nurses. It also has a instant weight loss chamber so you can pig out and never get fat.
Give a man a fire and he is warm for a day, set a man on fire and he is warm for the rest of his life.

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Offline Chemistry4me

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« Reply #36 on: 31/01/2009 22:04:25 »
It also has a instant weight loss chamber so you can pig out and never get fat.
A vomitorium (vomitory)?

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Offline JimBob

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« Reply #37 on: 31/01/2009 22:37:15 »
It also has a instant weight loss chamber so you can pig out and never get fat.
A vomitorium (vomitory)?

Your Latin is correct ...

So we need air fresheners, a machine to convert the "effluvium" back into food, and - oh... FEATHERS!! Yes. Feathers - for to tickle the back of one's throat. (The wording is intentionally archaic in nature.)

The mind is like a parachute. It works best when open.  -- A. Einstein

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« Reply #38 on: 31/01/2009 23:29:49 »
It will have a pink bow tie.

Why does the machine have to be gay? Is this part of the world view that says everything must be included? If so then -

It should have only one leg.


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Offline Make it Lady

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« Reply #39 on: 31/01/2009 23:33:05 »
The one leg is very hairy and has those sock suspenders on it (and socks of course.) I'd like John cleeses leg if possible.
Give a man a fire and he is warm for a day, set a man on fire and he is warm for the rest of his life.

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Offline Karen W.

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« Reply #40 on: 01/02/2009 01:06:27 »
Parking warning alarm in case a woman drives it
And a built in GPS because a man won't ask for directions! LOL..

"Life is not measured by the number of Breaths we take, but by the moments that take our breath away."

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Offline Chemistry4me

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« Reply #41 on: 01/02/2009 01:59:41 »
It can do back flips.

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Offline Karen W.

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« Reply #42 on: 01/02/2009 06:40:52 »
cool!

"Life is not measured by the number of Breaths we take, but by the moments that take our breath away."

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Offline MonikaS

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« Reply #43 on: 01/02/2009 10:23:04 »
It will have a pink bow tie.

Why does the machine have to be gay? Is this part of the world view that says everything must be included? If so then -

It should have only one leg.



Have we discussed the gender of the machine already?
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Offline DoctorBeaver

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« Reply #44 on: 01/02/2009 14:22:29 »
It will have a pink bow tie.

Why does the machine have to be gay? Is this part of the world view that says everything must be included? If so then -

It should have only one leg.



And be a blind lesbian
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Offline LeeE

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« Reply #45 on: 01/02/2009 14:38:06 »
The one leg is very hairy and has those sock suspenders on it (and socks of course.) I'd like John cleeses leg if possible.

I think he's probably still using it atm.
...And its claws are as big as cups, and for some reason it's got a tremendous fear of stamps! And Mrs Doyle was telling me it's got magnets on its tail, so if you're made out of metal it can attach itself to you! And instead of a mouth it's got four arses!

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Offline DoctorBeaver

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« Reply #46 on: 01/02/2009 15:18:10 »
The one leg is very hairy and has those sock suspenders on it (and socks of course.) I'd like John cleeses leg if possible.

I think he's probably still using it atm.

I've heard he sits down a lot.
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Offline Make it Lady

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« Reply #47 on: 01/02/2009 18:46:22 »
It has a dish rack on the top so that when if moves along it air dries the washing up. It also has one of those wirly gig washing drier sticking out at the back like a tail.
Give a man a fire and he is warm for a day, set a man on fire and he is warm for the rest of his life.

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Offline Make it Lady

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« Reply #48 on: 01/02/2009 18:47:21 »
It has an energy saving lightbulb on its head that lights up when the captain has an idea.
Give a man a fire and he is warm for a day, set a man on fire and he is warm for the rest of his life.

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Offline DoctorBeaver

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« Reply #49 on: 01/02/2009 18:49:17 »
An Acme patent steamhammer for splatting Roadrunner  [:D]
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