Love

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Offline memasa

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Love
« on: 10/07/2005 14:15:02 »
What are the "mechanics" of falling in love?

What? Where? When? [:)]
Is it just our basic instict?
What characteristics make the other person desirable? Are there some sort of universal "rules" built-in our brains?
What happens in our brains when we fall in love?
Etc.

Can animals fall in love?

PLEASE TAKE THIS SERIOUSLY!

Any scientists of love around? Well, at least you're naked, that's a start. [;)]


"Nothing is certain but death and taxes."
Benjamin Franklin in 1789
« Last Edit: 10/07/2005 14:42:32 by memasa »
"Nothing is certain but death and taxes."
Benjamin Franklin in 1789

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Offline neilep

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Re: Love
« Reply #1 on: 10/07/2005 14:43:07 »
There are no mechanics to falling in love. Though there are mecahnical changes in the brain due to the strong emotions. It is not a ' thing ' that can be explained, written down or solved or elaborated on or defined like a disease, though it may feel like it, however it is a condition, and sometimes it hurts like a disease but it's a state of mind, emotional and sensual.

I think people have been asking WHAT love is since time began. The effect of love is easily described. Intensity of high regard for someone, when that person monopolises your every waking thought, a strong bond and union with an intense affection and desire, an urge so strong that people have died because of love, a feeling of euphoric intense attraction etc etc.

Where ?....anywhere !!!

When ?...any time !!

I'm sure it is an instinct characterised by a strong impulse. It's a natural inbuilt reaction to a part of your brain being stimulated. I know there are physical changes in the brain noticed during periods of strong emotions.

It's a point worth noting that it would be interesting to know how ' love' has manifested over thousands of years.

Gosh !!....as far as characteristics that make the other person desirable !!..wow !!..where do you start ?....It's completely and totally subjective....LOVE, comes after attractiveness and I suspect after you've got to know someone really really well...it could be based on intellectual properties, physical attributes, personality traits !!...probably many other options and/or a combination of all or a few of these. Don't confuse love with lust though. I think you have to get deep inside someones head, or they inside yours before you realise it's more than just ' attraction' but emotional too.

Personally, I think it's very debatable as to whether animals fall in love (remember...we're animals too, but I know what you mean)...anyway, you only have to witness the reaction of certain animals when companions are lost, dogs pine, elephants wallow and it seems this could well be interpreted as a form of love....I doubt we'll ever really know. Perhaps 'love' is just reserved for sentient beings....perhaps not.

Lets get some other opinions.


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Offline Andrew K Fletcher

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Re: Love
« Reply #2 on: 10/07/2005 14:57:29 »
When I met Jude, my wife, she was in the local public house with a few of her friends, I was alone, looked at her and she winked at me with a smile that warmed my heart. I knew she was the right person from day one.

I joined her and her friends for a drink and felt as if I had known her for all my life.
We celebrated our 25th wedding anniversary in March this year and I love her more than ever, we get along so well and share many interests together, also she puts up with my interests in science, and even allows me to conduct experiments on her (health related experiments that is) She is the most beautiful women in the world and makes my heart sing every time I gaze in her eyes. Her smile causes me to melt down and she is a great cook and mother to our two sons. She manages the money side of things with amazing skills and is queen of the Buy one get one free brigade in the supermarkets. Being separated from her for a few days is very hard for me, and I can’t wait to get back home to be close to her.

One Christmas eve we were attacked by six yobs in our home, they smashed the glass fronted door with a concrete flower pot and bashed my head up against the wall, yelling abuse constantly, and causing my head to bleed, and still I kept my cool, trying to get them to go home peacefully because I could see they were either drunk or on drugs. They were 28 year olds, not children.

Then one of them threatened my wife and said he was coming back to get her. Big mistake on his part, he spent Christmas in hospital with his friends. I ruined a perfectly good 3-foot spirit level and had to paint the side of my house because it was covered in their blood. On reading this, you may think that she is a poor defenceless women, and you would be wrong, she can hold her own and comes from a family of semi-professional boxers. She is more than happy to stand up to anyone that treads on her toes.

We seldom argue about anything, if we do it is usually nonsensical and trivial and always rectified as quickly as it ensues.

So love for me is finding my soul mate, whom I would gladly lay down my life to protect her and keep her safe. I cannot imagine what life would be like without her, because she makes me the richest man in the world.

As for animals falling in love, this is blatantly apparent among our pet bull terriers. They are definitely in love with us and each other, and cannot bare to be more than a few inches from us. We are constantly battling them for prime position on the couch, and often wake up with one or two of them snoring on our laps or wrapped around our necks. Even our Siamese cat Theo, who has now passed, loved the bully’s and always preferred to sleep with one next to him. And of course the bully’s loved him just the same and would often share their dinner with him gladly.

There you go, now you know a little more about love and a little about life in our home.

Andrew


Andrew


"The explanation requiring the fewest assumptions is most likely to be correct."
K.I.S. "Keep it simple!"
Science is continually evolving. Nothing is set in stone. Question everything and everyone. Always consider vested interests as a reason for miss-direction. But most of all explore and find answers that you are comfortable with

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Offline memasa

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Re: Love
« Reply #3 on: 10/07/2005 15:36:46 »
It's not that I haven't experienced love in my life. I'm only interested in knowing if there really is some theory of love. "Stupid" questions are always the best ones!


"Nothing is certain but death and taxes."
Benjamin Franklin in 1789
"Nothing is certain but death and taxes."
Benjamin Franklin in 1789

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Offline neilep

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Re: Love
« Reply #4 on: 10/07/2005 16:38:55 »
I just can't imagine  there being a theory of love !...hang on !!..I'll rephrase that. there's no hard and fast theory of love...yet !!...of course theories are just that aren't they ? based on repeated observations and intellectual speculations (science peeps, please correct my errors here,when a theory is proven is it still a theory or does it then become a fact ?).I am sure soon enough there will be theories on anything and everything !!..and then we'll discover that there's no point to anything because it's all so easily explained !!( uh oh...think I'm losing the plot here[:)])

I'm sure there are formulas which are accurate that can be used to signify love...but at the moment I just can't see how love can be categorized into a theory , especially regarding individuality....and there are so many different forms of love....good and bad.

Lets hope a passing 'love theoritician' passes by.

ANDREW !!...good on ya !!

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Offline memasa

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Re: Love
« Reply #5 on: 10/07/2005 17:00:13 »
One rather accurate formula is that the more homogamous the two people are the more likely they are to fall in love, or then they'll just end up hating each other. :)

Think about the amount of variables... ;)

Scents and all that...

I am bewildered by love! :))


"Nothing is certain but death and taxes."
Benjamin Franklin in 1789
« Last Edit: 10/07/2005 17:01:49 by memasa »
"Nothing is certain but death and taxes."
Benjamin Franklin in 1789

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Offline neilep

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Re: Love
« Reply #6 on: 10/07/2005 17:26:34 »
quote:
Originally posted by memasa



I am bewildered by love! :))






Me too !!...was it Shakespeare who said 'Love is a many splendored thing ?'...well, at least I know Ewan Mcgregor said it in Moulin Rouge !!...what a great subject....soooooooooo much more pleasant to talk about than Hate !!


Men are the same as women.... just inside out !!
Men are the same as women, just inside out !

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Offline VAlibrarian

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Re: Love
« Reply #7 on: 14/07/2005 01:54:23 »
I think it worth noting that there is love and there is infatuation. Many humans experience the glorious feeling of infatuation, especially when we are young. It is tied very closely to sexual desire. After we find out more about our partner and discover the things we share or do not share, it can either deepen into love or it can fall apart.
Infatuation to me is more of a chemical phenomenon than love is.

chris wiegard
chris wiegard

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Offline memasa

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Re: Love
« Reply #8 on: 15/07/2005 10:41:47 »
VAlibrarian: I agree infatuation is in part a chemical phenomenon, but I'm still waiting for that love doctor to pop in and expound it.
« Last Edit: 15/07/2005 10:42:10 by memasa »
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Offline neilep

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Re: Love
« Reply #9 on: 15/07/2005 11:39:14 »
Love..is an emotion...when the Love doctor does call by, he/she/it may as well answer the mechanics of love, hate,joy,sadness and all the other ones too....I just don't think the 'mechanics' of falling in love can be adequately explained......yet !........

I don't want to strongly disagree with Chris (VAlibrarian) but I'm not too sure if sexual desire is as close to infatuation as mentioned. There are people who are clearly infatutaed with with their idols, fans etc etc...I'm not too convinced that in the majority of these infatuations that in these cases these people crave a sexual desire with them......well, maybe that's not true !!..every girly I've ever fancied I've wanted to bonk !!...oh well....that's a waste of a posting isn't it ?...except that my infatuations were short lived phases of passion....oh Poo !!!.........Valibarian is right , I'm wrong !!..move on..no more to see here !!....

Men are the same as women.... just inside out !!
Men are the same as women, just inside out !

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Offline Andrew K Fletcher

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Re: Love
« Reply #10 on: 15/07/2005 13:15:25 »
Yesterday, Jude was hot! She had been cleaning the leather suite with hide food in insanely hot temperatures. She asked if I could throw a bucket of water over her to cool her down, jokingly of course, so I obliged her with the hosepipe on full blast and she was screaming but did not run off at first, later she said she was now cool and we both chuckled a lot as she stood dripping and smiling in her wet clothes. Now is that something you would do for anyone requesting a bucket of water to be thrown over them, and get away with it, or is it something that comes from an understanding of each others sense of humour.

One day, a long time ago, Jude was reading a newspaper. I called her to make her look up and shoved a huge fresh cream cake in her face. We laughed. A few months later when I had forgotten all about it, she got me back with an equally large and unexpected cream cake in the mush, it was great spontaneous fun, and we still laugh about our past antics together to this day.

Another time, we were walking the dogs with our friend Lynn through a large field with a hillside and fresh cow dung in it. Now Jude is scared of cattle and Lynn is not overjoyed by the thought of bullfighting in a field. There were no cows in the field, and I was way ahead of them both disappearing over a small hill out of sight.
Their faces as I came running passed them without saying a word and their screams as they promptly followed me at full pelt with horror on their faces and the fear of the unknown demons that were hot on their tales. When I stopped, they looked around to see an empty field and we all howled with laughter.

So having a sense of humour helps loads with any relationship, and we have laughed for hours at silly things that one would not find so hilarious in other situations.

Unless you have the same likeminded partner, I would only recommend the fresh cream cake in the face, as the other above-mentioned practical jokes, could cause you to end up on the couch for a night or two.


"The explanation requiring the fewest assumptions is most likely to be correct."
K.I.S. "Keep it simple!"
Science is continually evolving. Nothing is set in stone. Question everything and everyone. Always consider vested interests as a reason for miss-direction. But most of all explore and find answers that you are comfortable with

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Offline memasa

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Re: Love
« Reply #11 on: 15/07/2005 18:49:38 »
I just found a book about love. The author of the book is a German psychologist Bas Kast. The original name of the is book "Die Liebe und wie sich Leidenschaft erklärt". (It's translated in Finnish as "Rakkauden selitys" [Explanation of Love]).
If you translate the name literally, it goes like this: "Love, and How Passion Shows Itself". Unfortunately there is no English translation.
« Last Edit: 15/07/2005 18:56:49 by memasa »
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Offline neilep

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Re: Love
« Reply #12 on: 15/07/2005 18:56:52 »
Well there you go. The mechanics of love starts on page 1 until the last page.

Men are the same as women.... just inside out !!
Men are the same as women, just inside out !

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Offline memasa

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Re: Love
« Reply #13 on: 15/07/2005 18:59:04 »
Is it just me, or is that an ironic comment, Neilep? ;)
« Last Edit: 15/07/2005 18:59:32 by memasa »
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Offline neilep

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Re: Love
« Reply #14 on: 15/07/2005 22:33:13 »
quote:
Originally posted by memasa

Is it just me, or is that an ironic comment, Neilep? ;)



[:D][:D]just being a tad cheeky !![:D][;)]

Men are the same as women.... just inside out !!
Men are the same as women, just inside out !

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Offline memasa

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Re: Love
« Reply #15 on: 16/07/2005 09:43:02 »
quote:
Well there you go. The mechanics of love starts on page 1 until the last page.


And Kama Sutra is for the men and women of action. [:D]

"Take 777, Action!"
"Nothing is certain but death and taxes."
Benjamin Franklin in 1789

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Offline VAlibrarian

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Re: Love
« Reply #16 on: 17/07/2005 01:37:43 »
On further reflection there is a role of learned behavior in Love. Some of us never get to be much good at Love. Others do, partly because they have seen good examples. Human behavior is varied. We are less predictable than our Ape relatives, and I think the role of learning makes for that difference.
Compare Shakespeare's sonnet "Let the marriage of true minds admit no impediments" to the kind of abusive, dominating attitude towards women that we see in some human males. To realize the potential of Love to give joy, it is necesary to be able to give- and thereby to elicit a response that drives you to give more.

chris wiegard
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Offline l_kryptonite

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Re: Love
« Reply #17 on: 18/07/2005 06:54:58 »
For me?
Love, lust and infatuation; each is different, with its own unique signature...Get all three of them in the same room, (and preferably in the same body,) and I know I'm In Love.
The trick is getting them all to come to the same party[;)]
 

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Offline Ultima

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Re: Love
« Reply #18 on: 18/07/2005 20:20:22 »
And for the other person to feel the same! [:D]

wOw the world spins?
wOw the world spins?

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Offline memasa

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Re: Love
« Reply #19 on: 19/07/2005 14:01:26 »
quote:
[...]"Die Liebe und wie sich Leidenschaft erklärt."


I have read the book now and all I can say is that it's excellent, it's cheerful, it's entertaining, it's serious, it's scientific etc. etc.

Maybe I'll read it again and take notes which I'll then post here!

If there are any translators around I truly recommend working on this one. Especially if you're also interested in medicine, neurophysiology, psychology or biology.
« Last Edit: 19/07/2005 14:14:20 by memasa »
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Offline l_kryptonite

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Re: Love
« Reply #20 on: 20/07/2005 01:27:06 »
You forgot to mention the most important one.  Was it accurate?

Thanks Ultima, it does work much better when reciprocated.
 

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Offline memasa

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Re: Love
« Reply #21 on: 20/07/2005 15:32:54 »
It's as accurate as a scientific book about love can be. Science is based on observations and measurable things, even hypotheticals base on prior research results to some extent either to disprove or support/widen them.


"Nothing is certain but death and taxes."
Benjamin Franklin in 1789
« Last Edit: 20/07/2005 15:39:07 by memasa »
"Nothing is certain but death and taxes."
Benjamin Franklin in 1789

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Offline memasa

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Re: Love
« Reply #22 on: 03/09/2005 19:20:38 »
You should also listen the Science of Sex radio show:

http://www.thenakedscientists.com/html/shows/2005.02.13.htm
« Last Edit: 03/09/2005 21:07:09 by memasa »
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Benjamin Franklin in 1789

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Offline antelope

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Re: Love
« Reply #23 on: 03/09/2005 23:03:50 »
I like some people sometimes. Is that to do with whether or not they agree with me? I hope not and I don;t think so. Being scientific in one's approach to life does not mean that the same approach is appropriate to those vague entities, people. It doesn't mean you have to disregard the intuitive. In fact the best scientific [and religious and philosphical insights] have come about in moments of mental absence. Stop thinking and try to be more aware of that part of you that is aware that you're thinking. Science doesn't have a name for this yet. Doesn't science point to multiple universes? Multiple ways of being?
 

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Offline moonfire

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Re: Love
« Reply #24 on: 19/06/2006 19:41:02 »
Andrew, you and your wife are my type of people!!!  You are awesome!!!

"Lo" Loretta
"Just Me, Lo" Loretta

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Offline Karen W.

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Re: Love
« Reply #25 on: 24/06/2006 08:00:53 »
This is a wonderful thread. Do go on! I want in too!
« Last Edit: 19/11/2006 18:45:52 by Karen W. »

"Life is not measured by the number of Breaths we take, but by the moments that take our breath away."

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Offline moonfire

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Re: Love
« Reply #26 on: 24/06/2006 12:44:04 »
I can concur with that statement as well from Karen!

"Lo" Loretta
"Just Me, Lo" Loretta

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Offline tootsie78

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Re: Love
« Reply #27 on: 24/06/2006 16:42:06 »
Wow Andrew!  You have truly shown us what love is!  You sound like you've got a marriage that everyone would envy!  Keep it up!

Joy
~Joy~

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Offline neilep

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Re: Love
« Reply #28 on: 24/06/2006 19:10:16 »
Hey you girls...I'm romantic and have fluffy interactions with my bi...err..wifey too !!

Yesterday...Julia was having a nice soothing relaxing soak in the bath...she had soothing music and essential oils that really made the bathroom all nice and atmospheric...this , with small floating candles really helped to send her into a calming place of tranquility and harmony....

...so...because we know each other so well...I (hee hee) filled a bucket with ice cold water and crushed ice and mud and dirt and worms and piranhas..... I approached her with a romatic look in my eye and offered to massage her back for her....

...Oh how I laughed my head off when she quite literally jumped out of the bath....of course..I had oiled the floor too and it was hilarious to see her feet do twenty to the dozen as she tried to stand up.....then to steady herself she tried to reach for a shelf...but I had secretly loosened the screws and we all fell about in hysterics as the shelves fell on her and that the second bucket (that I had placed up there) filled with cockroaches and an octopus fell straight onto her head.....

..It makes for a wonderful video I can tell you for which i have ciculated amongst her bestest friends and their husbands etc...

....anyway....from her hospital bed I can tell she can see the funny side of it....now that is Love ! [:D]

Men are the same as women, just inside out !
Men are the same as women, just inside out !

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Offline tootsie78

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Re: Love
« Reply #29 on: 24/06/2006 20:59:07 »
HEE HEE HEE HEE!  Sorry, don't much believe that story Neil!  [;)]

Joy
~Joy~

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Offline neilep

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Re: Love
« Reply #30 on: 24/06/2006 21:30:01 »
quote:
Originally posted by tootsie78

HEE HEE HEE HEE!  Sorry, don't much believe that story Neil!  [;)]

Joy




It's TRUE !!![:D][:D][;)][;)]

Note from Neil's wife.

Dear Joy,

(OUCH !!....oh my poor broken body)

It's Julia here..Neil's wife ...OUCH...!!!..Neil is such a lovely romantic that I am so lucky....OUCH !!..to have him !! I am blessed.
Wish I could say more (OUCH !!..oohhhh..the pain!!)...but I am restricted to only 15 minutes of movement a day because of the traction I'm in !!...OOOOOUUCCHH !!



So, there you have it Joy...straight from the horses mouth !![:D][:D][:D]

Men are the same as women, just inside out !
Men are the same as women, just inside out !

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Offline ukmicky

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Re: Love
« Reply #31 on: 24/06/2006 23:13:59 »
I believe you Neil.

Michael

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Offline neilep

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Re: Love
« Reply #32 on: 24/06/2006 23:45:18 »
THANK YOU MICHAEL,

Here also,is a man who knows how to woo and charm a woman....I myself have learnt from him...

Thank You again Michael.

Men are the same as women, just inside out !
Men are the same as women, just inside out !

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Offline Karen W.

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Re: Love
« Reply #33 on: 25/06/2006 00:26:52 »
Neil, You crack me up!  I guess thats why I luv you so much! You should write That for a Jack Black screenplay role! Sounds like its right out of a bad comedy! Although it sounds like the rolling around part on the floor was your intention all along Sir! Mission accomplished! HEHEHE!

"Life is not measured by the number of Breaths we take, but by the moments that take our breath away."

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Offline moonfire

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Re: Love
« Reply #34 on: 25/06/2006 04:24:39 »
Neil, you are wild!  Love your wild side though..hehe I agree with Karen, you should write this for a Jack Black screenplay role..hehe...If you had really did that...we would've known Julia would have royally crowned you and I don't mean king'ing you either!

"Lo" Loretta
"Just Me, Lo" Loretta

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Offline neilep

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Re: Love
« Reply #35 on: 25/06/2006 04:58:02 »
*blushing*

Thanks Karen, Thanks Lo,

Just pleased to make you smile........

Men are the same as women, just inside out !
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Offline Karen W.

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Re: Love
« Reply #36 on: 25/06/2006 06:13:22 »
Ok, Here is Romantic! We were married on July 18th 1981 and for my Birthday on Aug. 30th,My husband Rob takes me to San Francisco for my 1rst visit as an adult. I am from a small town, so the city was very exciting and a bit scarey, I wanted to see everything from the Golden gate Bridge, Wax Museum to Gheradehli Square,(pardon my spelling)So we walk around and he says, you have to ride a cable car, so it stops and we jump on. We are going up and down these hills and past all these vender all along the road. We are on this real steep hhill and I am holding on to pole standing as ther was no sitting down. Right in the middle of the cable car zooming down the hill My husband Jumps off the cable car and starts running back up the hill, leaving me speechless and confused and crusing alone among about 50 strangers.  I start to panic. Where is he going? Then I see him disappear behind a vendor up the road, the next thing I know he is running full out down the hill trying to catch the cable car. When he finally caught up he handed me a single red rose with babies breath and a red satin ribbon. Then he kissed me and told me he loved me! My heart almost stopped. I knew he was mine and I would always be his. To this day, he always gives me a single red rose every christmas eve with a special christmas ornament attached to the Ribbon. We have been Married 25 years on the 18th of next month and We have had small, and big problems and have weathered the storms, but marraige and love is not always easy,and its not always the right kind of love. there are many types of love felt in many marraiges, That doesn't mean loving someone garantees True love. We have a different kind of Love. I have always loved him and I know he loves me, even though that was the most romantic thing he has ever done, sometimes his lack of romance is strangely romantic. So basicly he is romantic once a year! I am the romantic at heart all year round.
« Last Edit: 20/08/2006 05:37:09 by Karen W. »

"Life is not measured by the number of Breaths we take, but by the moments that take our breath away."

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Offline moonfire

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Re: Love
« Reply #37 on: 25/06/2006 10:08:28 »
Awww, Karen, he is a keeper...how sweet!  I hope I will have the rest of my life with Denny and have similar stories as you guys have shared here...He always writes poetry to me...and has been a bit slow doing it lately as he has worked quite a bit...you might say I am a bit spoiled...but nevertheless I enjoy reading them over and over.

"Lo" Loretta
"Just Me, Lo" Loretta

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Offline tootsie78

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Re: Love
« Reply #38 on: 26/06/2006 03:54:08 »
Dear Diary,

I wonder how long Lo & Denny have been together???  Jason & I have been together 11 1/2 years.  I must say, I am spoiled, spoiled, spoiled.  He treats me toooooo good!  He loves me unconditionally...what a sweetie!  He's not "Mr. Romantic", but that's not what matters...unconditional love is what matters!  Loving me for who I am, not what he "wants" me to be is what's important to me!!!  Oh!  Love is soooooo great!!!

Joy
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Offline Karen W.

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Re: Love
« Reply #39 on: 27/06/2006 07:12:08 »
Joy that is so sweet and it is true to a point. I love the way you feel. Is love unconditional or forgiving? I am not sure. If my husband become a mass murder, I don't think my love would be unconditional. There are just some things I could never be ok with, although I love him, the way he is, things have happened that changed the the way I love him. That doesn't mean I accept everything he could ever do or be. I really don't know how I feel about that word. There would always be love that had been there to start, but as to weather It would always stay the same, I don't think so. Our love has grown in many different directions, as well as become different then when we were actually falling in love. Love takes on many different faces in the course of twenty five years and I suspect that it will change many more times! With each face of love marraige changes not always for the better! It can remain a marraige, and yet lack the right kind of feelings to maintain happiness! Thus becoming bumpy, and hard to manage to say the least. I wonder if other married couples out their find that they feel that same animal magnetism that they first felt with their spouses as they were falling in love. It is so different then a love evolved from that crazy lusty hot love you feel when younger, although sexually that may still be there for some. It is the other aspects that evolve and change over the years That might make love stronger or more or less secure and stable, or maybe even fail! Love should be glorious and there are many different kinds of love!It is different for all.
   

  Congratulations on your 11 and 1/2 years. You are doing well.
« Last Edit: 20/08/2006 05:52:03 by Karen W. »

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Re: Love
« Reply #40 on: 27/06/2006 07:51:50 »
Quote
Originally posted by tootsie78

Dear Diary,

I wonder how long Lo & Denny have been together???  Jason & I have been together 11 1/2 years.  I must say, I am spoiled, spoiled, spoiled.  He treats me toooooo good!  He loves me unconditionally...what a sweetie!  He's not "Mr. Romantic", but that's not what matters...unconditional love is what matters!  Loving me for who I am, not what he "wants" me to be is what's important to me!!!  Oh!  Love is soooooo great!!!

Joy

Joy, I am glad you have a husband who spoils you! I have known Denny for 21/2yrs...I disliked him for about 4 months with his constant pestering me and his persistence...and liked him about 2yrs and 2months and loved him for about 2yrs...we have not "been together", but are together..lol  He spoils me too...but we come to battle at times with our strong wills...sometimes he lets me win and sometimes I let him win(or let him think he has won...hehe)[:D]  He states he is nervous proposing to me this time as I have always turned him down from the poetry proposal to face to face proposals many times...I have had cold feet from the thought of marriage as I was married before....He states he is nervous to ask me again as I have not accepted so many times...[:0]I have not dealt with committment well after divorce and even my sons are not believing it...they love Denny and call him their dad...and his son Jason thinks of me as his "mum"  but still it gives me a bit of nausea as I think this is it!  We have agreed there is no word "D------" to be spoken once we get married...so independence is a bit lessened with a helpmate...I have mentally thought this through and of course prayed and he as well...so it will be up to him to get his courage back with God's strength to ask once again...he doesn't know I am going to say yes, yet...

"Lo" Loretta
"Just Me, Lo" Loretta

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Offline neilep

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Re: Love
« Reply #41 on: 27/06/2006 15:29:52 »
Ahh LO...that's sooooooooooo great that you're going to say YES...and that we are all invited too !!

You will let us know when the proposal and acceptance is done won't you ?

YAYYYYYYYY !!!

Men are the same as women, just inside out !
Men are the same as women, just inside out !

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Offline moonfire

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Re: Love
« Reply #42 on: 28/06/2006 02:29:16 »
Yes, Neil...I have given up...the white flag is waving...I love that man!  LOL  I had to stir him up a bit today and ask if he really loved me...he about fell out...lol  He said, what?  I can't believe you said that!  hehe...okay, of course I was trying to get a rise out him!  I enjoy his reactions...it is too much fun to watch face to face or hear his response on the phone...hehe  Yes, you all are invited..but you must let me know as this is an RSVP!  I will have anyone who comes from the forum as special guests of mine behind family row...lol  I will let you know the exact date too..tell me where to post it!  hehe  I do know 2 members are coming!

"Lo" Loretta
"Just Me, Lo" Loretta

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Offline Karen W.

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Re: Love
« Reply #43 on: 28/06/2006 04:32:08 »
I am so happy for you and wish you the best Loretta. He will be a lucky man!
  (LOVE...IS A MANY SPLENDID THING.......WHEN TWO LOVERS MEET IN A CROWDED STREET AND THEIR HEARTS STAND STILL.......) OH I LOVE THIS FORUM.

"Life is not measured by the number of Breaths we take, but by the moments that take our breath away."

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Re: Love
« Reply #44 on: 28/06/2006 05:09:39 »
Thanks Karen you and Neilsy are the best!  LOL  Yes, he is a lucky man...hehe...oh boy, bless his heart...he has a lot of patience with me!  Trust me, when we travel abroad, he and I will have global cells...so that way, when I go "shopping" okay, an adventure..hehe we will be able to reach each other instead of renting cells..hehe I will try to behave...must I? I love this forum too and learning alot about you married people...so much to learn as I had married at a younger age...

"Lo" Loretta
"Just Me, Lo" Loretta

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Offline neilep

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Re: Love
« Reply #45 on: 28/06/2006 13:53:30 »
Hee Hee !!...you're going to need engagement ring, wedding rings, bridesmaid rings...rings rings rings rings rings!!!....hmmmmm !!..if only you knew of a good jeweller !! [;)][:D][:D][;)]

Men are the same as women, just inside out !
Men are the same as women, just inside out !

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Offline tootsie78

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Re: Love
« Reply #46 on: 28/06/2006 21:20:07 »
HELLO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!  LORETTA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!  I married young!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

*Joy*
~Joy~

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Offline Karen W.

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Re: Love
« Reply #47 on: 29/06/2006 03:53:02 »
Better get busy you  have your work cut out for you!
Joy How young were you girl? I married my husband when I was 21 years old. He was my first kiss first hug first sweetheart if you know what I mean! I have never been involved with any other man. He swept me off my feet. He was so cute. He come to take me out for our first date alone and we were to go bowling. I changed out of my work clothes to go. When he arrived, he was on his motorcycle with a extra helmet! He took one look at me and said, I will be right back. He went and borrowed his dads truck. We had a great time except that I was so excited, I bowled a 299, the first game. He bowled a 69! I was embarrassed and felt like he was embarrassed. I remember I wanted to touch his arm but was so nervous I could not, so I slugged him instead! Then he smiled and said lets go again. The next game I bowled all gutters, he still bowled around the same score, so we went for 3 out of three.  I won with a 164. I was taught to bowl by a professional bowler, but I cannot say what happened the 2nd game as I have never bowled all gutters before! HEHEHE! !rst game was a fluke, I haven't bowled that high since. I am about 164 average when I have been practicing. My shoulder disables me from bowling much these days although I do love to do it!  

  
 Ok Joy How old were you?
« Last Edit: 19/11/2006 18:55:18 by Karen W. »

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Offline neilep

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Re: Love
« Reply #48 on: 29/06/2006 04:08:20 »
Karen.......WOW !!...you are amazing at recalling and then telling with eloquence your wonderful memories. You are very articulate.....and hubby is a super bloke....and ...he's lucky too.

Thanks for a great luvvy duvvy post....

Men are the same as women, just inside out !
Men are the same as women, just inside out !

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Offline tootsie78

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Re: Love
« Reply #49 on: 29/06/2006 05:03:07 »
Sorry, I have NOOO idea why that posted 3 times!  SORRY EVERYBODY!

*Joy*
~Joy~