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A cannibal chief invited over another cannibal chief from a different tribe over for dinner. They sit down and eat the best meat. After dinner, the visiting cannibal chief said, "Wow that was good! Your wife makes the best meat." Then the other cannibal chief said, "Yeah, I'm gonna miss her..."   
Santa came home from a secret two year mission only to find his wife, Jeeto, with a new born baby. Furious, he was determined to track down the father to extract revenge. "Was it my friend Banta", he demanded. "No !" his weeping wife replied. "Was it my friend Ramta then?" he asked. "No !!!" she said even more upset. "Well which one of my no good friends did this then?" he asked. "Don't you think I have any friends of my own?" Jeeto snapped 
"Front left", Miss.oh, sorry, did you want us to write that down?
my wife could tell me where to park it, if I had a wife.
I am a millionaire, just in Zimbabwe dollars. I gave away $ 10 million, and still was worth the same, although it is really hard to get more Zimdollars, as the Zim government has given in and started to use US dollars and SA Rands as the OFFICIAL currency. Cheaper than printing your own notes, as the paper was worth considerably more than the notes, even for the $100 trillion notes. A bad thing when noone robs banks, as the money weighs too much, plus you will need a truck and trailer to move it. You saw street peddlers with the money piled in bundles next to them, they guarded the goods as they were worth more. Rather like the Weimar republic, where you went with the money in a wheelbarrow, and came home with the groceries in your pocket.
Omid, have a google for Weimar republic and Hyperinflation, you will become enlightened. As well afraid, horrified and thankful, all at the same time.
At a fancy reception Peppercorn was asked by a widow to guess her age. "You must have some idea," she urged as Peppercorn hesitated. "I have several ideas," he admitted with a smile, "the trouble is that I don't know whether to make it ten years younger because of your looks or ten years older because of your intelligence."