Punning is hard(ly) work! Is groaning aloud here?

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Offline demografx

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Re: Punning is hard(ly) work! Groaning aloud here?
« Reply #2400 on: 22/07/2012 04:30:40 »
I have decided to confffesss (excuse the stuttttter) to my age.
View my profile, if you are really that hard up for something to do.

Don_1 profile
Posts: 5,650,307 (see Guiness World Records)
Email: questionable@credentials.c om
Gender: Male (non-virgin)
Age:346
Location:Lunatic Asylum
Attitude: Yes

Methuselah, I find your Rip van Winkle description...modest.
« Last Edit: 22/07/2012 05:25:46 by demografx »

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Offline demografx

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Re: Punning is hard(ly) work! Groaning aloud here?
« Reply #2401 on: 22/07/2012 06:32:41 »
But perfect (A+) for this thread!

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Re: Punning is hard(ly) work! Groaning aloud here?
« Reply #2402 on: 22/07/2012 10:32:43 »
I thought this was a brilliant idea, so asked 'er indoors to assist me in a lobotomy.

Alas, she did not quite understand what a lobotomy means and proceeded to chop my bum off.

Shitting will never be the same again.

Problem shifting? Just get an automatic like I did!

An automatic bum??? Good gracious, whatever next? Automatic gear boxes in cars, I suppose.
If brains were made of dynamite, I wouldn't have enough to blow my nose.

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Re: Punning is hard(ly) work! Groaning aloud here?
« Reply #2403 on: 22/07/2012 10:36:01 »
Demo, have you considered that we may be like two old farts in a pair of incontinence pants?!
If brains were made of dynamite, I wouldn't have enough to blow my nose.

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Offline Don_1

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Re: Punning is hard(ly) work! Groaning aloud here?
« Reply #2404 on: 22/07/2012 10:58:03 »
By jove, I'm getting my chelonians out all over the place here recently.

Who will be first to say 'put a shell sock in it.'
If brains were made of dynamite, I wouldn't have enough to blow my nose.

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Offline demografx

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Re: Punning is hard(ly) work! Groaning aloud here?
« Reply #2405 on: 22/07/2012 20:20:29 »
Demo, have you considered that we may be like two old farts in a pair of incontinence pants?!

Now that you put it that way, Don_1, it's downright...flatulence flattering!
« Last Edit: 23/07/2012 05:41:17 by demografx »

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Offline demografx

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Re: Punning is hard(ly) work! Groaning aloud here?
« Reply #2406 on: 22/07/2012 23:35:20 »
By jove, I'm getting my chelonians out all over the place here recently.

Who will be first to say 'put a shell sock in it.'


The shell of turtles is the backbone of their success!

But it's the weekend so maybe I'll hit the tavern and get plastred on Michelonian Lite (beer).

« Last Edit: 23/07/2012 05:44:47 by demografx »

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Offline demografx

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Re: Punning is hard(ly) work! Groaning aloud here?
« Reply #2407 on: 23/07/2012 00:36:04 »
I know some of this is repetitive, but how the hell else are we gonna make it to page 100?????

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Offline demografx

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Re: Punning is hard(ly) work! Groaning aloud here?
« Reply #2408 on: 23/07/2012 03:54:09 »
'Tis with great thanks that I reply to you, oh wonderous one.

Armed with this information, I'm sure I will be able to finger any terrorwrist now. I'm sure hel bow to my soupearior nolij and not try to palm me off with any humerous stories.

I shall metataskforce and raid 'is 'ouse. I'm sure I can now shoulder this burden with a little trainning from the Special Boat Service men in Scapula Flow.



Don_1 handily wins The Chair for his great, great activities in detecting terrorwrists!
« Last Edit: 23/07/2012 21:51:33 by demografx »

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Offline demografx

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Re: Punning is hard(ly) work! Groaning aloud here?
« Reply #2409 on: 23/07/2012 05:56:41 »


A Michelonianangelo_saulus jpeg on the Internet.
« Last Edit: 23/07/2012 06:08:50 by demografx »

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Offline bizerl

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Re: Punning is hard(ly) work! Groaning aloud here?
« Reply #2410 on: 23/07/2012 07:06:27 »
so this is how you neilp level members get so many posts! A mundane way to spend time on a science forum - there must be better! As a nubi, I surely can't hope to compete with other members, or SOS! I risk the wrath of the gods!

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Re: Punning is hard(ly) work! Groaning aloud here?
« Reply #2411 on: 23/07/2012 10:26:01 »
Ah ha! A new subscriber to the punning thread!

We are hapi to have you along for the ride, but please don’t ptah us all with the same brush. We may be seth in our ways and a little long in the thoth, maybe even a little nuts and there are nun so foolish as an old fool, however, but fhor us, the forum might geb a tad tedious.  With so much talk of what is nu in science, such as the particles to be found in an atum, well, at enough to drive you bonkers. It is always best to introduce a little levity here and there.

Huh!” You may say,” you memn on this forum remind me of village idiots, anile  nefer titi around with you.”

Well, phar aohnough, but we shall continue to burn effigies of science and all else here on the pyr amid the sanity. Anat is just the way it is.

So take off your hat, hor sit on the ma’at, stroke our dog, he’s a fine looking mut, or nep it in the bud and revert to good sense.

Whether by lux or destiny, you have stumbled in to this madhouse and whether you ment uho tep the balance or not, you did Toot an khamun in to join us. It doesn’t take alot to amuse us, so Ptolemy, Demo and Donnah a few more puns and let yourself go.
If brains were made of dynamite, I wouldn't have enough to blow my nose.

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Offline demografx

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Re: Punning is hard(ly) work! Groaning aloud here?
« Reply #2412 on: 23/07/2012 21:48:27 »
Welcome, bizerl! May Thor protect you from our collective madness!

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Offline demografx

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Re: Punning is hard(ly) work! Groaning aloud here?
« Reply #2413 on: 23/07/2012 22:28:37 »

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Re: Punning is hard(ly) work! Groaning aloud here?
« Reply #2414 on: 24/07/2012 01:30:08 »
Good grief, Demo, there we were in Egypt and you have zeused your power to transport us to northern Europe. I thort you might do that.

BTW, I'm not sure any gods can protect anyone from the inmates of this looney bin.
If brains were made of dynamite, I wouldn't have enough to blow my nose.

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Offline bizerl

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Re: Punning is hard(ly) work! Groaning aloud here?
« Reply #2415 on: 24/07/2012 02:04:16 »
I can hardly compete with the marvel that is demographic. Novel as it is, it would take six men to weather the storm, and while i'd find going AWOL veri necessary at times, the magnet of scientific discovery gives me resolve stronger than iron! Man was not born to crawl like the spider! Man was made to wonder! Woman too.

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Offline demografx

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Re: Punning is hard(ly) work! Groaning aloud here?
« Reply #2416 on: 24/07/2012 02:51:50 »

I'm not sure any gods can protect anyone from the inmates of this looney bin.


Don_1, there are rumors that we inmates of this looney bin all fell into poison ivy and started a rash of breakouts.
« Last Edit: 24/07/2012 07:36:29 by demografx »

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Offline demografx

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Re: Punning is hard(ly) work! Groaning aloud here?
« Reply #2417 on: 24/07/2012 03:35:18 »

...resolve stronger than iron! Man was not born to crawl like the spider! Man was made to wonder! Woman too.


I protest! You left out Batman!

« Last Edit: 24/07/2012 03:40:24 by demografx »

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Re: Punning is hard(ly) work! Groaning aloud here?
« Reply #2418 on: 24/07/2012 04:03:17 »


Training Clip For *Odyn!

*proud human owner: Donnah
« Last Edit: 24/07/2012 04:10:03 by demografx »

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Offline bizerl

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Re: Punning is hard(ly) work! Groaning aloud here?
« Reply #2419 on: 24/07/2012 04:03:35 »
I already felt funny about including Wonder Woman in a Marvel dominated post - I thought that would be controversial enough. I also thought that the friendly combat managed to create a throb inside my head!

I should be a cryptic crossword writer!  ;)

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Offline demografx

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Re: Punning is hard(ly) work! Groaning aloud here?
« Reply #2420 on: 24/07/2012 04:15:14 »
True, bizerl, and the friendly combat even helped our mobile phone reception!
« Last Edit: 24/07/2012 04:46:27 by demografx »

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Offline demografx

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Re: Punning is hard(ly) work! Groaning aloud here?
« Reply #2421 on: 24/07/2012 04:49:42 »

I should be a cryptic crossword writer!  ;)


« Last Edit: 24/07/2012 04:54:25 by demografx »

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Re: Punning is hard(ly) work! Groaning aloud here?
« Reply #2422 on: 24/07/2012 12:52:03 »
I can hardly compete with the marvel that is demographic. Novel as it is, it would take six men to weather the storm, and while i'd find going AWOL veri necessary at times, the magnet of scientific discovery gives me resolve stronger than iron! Man was not born to crawl like the spider! Man was made to wonder! Woman too.

Well strike me down, what the dickens was all that? You were tolkien about more comic characters than you can shake a speare at there. I think youve rned youself an award for 'best newcomer' there. Demo will doubtless sort one out for you. Shell ey make it a bronze or gold, ing fact, it would not go amis, I'm sure. It wont cost much since he asimof the shelf rather than made to order. He doesn't like to be too austintacious. It may be in the shape of a brontesaurus or T.rex (de foe of afore said dinosaur).

I am sure you will rejoyce at whatever is forthcoming, but please, no larkin about and don't revert to writting trollope afterwards.

Schulz you be unhappy with your award, much to our horo, witz we will display, we will hold you until a ransome is paid to calm our roth, but I warn you, atwood take a great deal of monet***.

***How did he get in here?
If brains were made of dynamite, I wouldn't have enough to blow my nose.

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Re: Punning is hard(ly) work! Groaning aloud here?
« Reply #2423 on: 24/07/2012 13:05:31 »

I'm not sure any gods can protect anyone from the inmates of this looney bin.


Don_1, there are rumors that we inmates of this looney bin all fell into poison ivy and started a rash of breakouts.


I went to a French restaurant called 'Le Mariner', where they asked if I wanted poissin. 'How strange', I thought. I declined the offer and said I would have fish instead.
« Last Edit: 24/07/2012 13:09:48 by Don_1 »
If brains were made of dynamite, I wouldn't have enough to blow my nose.

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Re: Punning is hard(ly) work! Groaning aloud here?
« Reply #2424 on: 24/07/2012 13:08:03 »

I should be a cryptic crossword writer!  ;)




Do I detect some skulduggery going on here?
If brains were made of dynamite, I wouldn't have enough to blow my nose.

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Offline demografx

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Re: Punning is hard(ly) work! Groaning aloud here?
« Reply #2425 on: 24/07/2012 20:13:33 »

Don_1, there are rumors that we inmates of this looney bin all fell into poison ivy and started a rash of breakouts.


I went to a French restaurant called 'Le Mariner', where they asked if I wanted poissin. 'How strange', I thought. I declined the offer and said I would have fish instead.




Don_1, I hope you first removed the scuba gear before dining!!
« Last Edit: 24/07/2012 20:19:55 by demografx »

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Offline demografx

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Re: Punning is hard(ly) work! Groaning aloud here?
« Reply #2426 on: 24/07/2012 20:36:29 »

[bizerl], I think you've earned youself an award for 'best newcomer' there. Demo will doubtless sort one out for you.




Will this one do, Don_1?



« Last Edit: 24/07/2012 20:42:58 by demografx »

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Re: Punning is hard(ly) work! Groaning aloud here?
« Reply #2427 on: 24/07/2012 23:30:41 »

I should be a cryptic crossword writer!  ;)




Do I detect some skulduggery going on here?

Haha, no, I actually dig it!

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Re: Punning is hard(ly) work! Groaning aloud here?
« Reply #2428 on: 25/07/2012 10:48:03 »



Will this one do, Don_1?


I thought this might be a more admirable selection, but I bow to your experience.

A pictorial pun.
« Last Edit: 25/07/2012 10:50:56 by Don_1 »
If brains were made of dynamite, I wouldn't have enough to blow my nose.

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Offline demografx

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Re: Punning is hard(ly) work! Groaning aloud here?
« Reply #2429 on: 25/07/2012 21:29:20 »
I hereby Knight You, Don_1, King of Punning Graphics.

Alas, how can I award this award with my "Junior Graphics" now updated status????

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Re: Punning is hard(ly) work! Groaning aloud here?
« Reply #2430 on: 25/07/2012 21:40:30 »


I hereby award this BEST NEWCOMER Award to bizerl!!!

This message has been approved by Citizens To Free Don_1, Ltd.
« Last Edit: 25/07/2012 23:00:06 by demografx »

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Re: Punning is hard(ly) work! Groaning aloud here?
« Reply #2431 on: 25/07/2012 23:03:40 »


Fireworks is part A of mandatory newcomer hazing ritual...part B is the Punning Chamber, which {{{shudder}}} is <censored> .
« Last Edit: 25/07/2012 23:17:00 by demografx »

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Re: Punning is hard(ly) work! Groaning aloud here?
« Reply #2432 on: 26/07/2012 00:49:22 »
Oooooo! I love fireworks.


                                                                                                                                                                  h!!!!
                                                                                                                                                           h
                                                                                                                                                     h
                                                                                                                                             g                                                                                                                                                                                                   G
Now what does it say here.... light blue touchpaper and..... No its no good I can't read i AG

If brains were made of dynamite, I wouldn't have enough to blow my nose.

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Offline bizerl

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Re: Punning is hard(ly) work! Groaning aloud here?
« Reply #2433 on: 26/07/2012 01:18:39 »
All this fuss for li’l’ ol’ me? I feel like a cad. “Amy awards clever thinking but Oscar doesn’t care”, my Grammy used to say that but she was baft as a brush (sorry, typo). No, believe me when I say that silence is golden, globeally as well as locally (my spelling IS off today!). Whether an emmynent scientist or student who doesn’t give a fig, noble thoughts can ensue.

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Offline bizerl

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Re: Punning is hard(ly) work! Groaning aloud here?
« Reply #2434 on: 26/07/2012 01:19:50 »
Also, if I lose my job due to low productivity, I'm blaming you!  :P

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Re: Punning is hard(ly) work! Groaning aloud here?
« Reply #2435 on: 26/07/2012 02:32:19 »
We are PROUD of our low productivity here.

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Re: Punning is hard(ly) work! Groaning aloud here?
« Reply #2436 on: 26/07/2012 02:39:32 »

All this fuss for li’l’ ol’ me? I feel like a cad. “Amy awards clever thinking but Oscar doesn’t care”, my Grammy used to say that but she was baft as a brush (sorry, typo). No, believe me when I say that silence is golden, globeally as well as locally (my spelling IS off today!). Whether an emmynent scientist or student who doesn’t give a fig, noble thoughts can ensue.


Don_1 and I regret that you didn't win the highly coveted newcomer Galaxy Award, but you did receive a constellation prize.
« Last Edit: 26/07/2012 03:15:15 by demografx »

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Offline Donnah

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Re: Punning is hard(ly) work! Groaning aloud here?
« Reply #2437 on: 26/07/2012 03:22:22 »
Which makes you the star bizerl!!!
"Remember, if you ever need a helping hand, you will find one at the end of each of your arms." - Audrey Hepburn

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Offline demografx

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Re: Punning is hard(ly) work! Groaning aloud here?
« Reply #2438 on: 26/07/2012 03:32:46 »
Yes, Donnah ALWAYS speaks the sparkling truth, bizerl.

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Offline bizerl

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Re: Punning is hard(ly) work! Groaning aloud here?
« Reply #2439 on: 26/07/2012 03:51:01 »
What a stellar thought! It's got me pulsaring with excitement. I usually try to stay neutronal on such matters but your radiated praise has singularityly made me go red, dwarfed by such TNS forum royalty.

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Offline demografx

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Re: Punning is hard(ly) work! Groaning aloud here?
« Reply #2440 on: 26/07/2012 03:52:43 »
Prepare now! Starts tomorrow!
July 27 through July 29, 2012
Garlic Days:
http://www.gilroygarlicfestival.com/

That stinks!: we have to wait one whole day more for the festivities to begin! (see above link).


« Last Edit: 26/07/2012 04:02:15 by demografx »

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Re: Punning is hard(ly) work! Groaning aloud here?
« Reply #2441 on: 26/07/2012 04:25:16 »
 And don't forget to join in at the...

« Last Edit: 26/07/2012 04:26:48 by demografx »

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Re: Punning is hard(ly) work! Groaning aloud here?
« Reply #2442 on: 26/07/2012 05:38:19 »

...dwarfed by such TNS forum royalty.


Flattery will get you nowhere everywhere!

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Re: Punning is hard(ly) work! Groaning aloud here?
« Reply #2443 on: 26/07/2012 11:01:47 »
Prepare now! Starts tomorrow!
July 27 through July 29, 2012
Garlic Days:
http://www.gilroygarlicfestival.com/

That stinks!: we have to wait one whole day more for the festivities to begin! (see above link).




I would love to go to this to get some good pictures. I would set the camera to manual, with the aperture open wide and the shutter set to bulb I would use my macro lens to get some good clovesups.

To keep warm, I would set light to a small commercial vehicle and pitch camp next to this van pyre.
If brains were made of dynamite, I wouldn't have enough to blow my nose.

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Offline Donnah

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Re: Punning is hard(ly) work! Groaning aloud here?
« Reply #2444 on: 26/07/2012 22:59:45 »
What a stellar thought! It's got me pulsaring with excitement. I usually try to stay neutronal on such matters but your radiated praise has singularityly made me go red, dwarfed by such TNS forum royalty.
It's traditional for you to be mooned now (I know, it's a bummer).
"Remember, if you ever need a helping hand, you will find one at the end of each of your arms." - Audrey Hepburn

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Offline demografx

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Re: Punning is hard(ly) work! Groaning aloud here?
« Reply #2445 on: 27/07/2012 02:47:24 »
Prepare now! Starts tomorrow!
July 27 through July 29, 2012
Garlic Days:
http://www.gilroygarlicfestival.com/

That stinks!: we have to wait one whole day more for the festivities to begin! (see above link).




I would love to go to this to get some good pictures. I would set the camera to manual, with the aperture open wide and the shutter set to bulb I would use my macro lens to get some good clovesups.

To keep warm, I would set light to a small commercial vehicle and pitch camp next to this van pyre.



Garlic is stinky, but Don_1's punning performances are not!

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Offline Don_1

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Re: Punning is hard(ly) work! Groaning aloud here?
« Reply #2446 on: 27/07/2012 10:44:22 »
What a stellar thought! It's got me pulsaring with excitement. I usually try to stay neutronal on such matters but your radiated praise has singularityly made me go red, dwarfed by such TNS forum royalty.

It's traditional for you to be mooned now (I know, it's a bummer).


Is this one ok, Donnah?




Oh I say!!!

She can moon me any day of week.

Mind you, its a shame the poor lass can't afford a pair of knickers. She'll likely get a chill in her gluteus maximus. I shall offer to keep it warm for her.

Now what have I done wrong? I made sure my hands were warm first!
If brains were made of dynamite, I wouldn't have enough to blow my nose.

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Offline Don_1

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Re: Punning is hard(ly) work! Groaning aloud here?
« Reply #2447 on: 27/07/2012 10:48:10 »
......... it's a bummer.

Getting asteroids can be a pain in uranus.
If brains were made of dynamite, I wouldn't have enough to blow my nose.

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Offline demografx

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Re: Punning is hard(ly) work! Groaning aloud here?
« Reply #2448 on: 28/07/2012 01:13:22 »
What a stellar thought! It's got me pulsaring with excitement. I usually try to stay neutronal on such matters but your radiated praise has singularityly made me go red, dwarfed by such TNS forum royalty.

It's traditional for you to be mooned now (I know, it's a bummer).


Is this one ok, Donnah?




Oh I say!!!

She can moon me any day of week.

Mind you, its a shame the poor lass can't afford a pair of knickers. She'll likely get a chill in her gluteus maximus. I shall offer to keep it warm for her.

Now what have I done wrong? I made sure my hands were warm first!

Mooning is lunacy.

« Last Edit: 28/07/2012 05:36:54 by demografx »

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Re: Punning is hard(ly) work! Groaning aloud here?
« Reply #2449 on: 28/07/2012 01:19:21 »
......... it's a bummer.

Getting asteroids can be a pain in uranus. edit [not mine]


Yes. Normally, every day they're a pain.

But on Saturdays? no asteroids!

« Last Edit: 28/07/2012 21:19:37 by demografx »