Punning is hard(ly) work! Is groaning aloud here?

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Offline demografx

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Re: Punning is hard(ly) work! Groaning aloud here?
« Reply #4100 on: 25/10/2014 20:09:38 »

[attachment=19219]

"Phew!!!..."


Uhhhhh.....considering the context here.......please clarify the meaning of that sound.


« Last Edit: 26/10/2014 05:23:55 by demografx »

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Offline Don_1

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Re: Punning is hard(ly) work! Groaning aloud here?
« Reply #4101 on: 27/10/2014 09:45:15 »

.......please clarify the meaning of that sound.


I really should rephewse to do that on the grounds that it might incriminate me. However, under the circumstances and given that there a phew different connotations which anyone phiewing this post could arrive at, I have rephiewed the situation and will attempt to provide some clarity. However, I rephewdiate any misconceptions the reader may arrive at.

This rear phiew of a previous image, lead me to gasp in relief at its content. Since the frontal phiew described the female reproductive system, I was sorely afraid that the rear phiew might describe the……… well I think you get my drift.

I can categorically state that it had nothing to do with any phewmes emanating from this phewture contender for ‘Rear of the Year’.

Now, if you’ll excuse me, as his favourite nephew I must attend to my late uncle’s phewneral with great care if I am to avoid a family phewd.
If brains were made of dynamite, I wouldn't have enough to blow my nose.

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Offline demografx

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Re: Punning is hard(ly) work! Groaning aloud here?
« Reply #4102 on: 27/10/2014 22:29:07 »

.......please clarify the meaning of that sound.


I really should rephewse to do that on the grounds that it might incriminate me. However, under the circumstances and given that there a phew different connotations which anyone phiewing this post could arrive at, I have rephiewed the situation and will attempt to provide some clarity. However, I rephewdiate any misconceptions the reader may arrive at.

This rear phiew of a previous image, lead me to gasp in relief at its content. Since the frontal phiew described the female reproductive system, I was sorely afraid that the rear phiew might describe the……… well I think you get my drift.

I can categorically state that it had nothing to do with any phewmes emanating from this phewture contender for ‘Rear of the Year’.

Now, if you’ll excuse me, as his favourite nephew I must attend to my late uncle’s phewneral with great care if I am to avoid a family phewd.


Phewer than 2 people win this Very Special Award.

Guess who wins?

Our very own Punning Ph.D., Don_1!!!




« Last Edit: 27/10/2014 22:30:47 by demografx »

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Offline demografx

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Re: Punning is hard(ly) work! Groaning aloud here?
« Reply #4103 on: 27/10/2014 22:39:42 »

[attachment=19219]


And also this Award...






« Last Edit: 27/10/2014 22:42:59 by demografx »

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Offline demografx

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Re: Punning is hard(ly) work! Groaning aloud here?
« Reply #4104 on: 28/10/2014 03:17:24 »
Today is Count Your Buttons Day.

Errrrr.......... Ummmmmm..........

NONE. Well that didn't take long, what shall I do for the rest of the day???

AH! Just moment..... I'll sit down here. Now I have one button.

??????????

I have one butt on this chair.

I stared at my belly butt on so much, I was promoted to navel officer.



Ummm, Billy, call the naval officer in for his medication please.





« Last Edit: 28/10/2014 03:52:57 by demografx »

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Offline Don_1

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Re: Punning is hard(ly) work! Groaning aloud here?
« Reply #4105 on: 28/10/2014 08:58:44 »




You're horsing around again, aren't you.
If brains were made of dynamite, I wouldn't have enough to blow my nose.

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Offline Aemilius

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Re: Punning is hard(ly) work! Groaning aloud here?
« Reply #4106 on: 28/10/2014 13:46:58 »
A Fukashima Radiation Alert... CNN - ‎27 minutes ago

A Fukushima Radiation Alert has been issued for the West Coast of the United States, including new clearer information about where it's going. It's an increasingly heated debate among the beach crowd here in Santa Barbara, California. Surfers say they haven't really noticed anything unusual.... "The Fukushima thing is just a pile of nonsense. There's definitely a change in the hair since the meltdowns and everyone's a little uneasy, but we're just out here having a great time. The water's fine, the girls are really HOT and the waves are like totally RAD dude!"

[
« Last Edit: 28/10/2014 13:59:15 by Aemilius »

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Offline demografx

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Re: Punning is hard(ly) work! Groaning aloud here?
« Reply #4107 on: 28/10/2014 16:29:12 »




You're horsing around again, aren't you.


Nah. I'm just being a horse's a** .


« Last Edit: 28/10/2014 16:31:15 by demografx »

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Offline Don_1

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Re: Punning is hard(ly) work! Groaning aloud here?
« Reply #4108 on: 29/10/2014 10:10:15 »




A posh person has asked if this is what they mean by a 'gelding'.


Air, aye sey, is these whhhat they meean, eets been covered in geld all h'over. Haye airbsoluutlay mahrvelhouse.
If brains were made of dynamite, I wouldn't have enough to blow my nose.

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Offline demografx

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Re: Punning is hard(ly) work! Groaning aloud here?
« Reply #4109 on: 29/10/2014 18:51:19 »


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Offline demografx

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Re: Punning is hard(ly) work! Groaning aloud here?
« Reply #4110 on: 29/10/2014 23:26:54 »
This evening, October 30, is:
Haunted Refrigerator Night

He wasn't haunted, but George Westinghouse was a refrigerator magnate.



« Last Edit: 29/10/2014 23:32:24 by demografx »

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Offline Donnah

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Re: Punning is hard(ly) work! Groaning aloud here?
« Reply #4111 on: 30/10/2014 18:16:48 »
"Remember, if you ever need a helping hand, you will find one at the end of each of your arms." - Audrey Hepburn

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Offline demografx

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Re: Punning is hard(ly) work! Groaning aloud here?
« Reply #4112 on: 30/10/2014 22:34:19 »
Yes, Donnah....but no dues required!

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Offline demografx

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Re: Punning is hard(ly) work! Groaning aloud here?
« Reply #4113 on: 30/10/2014 22:49:14 »

.......please clarify the meaning of that sound.


I really should rephewse to do that on the grounds that it might incriminate me. However, under the circumstances and given that there a phew different connotations which anyone phiewing this post could arrive at, I have rephiewed the situation and will attempt to provide some clarity. However, I rephewdiate any misconceptions the reader may arrive at.

This rear phiew of a previous image, lead me to gasp in relief at its content. Since the frontal phiew described the female reproductive system, I was sorely afraid that the rear phiew might describe the……… well I think you get my drift.

I can categorically state that it had nothing to do with any phewmes emanating from this phewture contender for ‘Rear of the Year’.

Now, if you’ll excuse me, as his favourite nephew I must attend to my late uncle’s phewneral with great care if I am to avoid a family phewd.





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Offline Karen W.

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Re: Punning is hard(ly) work! Groaning aloud here?
« Reply #4114 on: 31/10/2014 10:05:31 »
Lol....lol....See what I mean...lol....I like the butt on this chair pretty good but...I could BARELY see The punchline for I was too wooried about my HINDSIGHT..being so far  BEHIND me that I could'nt concentrate on the HOLE in my DONUT as I lined up my SEAT with in it to the chair....lol..

"Life is not measured by the number of Breaths we take, but by the moments that take our breath away."

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Offline Don_1

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Re: Punning is hard(ly) work! Groaning aloud here?
« Reply #4115 on: 31/10/2014 12:17:41 »
I do hope you weren't scraping from the bottom of the barrel Karen.
If brains were made of dynamite, I wouldn't have enough to blow my nose.

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Offline Don_1

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Re: Punning is hard(ly) work! Groaning aloud here?
« Reply #4116 on: 31/10/2014 12:43:20 »
This evening, October 30, is:
Haunted Refrigerator Night

He wasn't haunted, but George Westinghouse was a refrigerator magnate.





Or was he a refrigerator magnet?

[attachment=19235]
If brains were made of dynamite, I wouldn't have enough to blow my nose.

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Offline demografx

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Re: Punning is hard(ly) work! Groaning aloud here?
« Reply #4117 on: 31/10/2014 16:09:20 »




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Offline demografx

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Re: Punning is hard(ly) work! Groaning aloud here?
« Reply #4118 on: 31/10/2014 16:14:47 »
Where's Waldo ??

Where's George ??

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Offline Karen W.

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Re: Punning is hard(ly) work! Groaning aloud here?
« Reply #4119 on: 31/10/2014 20:48:10 »
I do hope you weren't scraping from the bottom of the barrel Karen.
Oh dear..indeed,  scrapping The bottom was merely an inSTINKive MOVEMENT that is RECTEMized by most BUTT heads as a must for ELIMINATING the Terd dangling by a mREAR butt hair ...that has  been growing increasingly annoying, while trying to evacuate from the BACKSIDE, between the BUN isles at the REAR, of the large and small INTESTINE....LOL.... [:I]
« Last Edit: 31/10/2014 20:56:22 by Karen W. »

"Life is not measured by the number of Breaths we take, but by the moments that take our breath away."

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Offline Karen W.

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Re: Punning is hard(ly) work! Groaning aloud here?
« Reply #4120 on: 31/10/2014 20:52:06 »
Its quite, the BUNNY situation when you think about it , but I am ever so happy to say that it always comes out in the END! XXX

"Life is not measured by the number of Breaths we take, but by the moments that take our breath away."

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Offline Don_1

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Re: Punning is hard(ly) work! Groaning aloud here?
« Reply #4121 on: 31/10/2014 23:31:35 »
Karen, I can only offer you the same advice that Mr Spock gave to Capt. Kirk, 'beware the Klingons'.
If brains were made of dynamite, I wouldn't have enough to blow my nose.

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Re: Punning is hard(ly) work! Groaning aloud here?
« Reply #4122 on: 31/10/2014 23:35:20 »
Where's Waldo ??

Where's George ??

I have no idea where George is, but I can tell you that the wall do is holding up the roof.
If brains were made of dynamite, I wouldn't have enough to blow my nose.

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Offline demografx

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Re: Punning is hard(ly) work! Groaning aloud here?
« Reply #4123 on: 01/11/2014 02:32:12 »


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Offline demografx

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Re: Punning is hard(ly) work! Groaning aloud here?
« Reply #4124 on: 01/11/2014 05:06:06 »
Its quite, the BUNNY situation when you think about it , but I am ever so happy to say that it always comes out in the END! XXX

Q. Do you know how to catch a unique bunny?

A. Unique up on it

Q. Do you know how to catch a tame bunny?

A. Tame way!

« Last Edit: 01/11/2014 18:52:30 by demografx »

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Offline Karen W.

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Re: Punning is hard(ly) work! Groaning aloud here?
« Reply #4125 on: 02/11/2014 06:48:52 »
lol...lol....Too cute!! lol..

"Life is not measured by the number of Breaths we take, but by the moments that take our breath away."

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Offline Karen W.

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Re: Punning is hard(ly) work! Groaning aloud here?
« Reply #4126 on: 02/11/2014 06:56:01 »
Karen, I can only offer you the same advice that Mr Spock gave to Capt. Kirk, 'beware the Klingons'.
   Lol...No worries.... I'll use a fish scaler....to remove the ones with a tendency to be Klingons!!!lol...

"Life is not measured by the number of Breaths we take, but by the moments that take our breath away."

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Offline demografx

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Re: Punning is hard(ly) work! Groaning aloud here?
« Reply #4127 on: 03/11/2014 03:06:04 »
Karen, I can only offer you the same advice that Mr Spock gave to Capt. Kirk, 'beware the Klingons'.
   Lol...No worries.... I'll use a fish scaler....to remove the ones with a tendency to be Klingons!!!lol...

Uh oh! I heard that someone just had an explosive passage of gas, I'd say about 8.0 on the sphincter scale.



« Last Edit: 03/11/2014 03:08:31 by demografx »

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Offline demografx

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Re: Punning is hard(ly) work! Groaning aloud here?
« Reply #4128 on: 03/11/2014 03:44:58 »
November, 2014 is:
Adopt A Senior Pet Month
http://www.nhes.org/sections/view/285

See pig photo (above link) as a nice example of how one can pay tribute to this ambitious Month!

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Offline Karen W.

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Re: Punning is hard(ly) work! Groaning aloud here?
« Reply #4129 on: 03/11/2014 06:13:02 »
Karen, I can only offer you the same advice that Mr Spock gave to Capt. Kirk, 'beware the Klingons'.
   Lol...No worries.... I'll use a fish scaler....to remove the ones with a tendency to be Klingons!!!lol...

Uh oh! I heard that someone just had an explosive passage of gas, I'd say about 8.0 on the sphincter scale.




      lol...lol....

"Life is not measured by the number of Breaths we take, but by the moments that take our breath away."

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Offline Don_1

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Re: Punning is hard(ly) work! Groaning aloud here?
« Reply #4130 on: 03/11/2014 08:13:50 »
Today is Cliché Day.

How many science related Clichés will be used by PhDs on this site today?

That will be the acid test.
If brains were made of dynamite, I wouldn't have enough to blow my nose.

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Offline demografx

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Re: Punning is hard(ly) work! Groaning aloud here?
« Reply #4131 on: 03/11/2014 17:49:30 »
Today is Cliché Day.

How many science related Clichés will be used by PhDs on this site today?

That will be the acid test.

Help! No Ph.D., I'm an MBA cid dropout!

edit 'dropout': I didn't complete the former (MBA); I didn't touch the latter (acid).





« Last Edit: 04/11/2014 23:43:54 by demografx »

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Offline demografx

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Re: Punning is hard(ly) work! Groaning aloud here?
« Reply #4132 on: 05/11/2014 02:04:09 »
Saxophone Day, November 6, 2014!
https://www.daysoftheyear.com/days/saxophone-day/


When a musician's toupee fell into his saxophone he blew his top.


« Last Edit: 05/11/2014 07:27:13 by demografx »

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Re: Punning is hard(ly) work! Groaning aloud here?
« Reply #4133 on: 06/11/2014 09:16:59 »
Saxophone Day, November 6, 2014!
https://www.daysoftheyear.com/days/saxophone-day/


When a musician's toupee fell into his saxophone he blew his top.

Surly you mean "....he blew his toupee."

English = too-pay
US English = toop
If brains were made of dynamite, I wouldn't have enough to blow my nose.

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Offline Don_1

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Re: Punning is hard(ly) work! Groaning aloud here?
« Reply #4134 on: 06/11/2014 09:31:07 »
Saxophone Day, November 6, 2014!


Alex said to his lovely young assistant, Clara, "Come, see what I have invented."
Clara puzzled over the object and then asked, "What is it?"
Alex replied, "Why, s'ats a phone.
Yes, Mr Bell was always blowing his own trumpet, but he was no businessman, so Clara netted all the profit.
If brains were made of dynamite, I wouldn't have enough to blow my nose.

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Offline demografx

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Re: Punning is hard(ly) work! Groaning aloud here?
« Reply #4135 on: 07/11/2014 04:49:02 »
Saxophone Day, November 6, 2014!
https://www.daysoftheyear.com/days/saxophone-day/


When a musician's toupee fell into his saxophone he blew his top.

Surly you mean "....he blew his toupee."

English = too-pay
US English = toop
Saxophone Day, November 6, 2014!


Alex said to his lovely young assistant, Clara, "Come, see what I have invented."
Clara puzzled over the object and then asked, "What is it?"
Alex replied, "Why, s'ats a phone.
Yes, Mr Bell was always blowing his own trumpet, but he was no businessman, so Clara netted all the profit.




Yep! That's what they say about Don_1!!

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Offline Don_1

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Re: Punning is hard(ly) work! Groaning aloud here?
« Reply #4136 on: 07/11/2014 17:47:43 »

Yep! That's what they say about Don_1!!


I've never heard anyone say that about me! "Sixty", now that I have heard, though not for some years now

Mind you, I don't hear much at all these days, must be something to do with the tuba glue in my ears. You'll have to whistle to get my attention, but be sure you piccolo note. Don't take my word for it, just try it to corroborate it for yourself.

But I am getting on a bit, everything's confused, even my skeleton. That's why I call it my maelstrom bones.
If brains were made of dynamite, I wouldn't have enough to blow my nose.

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Re: Punning is hard(ly) work! Groaning aloud here?
« Reply #4137 on: 07/11/2014 17:52:46 »

........ I am getting on a bit,


I should be so lucky!!!
If brains were made of dynamite, I wouldn't have enough to blow my nose.

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Re: Punning is hard(ly) work! Groaning aloud here?
« Reply #4138 on: 07/11/2014 18:02:29 »
Today is "Hug a Bear Day".

Not on your nelly!!! What do you take me for??? Don't answer that.

All sounds a bit grizzly to me. I think you need to suffering from bipolar problems to hug a bear.

I've always wanted to take a picture of a wild bear, but alas I have a Nikon. Apparently you need a Kodiak. Well, I'm not going to panda to such niceties. I don't want to make a spectacle of myself.
If brains were made of dynamite, I wouldn't have enough to blow my nose.

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Re: Punning is hard(ly) work! Groaning aloud here?
« Reply #4139 on: 07/11/2014 18:10:09 »
On the matter of bears, did you know that there was the Ailuropoda microta?

Now extinct, this bear is sometimes commonly referred to as the Dwarf Giant Panda or Pygmy Giant Panda.

Since the words 'dwarf' and 'pygmy' rather tend to cancel out 'giant', why isn't it just known as the 'Panda'???
If brains were made of dynamite, I wouldn't have enough to blow my nose.

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Offline RD

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Re: Punning is hard(ly) work! Groaning aloud here?
« Reply #4140 on: 07/11/2014 20:29:58 »
Today is "Hug a Bear Day"

This should be the official dress code ... http://youtu.be/h0cfsHGjC_g?t=41s

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Offline demografx

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Re: Punning is hard(ly) work! Groaning aloud here?
« Reply #4141 on: 07/11/2014 21:23:12 »

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Offline demografx

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Re: Punning is hard(ly) work! Groaning aloud here?
« Reply #4142 on: 07/11/2014 22:11:11 »





Yep! That's what they say about Don_1!!


I've never heard anyone say that about me!


Don_1, wake up!

They all talk behind your sax!



« Last Edit: 07/11/2014 22:20:01 by demografx »

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Offline demografx

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Re: Punning is hard(ly) work! Groaning aloud here?
« Reply #4143 on: 08/11/2014 03:42:48 »

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Re: Punning is hard(ly) work! Groaning aloud here?
« Reply #4144 on: 08/11/2014 14:57:16 »
Today is "Hug a Bear Day"

This should be the official dress code ... http://youtu.be/h0cfsHGjC_g?t=41s


....and this the song??? http://wn.com/huggy_bear_(band)

Its riot grrrl band.
If brains were made of dynamite, I wouldn't have enough to blow my nose.

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Offline Don_1

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Re: Punning is hard(ly) work! Groaning aloud here?
« Reply #4145 on: 08/11/2014 15:04:44 »

Nah. I'm just being a horse's a** .


UK = a***

I thought we were just two peoples divided by a common language. I didn't realise we were also divided by an asterisk!
If brains were made of dynamite, I wouldn't have enough to blow my nose.

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Re: Punning is hard(ly) work! Groaning aloud here?
« Reply #4146 on: 08/11/2014 15:07:51 »
Today is National Dunce Day.

Funny, I thought my birthday was in August.
If brains were made of dynamite, I wouldn't have enough to blow my nose.

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Re: Punning is hard(ly) work! Groaning aloud here?
« Reply #4147 on: 08/11/2014 15:12:17 »
YES FOLKS, ITS TRUE TODAY IS
Abet and Aid Punsters Day
If brains were made of dynamite, I wouldn't have enough to blow my nose.

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Re: Punning is hard(ly) work! Groaning aloud here?
« Reply #4148 on: 08/11/2014 15:14:30 »
Look into my ayes = PUNSTARES
If brains were made of dynamite, I wouldn't have enough to blow my nose.

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Offline Don_1

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Re: Punning is hard(ly) work! Groaning aloud here?
« Reply #4149 on: 08/11/2014 15:16:05 »
Sell this escalator = PAWNSTAIRS
If brains were made of dynamite, I wouldn't have enough to blow my nose.