Punning is hard(ly) work! Is groaning aloud here?

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Offline demografx

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Re: Punning is hard(ly) work! Groaning aloud here?
« Reply #50 on: 09/06/2010 00:56:42 »
                             

        She had a boyfriend with a wooden leg, but broke it off.


Surely that's a matter of a pinion?


Well, as a next STEP, I suppose that we could go get your proctologist's assessment.
 

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Offline JimBob

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Re: Punning is hard(ly) work! Groaning aloud here?
« Reply #51 on: 09/06/2010 01:00:15 »
But a pinions are like arse holes - everyone has one.
The mind is like a parachute. It works best when open.  -- A. Einstein

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Offline demografx

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Re: Punning is hard(ly) work! Groaning aloud here?
« Reply #52 on: 09/06/2010 01:09:09 »

And everyone thinks everyone else's stinks.

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Offline Geezer

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Re: Punning is hard(ly) work! Groaning aloud here?
« Reply #53 on: 09/06/2010 01:13:30 »
Some people have several.
There ain'ta no sanity clause, and there ain'ta no centrifugal force ćther.

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Offline demografx

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Re: Punning is hard(ly) work! Groaning aloud here?
« Reply #54 on: 09/06/2010 01:34:26 »

                    

         When you've seen one shopping center you've seen a mall.

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Offline geo driver

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Re: Punning is hard(ly) work! Groaning aloud here?
« Reply #55 on: 09/06/2010 05:57:53 »
demo good pic looks the the galreys l'afiette
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Offline Geezer

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Re: Punning is hard(ly) work! Groaning aloud here?
« Reply #56 on: 09/06/2010 06:04:11 »

When you've seen one shopping center you've seen a mall.


Which only goes to show,

"It's a mall World after all."
There ain'ta no sanity clause, and there ain'ta no centrifugal force ćther.

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Offline demografx

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Re: Punning is hard(ly) work! Groaning aloud here?
« Reply #57 on: 09/06/2010 22:56:58 »

                       

                         It's a small world after Walt.

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Offline demografx

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Re: Punning is hard(ly) work! Groaning aloud here?
« Reply #58 on: 10/06/2010 16:59:24 »

                      


                       If you jump off a Paris bridge, you're in Seine.

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Offline geo driver

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Re: Punning is hard(ly) work! Groaning aloud here?
« Reply #59 on: 10/06/2010 22:24:57 »
or drunk and Parisletic
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Offline geo driver

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Re: Punning is hard(ly) work! Groaning aloud here?
« Reply #60 on: 10/06/2010 22:31:00 »
charles de gaulle etoile at night, the parisians saw the dark de triumph
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Offline Geezer

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Re: Punning is hard(ly) work! Groaning aloud here?
« Reply #61 on: 11/06/2010 06:25:29 »
charles de gaulle etoile at night, the parisians saw the dark de triumph

Did he take his lawnmower there to coup de grace?

Isn't the "dark de triumph" the motorbike Batman rides?

and if that wasn't punishing enough

(drum roll)

http://www.thenakedscientists.com/forum/index.php?topic=32020.msg312324#msg312324
« Last Edit: 11/06/2010 06:34:53 by Geezer »
There ain'ta no sanity clause, and there ain'ta no centrifugal force ćther.

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Offline JimBob

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Re: Punning is hard(ly) work! Groaning aloud here?
« Reply #62 on: 11/06/2010 17:17:29 »
With those types of remarks in the last post, would someone please like to recommend a PUNishment for Greezer?
The mind is like a parachute. It works best when open.  -- A. Einstein

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Offline Geezer

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Re: Punning is hard(ly) work! Groaning aloud here?
« Reply #63 on: 11/06/2010 19:15:53 »
With those types of remarks in the last post, would someone please like to recommend a PUNishment for Greezer?

Hey! If you thought that was bad, try this:

Would a Pičce de résistance be the same as 1 Ω ?
There ain'ta no sanity clause, and there ain'ta no centrifugal force ćther.

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Offline demografx

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Re: Punning is hard(ly) work! Groaning aloud here?
« Reply #64 on: 12/06/2010 01:45:10 »


With those types of remarks in the last post, would someone please like to recommend a PUNishment for Greezer?


I looked through the Punning Thread Criminal Code and found no punalty where the punishment fits the crime. Lawnmowers and Batman rides are not punishable by Code. Thus decreed.

                    

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Offline demografx

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Re: Punning is hard(ly) work! Groaning aloud here?
« Reply #65 on: 12/06/2010 02:06:11 »

One day Queen Elizabeth the First got so sick and tired of all the puns in Shakespeare's plays that she summoned him to her court.  "Master Shakespeare," she angrily said, "one more pun out of you, I'll have you hanged!"  He replied, "Your Majesty, does this mean you'll make me your poet lariat?"

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Offline demografx

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Re: Punning is hard(ly) work! Groaning aloud here?
« Reply #66 on: 12/06/2010 02:18:19 »

                          

Thanks to geo driver for informing us of an appropriate beer to drink while contemplating jumping!

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Offline Geezer

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Re: Punning is hard(ly) work! Groaning aloud here?
« Reply #67 on: 12/06/2010 02:43:18 »


With those types of remarks in the last post, would someone please like to recommend a PUNishment for Greezer?


I looked through the Punning Thread Criminal Code and found no punalty where the punishment fits the crime. Lawnmowers and Batman rides are not punishable by Code. Thus decreed.

                    

I hope there would be no punitive damages.
There ain'ta no sanity clause, and there ain'ta no centrifugal force ćther.

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Offline Geezer

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Re: Punning is hard(ly) work! Groaning aloud here?
« Reply #68 on: 12/06/2010 02:55:50 »

One day Queen Elizabeth the First got so sick and tired of all the puns in Shakespeare's plays that she summoned him to her court.  "Master Shakespeare," she angrily said, "one more pun out of you, I'll have you hanged!"  He replied, "Your Majesty, does this mean you'll make me your poet lariat?"


You mean like John Bitumen?
« Last Edit: 12/06/2010 04:10:08 by Geezer »
There ain'ta no sanity clause, and there ain'ta no centrifugal force ćther.

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Offline demografx

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Re: Punning is hard(ly) work! Groaning aloud here?
« Reply #69 on: 12/06/2010 04:43:33 »


I hope there would be no punitive damages.


None, unless you expressed some fairly pungent criticisms.

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Offline demografx

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Re: Punning is hard(ly) work! Groaning aloud here?
« Reply #70 on: 13/06/2010 03:38:48 »

                      

   Contacts are easy to lose, so keep your eyes on them

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Offline Geezer

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Re: Punning is hard(ly) work! Groaning aloud here?
« Reply #71 on: 13/06/2010 05:18:10 »

Contacts are easy to lose, so keep your eyes on them


That's not really necessary as long as you keep in contact.
There ain'ta no sanity clause, and there ain'ta no centrifugal force ćther.

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Offline demografx

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Re: Punning is hard(ly) work! Groaning aloud here?
« Reply #72 on: 13/06/2010 05:32:55 »

True, Geezer, being in touch is key. I do see that.

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Offline geo driver

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Re: Punning is hard(ly) work! Groaning aloud here?
« Reply #73 on: 13/06/2010 19:02:00 »
yep and i have brew many a beer like that.  well i was there brewer and now a manager
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Offline demografx

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Re: Punning is hard(ly) work! Groaning aloud here?
« Reply #74 on: 13/06/2010 21:11:57 »

geo driver, that is beery impressive!

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Offline demografx

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Re: Punning is hard(ly) work! Groaning aloud here?
« Reply #75 on: 13/06/2010 21:19:51 »

                     

     What's the definition of a will? (It's a dead giveaway).

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Offline JimBob

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Re: Punning is hard(ly) work! Groaning aloud here?
« Reply #76 on: 14/06/2010 04:29:43 »
and is the thing that holds the coffin together called a potlatch?

(http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Potlatch for you Englisher's

1-1 tie!)


The mind is like a parachute. It works best when open.  -- A. Einstein

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Offline Geezer

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Re: Punning is hard(ly) work! Groaning aloud here?
« Reply #77 on: 15/06/2010 00:57:21 »
There ain'ta no sanity clause, and there ain'ta no centrifugal force ćther.

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Offline demografx

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Re: Punning is hard(ly) work! Groaning aloud here?
« Reply #78 on: 15/06/2010 03:53:20 »

Oh, you're just dying for attention. Drop the pretense.

                     

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Offline Geezer

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Re: Punning is hard(ly) work! Groaning aloud here?
« Reply #79 on: 15/06/2010 18:04:12 »

Drop the pretense.


Shouldn't that be "future tense"?
There ain'ta no sanity clause, and there ain'ta no centrifugal force ćther.

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Offline demografx

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Re: Punning is hard(ly) work! Groaning aloud here?
« Reply #80 on: 15/06/2010 22:33:16 »

Well, the future of entertainment might be in tents.

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Offline Geezer

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Re: Punning is hard(ly) work! Groaning aloud here?
« Reply #81 on: 16/06/2010 02:58:09 »
Tentatively, big tops might be the way to go.
There ain'ta no sanity clause, and there ain'ta no centrifugal force ćther.

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Offline demografx

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Re: Punning is hard(ly) work! Groaning aloud here?
« Reply #82 on: 16/06/2010 05:45:49 »

What does Dolly Parton have to do with all this?

Oh, entertainment. Of course! Why didn't I see that?

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Offline Geezer

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Re: Punning is hard(ly) work! Groaning aloud here?
« Reply #83 on: 16/06/2010 06:21:41 »
You're right. Dolly has no part on this.
There ain'ta no sanity clause, and there ain'ta no centrifugal force ćther.

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Offline geo driver

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Re: Punning is hard(ly) work! Groaning aloud here?
« Reply #84 on: 16/06/2010 10:51:46 »
never been into sheep, too country side
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Offline demografx

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Re: Punning is hard(ly) work! Groaning aloud here?
« Reply #85 on: 16/06/2010 18:19:18 »

Then ewe don't know what you're bleating about.

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Offline demografx

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Re: Punning is hard(ly) work! Groaning aloud here?
« Reply #86 on: 16/06/2010 18:26:36 »



      Dolly               Dolly

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Offline neilep

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Re: Punning is hard(ly) work! Groaning aloud here?
« Reply #87 on: 16/06/2010 18:52:30 »
Did someone mention sheep ?

Men are the same as women, just inside out !

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Offline Geezer

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Re: Punning is hard(ly) work! Groaning aloud here?
« Reply #88 on: 16/06/2010 20:30:21 »
Uh oh!

JimBob must have hacked Neil's password.

Unless, could it actually be...

"The Return of the Wooly Jumper"

And I don't mean he's taking it back to M&S.

(Stay tuned for more exciting episodes.)
There ain'ta no sanity clause, and there ain'ta no centrifugal force ćther.

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Offline neilep

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Re: Punning is hard(ly) work! Groaning aloud here?
« Reply #89 on: 16/06/2010 20:35:12 »
Yessireebob,

yee haww....I'm a Texan wh-ewe has hacked sheepies password...guffaw guffaw !!

Y'all come back now and y'all have a nice day y'hear ?..gawwd bless america land and our king Elvis...yee haww !! ride em cowboy !!

Sheepy JimBob !
Men are the same as women, just inside out !

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Offline Make it Lady

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Re: Punning is hard(ly) work! Groaning aloud here?
« Reply #90 on: 16/06/2010 21:02:01 »
Neilie, I'll ride you any day. I could use your suzzies as styrups.
Give a man a fire and he is warm for a day, set a man on fire and he is warm for the rest of his life.

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Offline demografx

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Re: Punning is hard(ly) work! Groaning aloud here?
« Reply #91 on: 16/06/2010 22:12:54 »

Now let's not stirrup any trubble heah.

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Offline JimBob

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Re: Punning is hard(ly) work! Groaning aloud here?
« Reply #92 on: 17/06/2010 02:14:41 »
Hey, I like stirrup on pancakes and waffles!
The mind is like a parachute. It works best when open.  -- A. Einstein

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Offline Geezer

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Re: Punning is hard(ly) work! Groaning aloud here?
« Reply #93 on: 17/06/2010 02:45:45 »
Hey, I like stirrup on pancakes and waffles!

They don't call him "Sticky Jimmy" for nuthin'
There ain'ta no sanity clause, and there ain'ta no centrifugal force ćther.

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Offline JimBob

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Re: Punning is hard(ly) work! Groaning aloud here?
« Reply #94 on: 17/06/2010 03:50:04 »
Stucky's? Isn't that a place on the Interstate?
The mind is like a parachute. It works best when open.  -- A. Einstein

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Offline demografx

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Re: Punning is hard(ly) work! Groaning aloud here?
« Reply #95 on: 17/06/2010 04:32:11 »


Places on the interstate always take a toll on me.

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Offline Geezer

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Re: Punning is hard(ly) work! Groaning aloud here?
« Reply #96 on: 17/06/2010 06:20:11 »
When the bell tolls, it's best not to be interstate. When there is no will, there is no way to avoid a fight.
 
« Last Edit: 17/06/2010 06:35:50 by Geezer »
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Offline demografx

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Re: Punning is hard(ly) work! Groaning aloud here?
« Reply #97 on: 17/06/2010 16:03:36 »

                  

Congraduations to all of you commencing to graduate ceremoniously this fine June - and to the convocation of the graduating classes' friends, neighbors and relatives!

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Offline demografx

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Re: Punning is hard(ly) work! Groaning aloud here?
« Reply #98 on: 17/06/2010 19:13:22 »

Hey, I like stirrup on pancakes and waffles!


             


        But what if the waitress doesn't have stirrup-pants?

« Last Edit: 17/06/2010 19:17:33 by demografx »

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Offline Make it Lady

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Re: Punning is hard(ly) work! Groaning aloud here?
« Reply #99 on: 17/06/2010 21:38:37 »
You lot can do enough pants over waitresses, stirrup or other.
Give a man a fire and he is warm for a day, set a man on fire and he is warm for the rest of his life.