JimBob

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Offline JimBob

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« Reply #150 on: 27/09/2010 18:07:43 »
No twaddle indeed Sire.
May I say that I'm pleased to hear that your imperial personage are recovering from the stings and arrows abundant mortality heaps upon us all. It seems you have upset a member of your, ah, I meant, sorry Sir, I seem to have mislaid my thoughts? A moment while I search for my mind..

(Never, ever get a person of the fairer ahem mad at you. And if you do, blame it on Yorick)

My Dear Earl of Gotland,

We thank you for your sage Council. It reminds Us only of that which we have intuitively known since being at our mothers breast - never bite the nipple that feeds you. The other sex in unfathomable; and perhaps a slight bit more shrewish.


How about blaming Banquoe's ghost? No need to stick with only one play.

« Last Edit: 27/09/2010 18:57:39 by JimBob »
The mind is like a parachute. It works best when open.  -- A. Einstein

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Offline Don_1

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« Reply #151 on: 27/09/2010 18:10:49 »
Oh! Woe, woe and thrice woe!

Come hither good folk of TNS and pay heed to my tale, for I suffer greatly.

Our most benevolent Lord and Master bade me:
Please, accept our hospitality and take your pick from the Royal concubines,
And I did partake of his most kind gesture. But alas, I paid not good attention to his most generous offer and took, for my pleasure a Porcupine.

Woe, woe and thrice woe!

The physician has said there will be no lasting damage unto my person and placed upon me a poultice of eye of toad, wing of bat, Lark's vomit and the droppings of a goat fed on hardboiled egg and sprout vindaloo for three weeks.

I speak to ye all now from the place unto which I have been banished until my fragrance is a little more acceptable.

Oh! Woe, woe and thrice woe!
If brains were made of dynamite, I wouldn't have enough to blow my nose.

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Offline Geezer

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« Reply #152 on: 27/09/2010 18:51:25 »

The physician has said there will be no lasting damage unto my person and placed upon me a poultice of eye of toad, wing of bat, Lark's vomit and the droppings of a goat fed on hardboiled egg and sprout vindaloo for three weeks.


Gadzooks Sir. Knoweth not that thy physician is a popinjay, nay even the bahoochie of an old mare? The potion is lacking of the most vital ingredient - pish of newt.
There ain'ta no sanity clause, and there ain'ta no centrifugal force Šther.

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Offline Don_1

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« Reply #153 on: 27/09/2010 19:14:57 »
Oh! Woe ,woe and thrice woe, for my physician is but a quack and a charlatan, for he hath omitted an ingredient most vital from my poultice. But I cannot go thither unto him to correct this most dastardly error, for my aroma is too powerful by far. The guards shall not allow me to pass into the kingdom of TNS.

I shall search the swamps of this place to locate a Newt and ask of it the pleasure of his ................................... AGhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh I hath fallen in the bog!
If brains were made of dynamite, I wouldn't have enough to blow my nose.

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Offline Geezer

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« Reply #154 on: 27/09/2010 20:17:22 »
Most calamitous Sir! We pray that thy wifey flusheth not the privy.
There ain'ta no sanity clause, and there ain'ta no centrifugal force Šther.

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Offline yor_on

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« Reply #155 on: 28/09/2010 11:56:57 »
Sire, as your physician I must say that I'm saddened to read such bladderdash.

Let it be know that I by the court of the Persian Empire, Mogul of the hordes, as well as the enlightened ruler of the not to distant 0Z received my apostolate in where he, or they as the correct pronunciation well should be, fell upon his very knees as he dubbed me Wizard of the spheres. Master of toads, as well as the 'Reason Why Worlds Turn'. And not away, if I may hasten to add? Nay Sire, towards naturally, towards Sire! if I might say so, and I might, I just might. The untotalled glimmering wholesome fullness of thought my mighty intellect presents all that bask in its glory a safe harbor.

Alas.

But you Sir, you will now find yourself sadly amiss of that glory, drifting in a sea of bewilderment, cast upon the waves, as the saying goes, of your privy. I will take me leave proudly knowing that your thoughts are as bladderwort to my mind.
« Last Edit: 28/09/2010 15:26:46 by yor_on »
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Offline JimBob

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« Reply #156 on: 28/09/2010 13:15:10 »
Our most sincere condolences, Duke Don

Me thinkith the Earl of Gotland has to the mead horn turned and emptied once too many times this night.

(Did ANYONE understand that last post???????????)

Duke Don, We sus fowl play. One of Our concubines was presented to me by a potentate of the East accompanied by a peacock. Having much an attraction for the tail feathers of the bird, the badger hounds, the pets of my small niece, tormented the beautiful bird's posterior until only sharp shafts of the birds tail feathers remained.

I am sure you were not so far into your cups that thou didst not deceive you yourself so grossly as choosing a porcupine - you chose the same said Eastern concubine and when you retired to her chambers, the witchy woman transposed herself with the fowl, thus causing the inter species mating and confusion. 

We shall have the Master of Dungeons pay a "visit" to said recalcitrant person.

Lastly, We are sending our page to you with a gallon of a new French fad, perfume. Just use a quarter cup a day over your body and you will be only as odoriferous as any other person in Paris. The page will also gift you with an additional boon - a passage to Paris where you may heal in comfort and luxury, then return to court when you give off a odoure less like the stableboy's cursed uncle who owns a polecat farm.

On last thing, my loyal Duke, Our confinement has lead to ennui. Although tragic in the extreme, much mirth has been derived by Us from your misfortune. NA! Think not we revel in anything thou may suffer; rather we are quite amused by the part of you that so naturally reflects the human condition.

« Last Edit: 28/09/2010 13:17:34 by JimBob »
The mind is like a parachute. It works best when open.  -- A. Einstein

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Offline yor_on

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« Reply #157 on: 28/09/2010 13:46:05 »
As a legitimated physician I must protest at the sharpest. Although it well known that the posterior shine at times, it do not reflect, unless polished. As for the rest of my post it was perfectly understandable.

To me, that is :)
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Offline Don_1

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« Reply #158 on: 28/09/2010 15:32:07 »
I can confirm, Master Physician, that I didst comprehend thine posting well, but, I must confess, only after the consumption of several flagons of the fabled "Mrs Winterbottom's triple strength Strong Ale", described by aficionado's of the alcoholic beverage as being not too dissimilar to a mixture of rocket fuel and sheep dip concentrate. Also an excellent medium for the clearing of blocked drains.

Having partly recovered from my stupor, I can understand none of it!

If brains were made of dynamite, I wouldn't have enough to blow my nose.

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Offline JimBob

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« Reply #159 on: 28/09/2010 19:13:02 »
Forsooth, dear Your_on. I do believe you are having Us on. Drivel, balderdash and the exude of a "worried" mind seems most apropos to describe the verbiage previously provide. Our remarks do not mean we are not pleased. Na, my good Earl, We are quite amused. It provides a lulling divertimento in words between the exigencies of the day.

The mind is like a parachute. It works best when open.  -- A. Einstein

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Offline neilep

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« Reply #160 on: 28/09/2010 19:14:04 »
Does anyone know how JimBob is doing ?






























 [;)]
Men are the same as women, just inside out !

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Offline Geezer

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« Reply #161 on: 28/09/2010 19:33:24 »
Good question. We've not heard from him for some time  [::)]
There ain'ta no sanity clause, and there ain'ta no centrifugal force Šther.

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Offline neilep

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« Reply #162 on: 28/09/2010 19:54:14 »
I hope he's Ok !  [::)]
Men are the same as women, just inside out !

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Offline Don_1

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« Reply #163 on: 28/09/2010 21:57:13 »
Does anyone know how JimBob is doing ?

I do believe he is spending some considerable time on the throne.
If brains were made of dynamite, I wouldn't have enough to blow my nose.

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Offline Make it Lady

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« Reply #164 on: 28/09/2010 22:32:46 »
I think he is spending time on a medieval throne judging by his gadsoothing. I doubt he is ready for this buck some serving wench.
Give a man a fire and he is warm for a day, set a man on fire and he is warm for the rest of his life.

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Offline JimBob

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« Reply #165 on: 29/09/2010 01:04:38 »
Why buck a serving wench when the nurses are so amenable?

Update: Recovery proceeds apace. The fatigue of failing health for three years is rather quickly dissolving but there is a heck of a way to go. We have not been strong for over a year with decreasing health ever day since that time. About 2 weeks before hospitalization We thought that the inevitable outcome was to be in a nursing home (elder care facility) by October. We believe that would have been in one soon had the acute manifestation of the pancreatitis not occurred.

There is one major problem at this facility. The diet. Not only is it not very good to begin with, but the dietitian is unable or unwilling to provide a pancreas-friendly diet: low fat, high protein, preferably vegetable protein, and no geriatric portions. We need food to build the 30 or so pounds of muscle mass to rebuild - didn't eat for 3 weeks while suffering the acute phase the pancreatitis.

The mind is like a parachute. It works best when open.  -- A. Einstein

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Offline yor_on

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« Reply #166 on: 29/09/2010 01:09:50 »
Who's Jim Bob?
"BOMB DISPOSAL EXPERT. If you see me running, try to keep up."

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Offline yor_on

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« Reply #167 on: 29/09/2010 01:16:11 »

                                                                                                                    ahem..
"BOMB DISPOSAL EXPERT. If you see me running, try to keep up."

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Offline yor_on

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« Reply #168 on: 29/09/2010 02:15:04 »
And
     Ouch JB.

That sounds somewhat un-nutritious.
Maybe your doctor can arrange something?
At least make sure you're fed and full.

Doest nor worry though, as a physician, for now finding me unemployed and rather in a haste as my new master somehow have gotten it in his head to suspect me, me?? Me !! Poisoning?  So it goes when one present new culinary products for the ignoramus masses. My simple remedy of roasted toad-legs dipped in a wholesome sauce of belladonna and Devils weed called ..  poison? Ah well, forgiveness is the true sign of greatness so I will only smile as I write you, sweetly perhaps with a touch of a thoughtful expression, well aimed to present my mirror the true dignity and noblesse of a peer of the realm. I will make all speed and lengthen my stride to come to your side Sire, do not despair. Bringing with me a strict diet of such vegetarian delicatessen as the single malt, the answer to all occasions Sire, slightly tanged with garlic and the root of, let us name not that now, a experiment that, if I may add, have given this wholesome elixir a whole new dimension of fruity zaniness...

(Anyway, maybe a nurse or two could serve too?
 Do not hesitate to ask for a bigger pot, and measure them most carefully.)
"BOMB DISPOSAL EXPERT. If you see me running, try to keep up."

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Offline neilep

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« Reply #169 on: 29/09/2010 05:37:14 »
Well, if anyone does hear how he is ....will ewe please let us know....we miss the old fart chap !!
Men are the same as women, just inside out !

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Offline Geezer

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« Reply #170 on: 29/09/2010 05:49:08 »
Last I heard, him and that Poxy Lady had buggered orf taken a hike to Bora Bora for some R&R, or maybe it was M&S? Anyway, it was obvious to me there was something going on there, if you know what I mean.
There ain'ta no sanity clause, and there ain'ta no centrifugal force Šther.

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Offline Make it Lady

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« Reply #171 on: 29/09/2010 19:34:23 »
He has both pox and Lady. He has animal magnetism. Yes even the drummer from the muppets is stuck to him!
Give a man a fire and he is warm for a day, set a man on fire and he is warm for the rest of his life.

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Offline JimBob

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« Reply #172 on: 29/09/2010 20:40:59 »
Nudge, nudge, wink, wink

 [;D] [;D] [;D] [:X] [:X] [:X] [;D] [;D] [;D] [:X] [:X] [:X] [;D] [;D] [;D]
The mind is like a parachute. It works best when open.  -- A. Einstein

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Offline Geezer

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« Reply #173 on: 29/09/2010 22:00:37 »
.

[attachment=13033]

There's JimBob right there!
There ain'ta no sanity clause, and there ain'ta no centrifugal force Šther.

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Offline Geezer

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« Reply #174 on: 29/09/2010 22:11:28 »
JimBob,

Glad to hear you are no longer having perpetual motions.
There ain'ta no sanity clause, and there ain'ta no centrifugal force Šther.

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Offline JimBob

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« Reply #175 on: 30/09/2010 12:48:15 »
We have never had a palsy.
The mind is like a parachute. It works best when open.  -- A. Einstein

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Offline Make it Lady

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« Reply #176 on: 30/09/2010 16:49:16 »
Is JimBob the one casting the enormous shadow?
Give a man a fire and he is warm for a day, set a man on fire and he is warm for the rest of his life.

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Offline JimBob

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« Reply #177 on: 30/09/2010 23:30:00 »
Royalty does cast a shadow much greater than themselves.
The mind is like a parachute. It works best when open.  -- A. Einstein

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Offline demografx

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« Reply #178 on: 01/10/2010 04:07:51 »

Shadow size isn't everything.

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Offline SeanB

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« Reply #179 on: 01/10/2010 21:04:37 »
But at least there is one thing in common with all shadows, they all have the same weight and mass........

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Offline Make it Lady

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« Reply #180 on: 01/10/2010 22:52:15 »
Unless you are the shadow monsters from the library episode of doctor who.
Give a man a fire and he is warm for a day, set a man on fire and he is warm for the rest of his life.

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Offline yor_on

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« Reply #181 on: 02/10/2010 17:44:12 »
JB, After long and deliberate thinking, involving even such things as thoughts, I've decided to link you to the ultimate explanation of why we all are here, or was, as it seems following the explanation.

No, I can't swear to it all being exactly as stated, but I too have noticed the way towels appear and disappear, without explanation. I would call that a clear experimental proof myself, although I might be biased?

Why ! _ ?
"BOMB DISPOSAL EXPERT. If you see me running, try to keep up."

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Offline Make it Lady

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« Reply #182 on: 02/10/2010 18:27:03 »
When towels disappear they always re appear on a deck chair, by a swimming pool hotel. Don't you just hate those towels that sunbath all day, taking up a whole deck chair all day.
Give a man a fire and he is warm for a day, set a man on fire and he is warm for the rest of his life.

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Offline yor_on

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« Reply #183 on: 02/10/2010 20:24:51 »
And they neither need sun lotion nor sunglasses?
Is that why we are here?

To serve the towels?
"BOMB DISPOSAL EXPERT. If you see me running, try to keep up."

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Offline Geezer

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« Reply #184 on: 02/10/2010 21:15:43 »
I dunno, but I'm pretty sure those expletive towels will be the thing that triggers the next World War.
There ain'ta no sanity clause, and there ain'ta no centrifugal force Šther.

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« Reply #185 on: 03/10/2010 15:47:21 »
What hubris!!  Even towels know We are in charge of all things involving physical manifestations, including war.

Hurrmph!
_______________

NEWS

Scheduled to proceed apace to the keep of Clingpoint Castle at The Lake Travis Estates Wednesday next. We should be able to do this with little interruption to Our health or well-being.

The mind is like a parachute. It works best when open.  -- A. Einstein

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Offline Make it Lady

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« Reply #186 on: 03/10/2010 20:00:45 »
Watch out for Klingons!
Give a man a fire and he is warm for a day, set a man on fire and he is warm for the rest of his life.

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Offline peppercorn

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« Reply #187 on: 03/10/2010 20:30:50 »

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Offline Geezer

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« Reply #188 on: 03/10/2010 20:42:18 »
A little light reading for you JB.

[attachment=13109]
There ain'ta no sanity clause, and there ain'ta no centrifugal force Šther.

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Offline JimBob

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« Reply #189 on: 03/10/2010 23:52:42 »
Our, Our, Our, ("my, my, my" for the ordinary person)
 
What a WASTE OF TIME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

The person so lame as to learn Klingon and then read Hamlet in that same "language" has no life or is so in need of escape from his or her own reality that they MUST escape. It would be more fruitful to learn Sanskrit of Mandarin Chinese.

Is Mrs. Geezer that difficult to live with?
The mind is like a parachute. It works best when open.  -- A. Einstein

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Offline Don_1

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« Reply #190 on: 04/10/2010 11:13:12 »
How doust thy fare this morn Sire?

Hast thou driven out the evil which was within you?
If brains were made of dynamite, I wouldn't have enough to blow my nose.

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« Reply #191 on: 04/10/2010 14:53:07 »
How doust thy fare this morn Sire?

Hast thou driven out the evil which was within you?

Our sorcerers & mages as well as the Cordoban Physicians have succeeded in driving most of the vile humors out of the corpus royal. Some small residue remains but is at a level at which even an apprentice can manage. With the experts at hand a full recovery is expected. The main problem to then consider is the large amount of muscle wasting  that has occurred. We shall be visiting the gym regularly.

We thank you for your concern, Duke Don.
The mind is like a parachute. It works best when open.  -- A. Einstein

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Offline yor_on

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« Reply #192 on: 04/10/2010 16:07:04 »
"vile humors out of the corpus royal." ?
What wine be that Sir?

Red?
Or White?

And if there are 'muscle' waiting, warn them to behave..
Thy areth not whitoust friends..

TNS be with you.

"BOMB DISPOSAL EXPERT. If you see me running, try to keep up."

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Offline JimBob

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« Reply #193 on: 04/10/2010 17:23:09 »
And with you, my dear Earl.
The mind is like a parachute. It works best when open.  -- A. Einstein

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Offline Geezer

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« Reply #194 on: 04/10/2010 20:51:43 »
Huh! I though it was only people in Texas that went by Earl. It must be quite common in Sweden too.

That's what I like about TNS. You learn something new every day.
There ain'ta no sanity clause, and there ain'ta no centrifugal force Šther.

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Offline Make it Lady

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« Reply #195 on: 04/10/2010 21:22:24 »
Our, Our, Our, ("my, my, my" for the ordinary person)
 
What a WASTE OF TIME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

The person so lame as to learn Klingon and then read Hamlet in that same "language" has no life or is so in need of escape from his or her own reality that they MUST escape. It would be more fruitful to learn Sanskrit of Mandarin Chinese.




Is Mrs. Geezer that difficult to live with?
Murray has learnt navi from avatar. He has learnt how a new language can be constructed and from that a lot about the structures of other languages. I think there is more than one dimension to learning these constructed languages. what started off with Murray as a bit of a laugh to do has lead him to other areas of learning. Much more productive than watching the TV.
Give a man a fire and he is warm for a day, set a man on fire and he is warm for the rest of his life.

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Offline JimBob

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« Reply #196 on: 05/10/2010 20:56:46 »
Our, Our, Our, ("my, my, my" for the ordinary person)
 
What a WASTE OF TIME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

The person so lame as to learn Klingon and then read Hamlet in that same "language" has no life or is so in need of escape from his or her own reality that they MUST escape. It would be more fruitful to learn Sanskrit of Mandarin Chinese.




Is Mrs. Geezer that difficult to live with?
Murray has learnt navi from avatar. He has learnt how a new language can be constructed and from that a lot about the structures of other languages. I think there is more than one dimension to learning these constructed languages. what started off with Murray as a bit of a laugh to do has lead him to other areas of learning. Much more productive than watching the TV.

Shazza, we do not include the benefits Murry receives from such endeavors as "wasted time." The persons We speak of are the nerds and geeks with no lives and no imagination whose only outlet is a Star Trek Fan Club. Now THAT to Us is a waste of time.
The mind is like a parachute. It works best when open.  -- A. Einstein

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Offline Geezer

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JimBob
« Reply #197 on: 05/10/2010 21:20:19 »
Shazza, we do not include the benefits Murry receives from such endeavors as "wasted time." The persons We speak of are the nerds and geeks with no lives and no imagination whose only outlet is a Star Trek Fan Club. Now THAT to Us is a waste of time.

SoH DIchDaq bech vaD vam!
There ain'ta no sanity clause, and there ain'ta no centrifugal force Šther.

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Offline Make it Lady

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« Reply #198 on: 05/10/2010 21:42:26 »
I luff star trek. what is wrong with living in a fantasy world. Just got to go and feed my unicorn. The sprignols of Karach are coming over later to play 5 dimensional tennis.
Give a man a fire and he is warm for a day, set a man on fire and he is warm for the rest of his life.

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Offline demografx

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« Reply #199 on: 06/10/2010 05:27:25 »

But at least there is one thing in common with all shadows, they all have the same weight and mass........


Sean, that is heavy news!