... but not a born speller

My (rather basic and limited) understanding is that spacetime is not bent BY gravity. Gravity IS the bending of spacetime, gravity is the name we give to the effects of spacetime bending.

Spacetime is bent by the presence of matter or energy.

(I'll quietly shuffle away now before you ask "HOW/WHY does mass-energy warp spacetime" ...)

Maybe the easiest way of thinking about it is to consider general relativity as just a mathematical model - it gives us a set of rules to describe and predict how things are, but it doesn't tell us WHY those rules work.