Happy Yule to you all

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Offline DoctorBeaver

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Happy Yule to you all
« on: 21/12/2008 09:18:07 »
Just in case there are any other heathen bas**rds like me out there  [;D]
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Offline Karen W.

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« Reply #1 on: 21/12/2008 11:55:36 »
Happy yule Eth....have a great time!

"Life is not measured by the number of Breaths we take, but by the moments that take our breath away."

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Offline DoctorBeaver

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« Reply #2 on: 21/12/2008 12:02:56 »
Thank you, Karen. I shall try
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Offline Karen W.

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« Reply #3 on: 21/12/2008 12:16:18 »
I hope so too.. right now.. I am way bored can't sleep!
my mind is somewhere between the gutter and heaven.....Hows that for merry Chritmas! Someone sent me a nice muscle pin up....Lol...

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Offline DoctorBeaver

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« Reply #4 on: 21/12/2008 12:20:01 »
Lucky you  [;D]
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Offline Karen W.

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« Reply #5 on: 21/12/2008 12:30:55 »
Lucky you  [;D]

 Yeah.. thats about all the action..I will see  this Christmas... lol... too bad pin up man doesn't whisper sweet nothings or give  up some sugar! lol....

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Offline DoctorBeaver

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« Reply #6 on: 21/12/2008 12:33:48 »
You naughty girl!  [:0]
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Offline Karen W.

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« Reply #7 on: 21/12/2008 12:53:12 »
Indeedy yes I am.. I should borrow Neils blow up doll.. I bet he is the hunk of hunky hunks!!! lol..or maybe I should should just find Daniel! LOL...LOL...

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Offline DoctorBeaver

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« Reply #8 on: 21/12/2008 13:12:34 »
You think Neil is a hunk?  [:o]
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Offline RD

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« Reply #9 on: 21/12/2008 13:22:14 »

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Offline Karen W.

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« Reply #10 on: 21/12/2008 13:25:19 »
You think Neil is a hunk?  [:o]

Of course' but I was not referring to Neil.. but to Neils Blow up doll!....Lol... I figure  sheepy picked out a hunk for his blow up pal.. so only fair he share the handsome fellow eh?..LOL..

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Offline DoctorBeaver

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« Reply #11 on: 21/12/2008 13:30:53 »
He looks rather effeminate. The doll, not Neil.
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Offline RD

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« Reply #12 on: 21/12/2008 13:34:40 »
He looks rather effeminate. The doll, not Neil.

Is it the "hands-on-hips" pose ?, or that he is doing the washing-up ?   [:)]

[I suspect I can guess where they have put the valve on the inflatable husband doll.  [:I] ]
« Last Edit: 21/12/2008 13:36:18 by RD »

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Offline Karen W.

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« Reply #13 on: 21/12/2008 13:37:44 »
I should borrow Neils blow up doll..


[attachment=5991]

http://www.goofbag.com/index.php?productID=221

LOL....LOL... awwwww he doesn't look to lively there eh?  I am worried.. I am sure I.d wear him out and he would become quite windy and even  might perk up and fly away with me if he is suddenly deflated!! lol....

Yes I think he is doing the washing up !!

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Offline Karen W.

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« Reply #14 on: 21/12/2008 13:43:59 »
He looks rather effeminate. The doll, not Neil.

Yes his legs are ill proportioned!
« Last Edit: 21/12/2008 13:58:40 by Karen W. »

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Offline Karen W.

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« Reply #15 on: 21/12/2008 13:50:34 »
He looks rather effeminate. The doll, not Neil.

Is it the "hands-on-hips" pose ?, or that he is doing the washing-up ?   [:)]

[I suspect I can guess where they have put the valve on the inflatable husband doll.  [:I] ]
Well If thats true of the valve I may be disappointed when pulling or tugging to hard eh? He may be very fragile and become somewhat whimpy on me very quickly!..Lol...

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Offline RD

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« Reply #16 on: 21/12/2008 14:01:11 »
Inflatable man could have other uses, e.g. driving in the carpool lane ...

Quote
Blow-up dolls, shop mannequins and dogs dressed up as children have all been used to try and justify driving in lanes where vehicles are required to have at least three occupants.
http://www.reuters.com/article/oddlyEnoughNews/idUSHER25771920080612

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Offline DoctorBeaver

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« Reply #17 on: 21/12/2008 14:29:53 »
Is that a little yellow bow in his hair? Or just a hairslide?
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Offline RD

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« Reply #18 on: 21/12/2008 17:11:36 »
Like most things the description on the packaging will probably bear little resemblance to the actual product ...

http://uk.youtube.com/watch?v=RfyWfvNz9Z0&feature=related   [:)]

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Offline Make it Lady

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« Reply #19 on: 21/12/2008 20:17:07 »
Is that a little yellow bow in his hair? Or just a hairslide?
I think they are highlights so he is very gay. The description also makes him a gay man. It is just a shame that gay men like other men otherwise they would be perfect.
Give a man a fire and he is warm for a day, set a man on fire and he is warm for the rest of his life.

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blakestyger

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« Reply #20 on: 21/12/2008 21:17:11 »
I appreciate a secular greeting so a happy Yule to you, Dr Beaver - and a tolerable New Year.

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Offline JnA

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« Reply #21 on: 22/12/2008 07:18:37 »
I love the way one of the Blow up husband's attributes are that it floats...


becasue, you know... that *is* very important. In fact I'm going to check and see if my partner floats and if he doesn't....  *shakes fist* 




Hope you have a very nice couple of days.. however you use them.
Who is first to have Christmas? I know we have some Australian eastern states posters.. any New Zealanders? Anyone from Kiritimati?

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Offline Karen W.

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« Reply #22 on: 22/12/2008 09:01:21 »
Inflatable man could have other uses, e.g. driving in the carpool lane ...

Quote
Blow-up dolls, shop mannequins and dogs dressed up as children have all been used to try and justify driving in lanes where vehicles are required to have at least three occupants.
http://www.reuters.com/article/oddlyEnoughNews/idUSHER25771920080612


Women use them in their car so others think they are not alone when driving on trips alone etc...

Be a pretty boring ride!

"Life is not measured by the number of Breaths we take, but by the moments that take our breath away."

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Offline DoctorBeaver

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« Reply #23 on: 22/12/2008 09:39:22 »
I love the way one of the Blow up husband's attributes are that it floats...

It's a witch!
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Offline Ben Aldhouse

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« Reply #24 on: 22/12/2008 10:12:11 »
I hope you all had a good solstice! If yesterday was Yulemas then what's today? Those Christians get all pugnacious with their Boxing Day...

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Offline DoctorBeaver

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« Reply #25 on: 22/12/2008 10:13:28 »
For most pagans today is Hangover Day  [:D]
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Offline Andrew K Fletcher

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« Reply #26 on: 22/12/2008 19:03:19 »
Bet your off to sink those chisel teeth into a nice tree trunk or 6 over the festering season. Watch out for the trappers and give my regards to Jim Bowie and Dave Crocket, who spent many years with a beaver keeping their heads warm, apparently.

Merry Crimbo Eth And a glorious new year to everyone Ho Ho Ho = buy 1 get 2 free
Science is continually evolving. Nothing is set in stone. Question everything and everyone. Always consider vested interests as a reason for miss-direction. But most of all explore and find answers that you are comfortable with

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Offline JimBob

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« Reply #27 on: 24/12/2008 21:19:56 »
Bet your off to sink those chisel teeth into a nice tree trunk or 6 over the festering season. Watch out for the trappers and give my regards to Jim Bowie and Dave Crocket, who spent many years with a beaver keeping their heads warm, apparently.

Merry Crimbo Eth And a glorious new year to everyone Ho Ho Ho = buy 1 get 2 free

It is actually a purported to be a 'coon skin cap. ('coon = raccoon) Beavers adorned the heads of the ones who could afford them - they are quite nice. I have had one.
 
The mind is like a parachute. It works best when open.  -- A. Einstein

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Offline DoctorBeaver

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« Reply #28 on: 24/12/2008 21:31:50 »
I would quite enjoy sitting on your head and crapping down your back!  [:P]
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paul.fr

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« Reply #29 on: 24/12/2008 23:31:13 »
Bugger this "Yule" lark.

Merry Christmas, all. I bring gifts of the most wonderful christmas carols...


MR HANKY THE CHRISTMAS POO

We all know of Rudolph and his shining nose
And we all know Frosty who's made out of snow
But all of those stories seem kind of... gay
`Cause we all know who brightens up our holiday

Mr. Hankey the Christmas Poo
Small and brown he comes from you
Sit on the toilet here he comes
Squeeze him 'tween your festive buns

A present from down below
Spreading joy with a "Howdy-Ho!"
He's seen the love inside of you
`Cause he's a piece of poo

Sometimes he's nutty
Sometimes he's corny
He can be brown or greenish brown
(Mmmmhmmm!)
But if you eat fiber on Christmas eve
He might come to your town!

Mr. Hankey the Christmas Poo
He loves me, I love you
Therefore, vicariously he loves you!

I can make a Mr. Hankey too! (Pffffft)

Cartman: Well Kyle where is he?
Kyle: Ehh .. He's coming!
Stan: Come on dude, push!
Kyle: Ehhhh... I'm Trying!
Cartman: Wait, wait I can see his head!
Kyle: Here he comes!

[POP!]

Mr. Hankey: Howdy Ho!

I'm Mr. Hankey the Christmas Poo
Seasons Greetings to all of you!
Let's sing songs and dance and play
Now before I melt away.

Here's a game I like to play
Stick me in your mouth and try to say
Howdy ho ho yum yum yum
Christmas Time has come!

Singers: Sometimes He's runny
Sometimes he's firm
Sometimes he practically water.
Sometimes he hangs off the end of your ass
And wont fall in the toilet
'Cause he's just clinging to your sphincter
And he wont drop off .. and so you shake your ass around
And try to get it to drop in the toilet and finally it does.

Mr. Hankey the Christmas Poo
When Christmas leaves he must leave too.
Flush him down but he's never gone
His smell and his spirit linger on.

Howdy Ho!

AND

I FARTED ON SANTAS KNEE (LAP FOR THOSE AMERICANS)

OR THIS:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FlFjR2vUy3M&feature=related

Mom made beans for dinner

you know i ate em all

said come get your coat on

goin to the mall gona visit santa

and sit apon his knee

but all that I could think about

was how not to cut the cheese

waiting there for santa

thought that id explode

the gas bubble grew bigger

with every ho ho ho

try my best to hide that I was doing swell

but when Isat down on santas lap he hollard whats that smell !



~chorus~

I farted on santas lap

now Christmas is gonna stink for me

I farted on santas lap

now ill get &*&*&*& under my Christmas tree



I asked him for a baseball

I asked him for a bat

I asked him for some ice skates

but I'll get none of that

I asked him for a lot of things

I'll have to do with out

when i sat down on santas lap

I let one slip out

~chorus~

On Christmas eve I snuck out

of my bed with out a sound

went down to the living room to take a look around

and then I saw santanext to the Christmas tree

his arms were full of preasents and they were all for me

put them in a pile got up to turn around

then blew a fart with such great force our tree all most

so I'll always charish that speacial moment when

I realized even old saint nick rips one now and then

~chorus~
« Last Edit: 24/12/2008 23:33:19 by Paul. »

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Offline LeeE

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« Reply #30 on: 25/12/2008 00:08:45 »
Happy bah, humbug to all.
...And its claws are as big as cups, and for some reason it's got a tremendous fear of stamps! And Mrs Doyle was telling me it's got magnets on its tail, so if you're made out of metal it can attach itself to you! And instead of a mouth it's got four arses!

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Offline Hadrian

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« Reply #31 on: 25/12/2008 11:49:49 »
Happy Christmas indeed to one and all, even the Hum Buggers!  LOL

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Offline JimBob

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« Reply #32 on: 31/12/2008 16:53:27 »
I would quite enjoy sitting on your head and crapping down your back!  [:P]

Beaver hats are made from DEAD beaver pelts - how can you crap down my back if you are a disemboweled hunk of fur, removed from the skin, and pounded into felt?

(Beavers are very disadvantaged, like Gypsies. They don't have any place in a beaver lodge to teach the kits [or the knowledge and mental capacity for such an endeavor.] Thus they cannot learn how anything is done, including how their forefathers [and mothers] were trapped, skinned and transformed into haberdasheral splendor for humans.)

Poor lout - he tries SO hard!
The mind is like a parachute. It works best when open.  -- A. Einstein

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Offline Andrew K Fletcher

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« Reply #33 on: 31/12/2008 21:04:47 »
They also have goofy teeth

I would quite enjoy sitting on your head and crapping down your back!  [:P]

Beaver hats are made from DEAD beaver pelts - how can you crap down my back if you are a disemboweled hunk of fur, removed from the skin, and pounded into felt?

(Beavers are very disadvantaged, like Gypsies. They don't have any place in a beaver lodge to teach the kits [or the knowledge and mental capacity for such an endeavor.] Thus they cannot learn how anything is done, including how their forefathers [and mothers] were trapped, skinned and transformed into haberdasheral splendor for humans.)

Poor lout - he tries SO hard!

Science is continually evolving. Nothing is set in stone. Question everything and everyone. Always consider vested interests as a reason for miss-direction. But most of all explore and find answers that you are comfortable with

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Offline DoctorBeaver

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« Reply #34 on: 31/12/2008 23:18:35 »
Less of it, you ba***rds!  [:(!]
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