[Karen W.]

IN deed It is. I can no longer live with it. I am not happy. I will stay but not under pretense. I know feelings are bad both sides I just would like to salvage the friendship!!

Karen

[moonfire]

Wow!  You are good!  I am trying to at least get a friendship from Denny, but after having several talks he cannot accept anything less in our relationship than to be together...aagghh!

"Lo" Loretta

[Karen W.]

That is what I fear the most as I can't keep this up much more!

Karen

[4getmenot (OP)]

wow...

k

[moonfire]

yep...sad, as I know i will truly miss his friendship, but we cannot mix oil and water

"Lo" Loretta

[Karen W.]

Did I offend you K? I hope not. Sorry more then you wanted to know?

Karen

[Karen W.]

I know things will be tense, he said before he left this week, plan out four hours for saterday ok!! What is with that?

 Loretta, I feel for you and Denny, I know this has been very hard and I too feel the same. 25 years is alot of time to just let go.. Thing is it isn't sudden the letting go has been happening since he cheated. He started the process and it has just taken me all these years to give up, I tried getting him to see a councelor , to talk about our problems, he said what problems we get along great! He has blinders on. He thinks the only problem we have ever had was his infidelity, but thats not true.. that only was the surface. he was unhappy he says he wasn't but you don't just go seeking love somewhere else if you are so happy! It doesnt work like that! Problems like not ever talking never saying goodmorning , goodnight honey, orI love you... Having to prod with a cattle prod to elicit the right response, I may as well set him up to a shock collar.. who wants to live with that where you constantly have to ask your sweetheart to love you.. my husband stepped out because his heart was never fully in our marraige. He wanted sex a companion when he came home a friend. I was young and thought that was what love was.. I even remember thinking am I in love shouldn't I feel something else. Nope I thought we have lived together for a year have a child comming and that must be that we are like old married couples.... man what a joke.Should have slammed the brakes on then! what was I thinking? Not much I think!~ I hope there is still hope to keep a friendship with him as he is a good man however misguided. I am not perfect either and it takes two to make or break a marraige. So we are both responsible. I just have to find a way to be able to live with myself and keep his heart safe too. He is my friend always has been!

Karen

[moonfire]

I understand Karen,it is so sad.  It is a difficult decision to make...but like myself, I have to break it off completely as I know his terms...I cannot accept it and he cannot accept mine..

"Lo" Loretta

[Karen W.]

I am proud that you have set your mind and are being firm about your decision.. I just wish maybe that I had not waited 25 years... we both could have had a happier life... but I really don't regreat , as I have three of the most beautiful children whom I love... and they do infact have his best qualities as well well as my worst! Some combo huh? There are things that have come to past but I need to know that was the way it was supposed to be for every thing there is a reason and I believe I have learned a great deal about my self as well as him and I.. It is a mistake to think that people don't change , because they do change.. The old qualities might still be there, but they have evolved in mind spirit and in many ways that are beyond understanding except to say life experiences change everyone and you cannot expect that to be any different.. Accepting all the new changes, now that's the trick, isn't it?

Karen

[moonfire]

Yepperdoodle...it sure is!  My biggest issue is with my family learning to accept my decision was right for me as this was a relationship I would've had to live with the rest of my life...grant it, it would've been interesting trying to juggle time to live on both sides of the other world even though he has told me he is willing to give up his father's estate and come over here permanently he doesn't realize it is not enough...it wasn't an issue with location for me..it was on a whole different realm...as we really already had that worked out...?



"Lo" Loretta

[Karen W.]

So sorry Loretta I wish things could have been different, Love is strange sometimes and I guess things just happen because they do... People change Priorities are different people all need different levels of love. some need passsion fire romance some need a friend only or a companion.. Others who knows, Love is so funny and yet its so very important.. Even if the love you choose is to love your self and respect that, for some thts monumental!!

Karen

[moonfire]

I hear ya!  Yep...I prefer passion, but companionship is awesome with it!

"Lo" Loretta

[Karen W.]

Well, I hope everything goes the way its supposed to for everyone and at least if things are resolved one way or the other, life will become much less complicated..

Karen

[moonfire]

It is and it will!  It has no choice!  It has to leave!  I am a bit mad as I had a bit of manipulation with my cellie tonight...sorry if I sound a bit pissed....okay, I am!  No cellie as he wants to see who has called or is calling me...ooooo...awww, I feel better now!

"Lo" Loretta

[Karen W.]

So sorry Loretta. I guess he is really wearing out the welcome!! YIKES>>> Well let me know I would be happy to call you up babe, hows about a whittle date!!HEE HEE HEE!! WANNA SHAKE THINGS UP!!LOL Really it will be alright hang tough soon soon soon!! COUNT TO TEN, then do it again! Breath deeply, no hyperventilating... HA HA, never works for me, usually to upset to breath deep!

Karen

[moonfire]

Yep...he is in his desperate mode...but it is working against him.  so sad.  LOL  You are so funny and thanks for making me smile!  I have counted to 500 in French and German....I am about to start in Spanish...uno, kidding..If I breathe, someone is going to have to call 911 as Loretta will definitely turn blue from holding it in too deeply!

"Lo" Loretta

[Karen W.]

Oh Loretta, I am so sorry, now tell me about Niagra falls? was were the falls spectacular? could you feel the spay of water in your face!! Hey Lo, write me a poem!! Make it Good I will do one for you..Ready set Go::

Karen

[moonfire]

You are so funny...yes, Niagra Falls is very refreshing...with the water splashing upon your face and if you ride the queen boat, you will need to wear a raincoat!  You will see prisms through the spray and discover you have just dreamt all day!  Karen you are the pride and joy and I am so glad that you are rather cute and coy!  What else can I say, that can express it anymore than a Niagra spray!  You will have to go and see it...and go along with all the rest to be it!  There you go and it is especially written to you by only one Lo!

"Lo" Loretta

[Karen W.]

Geesh, I am Blushing that was cute, very nice Loretta, You feeling bettta??

Karen

[moonfire]

yeah, home and cell with flowers and note is on my bed...but i am still disappointed...geez, I hate jealousy...

"Lo" Loretta