[The Scientist (OP)]

Here are some jokes we hope you'll enjoy:

A neutron goes into a restaurant and ask the waiter,"How much for a drink?" The waiter replies,"For you, no charge."

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Just as I can't stand between two adjacent steps, an electron can't exist between two energy levels.

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More coming soon... Please comment if you like such jokes. Thank you!

[Bored chemist]

A biochemist walks into a bar and ask the barman for a pint of adenosine triphosphate.
"Certainly sir" said the barman, "That will be 80p".

A mosquito was heard to complain,
that a chemist had poisoned his brain.
The cause of his sorrow,
was para dichloro
diphenyltrichloroethane.

[omid]

omid got one as well []

A chemistry professor couldn't resist interjecting a little philosophy into a class lecture. He interrupted his discussion on balancing chemical equations, saying, "Remember, if you're not part of the solution, you're part of the precipitate!" []

[Make it Lady]

When I first started teaching I drew a beautiful diagram of an sp hybrid orbital on the board. I was very animated as I explained "This is the orbitals "S"ness and this is it's......" I stopped myself just in time. The students nodded sagely before bursting into gales of laughter.

I must admit, I used it again with the next years intake of students as it certainly boosted their attention.

[chris]

That's fantastic, although I've never heard anyone refer to the orbitals as having s-ness...

[Make it Lady]

That's fantastic, although I've never heard anyone refer to the orbitals as having s-ness...

Chris you have never lived! You should see me when I'm doing my science shows...I'm on fire! The fire brigade usually puts me out though.