Gary and Matt - dads through IVF

People have IVF for a variety of different reasons - one of course being fertility problems. But Gary and Matt have a different story. They are now dads, thanks to IVF treatment...

Gary - I’m Gary.

Elliot - I’m Elliot.

Matt - I’m Matt.

Verity - I’m Verity!

Gary - Matt and I went for an adoption meeting, which we decided shortly afterwards was not a route that we wanted to go down. A couple of months later we told our families that we’d done that and were sort of thinking about starting a family, but were back to square one really.

And then a few weeks later my amazing sister-in-law sent me a message and said if we wanted to go down the surrogacy route, she would be honoured if she would be able to carry, or try to carry, the baby. It’s an amazing thing to do and we will never be able to thank her enough.

Logistically it’s a very long process. There’s a lot of red tape: forms to fill out, committees to go through, tests to have, decisions to make. But it’s all worth it in the end isn’t it? The most incredible bit was when they actually put the eggs in and I was allowed to be there for that. On the screen is these two little dots went in, and that’s Elliot and Verity.

Katie - Who is the biological father? Matt, this is you?

Matt - Although there’s no blood connection, Oli was Gary’s sister-in-law. The clinic and us felt that it didn’t blur the lines if I was the biological father.

Gary - And also personal medical history it was easier on both counts for Matt to be the father genetically. Yes, it was a tough decision and I thought it would bother me but it really doesn’t. And I just remember being in the bathroom cleaning my teeth when the text message came through to say that she’d done the pregnancy test and she was pregnant, you and I just bursting into tears, sitting down on the floor and just couldn’t quite take it all in. I think we were both late for work that day.

Katie - What about the eggs?

Matt - The clinic found us an egg donor who’d obviously been through the whole screening process. The clinic give you information yes, about their history: medical and a bit about their personality, their working life, and their situation. Even their physical attributes just so you get a picture.

You just go through so many different emotions during the process: excitement, anticipation, fear. Ultimately, you know it’s our dream come true. I think we never really wanted to believe it was happening until the actual moment that they were here.